Armed Polite Society

Main Forums => The Roundtable => Topic started by: grampster on December 18, 2005, 08:19:38 AM

Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: grampster on December 18, 2005, 08:19:38 AM
A man was waiting for the birth of his son.  On Christmas day, he took his wife to the hospital to give birth.  He anxiously waited for the new of the birth.  Eventualy the doctor appeared and he was sad.  He told the man that his son had been born, but he had no arm, legs or torso.  He was only a head.  The man was joyful that his son was alive regardless of his shortcomings.  For many years the father doted on his child.
Then, 21 years later, on Christmas day, he carried his son to the tavern to celebrate his coming of age.
He placed his son on the bar and ordered a glass of whiskey for him.  The bartender shook his head but placed the drink in front of the lad.  He took a sip and WHAM a torso popped out of the bottom of his head.  The bar patrons were stunned.  The father said take another sip my son.  The boy took another slug and WHAM a pair of arms and hands popped out of the torso.  The patrons began cheering.  The bartender shook his head but placed another drink in front of the lad when the father cried another round.  The son picked up the drink with his new hands and slugged it down and WHAM a pair of legs and feet popped out of the torso.  People were cheering and dancing in the tavern.
The son leaped to his feet and whirled around the bar and then ran out the door on his new legs, directly in front of  a truck which hit him and killed him.

The moral of the story, said the bartender, is that he should have quit while............... he was a head.   Tongue
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: bermbuster on December 18, 2005, 08:44:53 AM
GROAN Smiley
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: MaterDei on December 18, 2005, 08:53:04 AM
You took the time to type this?  Slow day, huh? Smiley
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: Strings on December 18, 2005, 09:32:17 AM
grampster, you've been hanging around Preacherman too much!
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: Preacherman on December 18, 2005, 02:55:16 PM
Hunter, I plead innocence on that count...  even I couldn't think up one that bad!!!

cheesy
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: Strings on December 18, 2005, 06:13:30 PM
>Hunter, I plead innocence on that count...  even I couldn't think up one that bad!!!<

RIIIIGHT!!! Tell me another one, man! "innocence" could only POSSIBLY be used to describe you if we were discussing the Lincoln Assassination... Wink Tongue
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: garrettwc on December 18, 2005, 07:45:42 PM
I don't know which is worse, that I had the joke figured out halfway through, or that I actually read to the end to see if I was right. Tongue
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: Stickjockey on December 19, 2005, 04:35:06 AM
Ouch.
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: onions! on December 19, 2005, 05:14:52 AM
Excellent!:)
Title: A Christmas Story
Post by: grampster on December 19, 2005, 12:09:36 PM
41 Mag,

Good ole W. Meechigan humor, eh?  I tink it's da snow and cold, yah?

Hunter,
The good Padre does do things to you that are insidious. As a result, his influence has actually started to put more pun in my life.

garrett,
Double Tongue