Warm fuzzy dog stuff...

[280plus]

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
-Anonymous

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
-Ann Landers

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
-Will Rogers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
-Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
himself.
-Josh Billings


The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
-Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam

Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love and hate.
-Sigmund Freud

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
-Rita Rudner

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three
times before lying down.
-Robert Benchley

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
-Franklin P. Jones

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have
known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
-James Thurber

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.
-Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
-Joe Weinstein

Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
-Anne Tyler

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
-Robert A. Heinlein



If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a  dog and a man.
-Mark Twain

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
-Roger Caras

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your
pocket and then give him only two of them.
-Phil Pastoret

My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am.

[grislyatoms]

Dogs are the best. No matter what kind of day I have had, no matter what I have screwed up or broken, my dog is always at the door when I come home. She has a little white tip on her tail; when I come home her tail is going so fast she looks like a little helicopter trying to take off.

Just a couple days ago my daughter and I were playing around with water balloons. We would roll them down the hill by our house and see how long they would last. Our dog started whining and crying when she saw the balloons rolling down the hill, so we let her play, too.

She would run after one, get it in her mouth, then Pop! Where did it go? She looked around, sniffed the ground, backtracked, and it was gone! Oh, well. Roll another one, Dad!

Chase, grab, Pop!

I haven't laughed so hard in quite awhile.

[onions!]

Dogs rule!
I'll add this I recv'd from a friend.

Why dogs don't live as long as people.



> Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year old
> Irish Wolfhound named Belker.  The dog's owners; Ron, his wife Lisa
> and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker and they
> were hoping for a miracle.  I examined Belker and found he was dying
> of cancer.  I told the family there were no miracles left for Belker
> and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in
> their home.  As we made arrangements  Ron and Lisa told me they
> thought it would be good for the four-year-old Shane to observe the
> procedure. They felt Shane could learn something from the experience.
> The next day I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family
> surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last
> time. I wondered if he understood what was going on.  Within a few
> minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away. The little boy seemed to
> accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion.  We
> sat together for a while after Belker's death, wondering aloud about
> the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.  Shane,
> who had been listening quietly, piped up, "I know why."  Startled, we
> all turned to him.  What came out of his mouth next stunned me - I'd
> never heard a more comforting explanation.  He said,  "Everybody is
> born so that they can learn how to live a good life - like loving
> everybody and being nice, right?"  The four-year-old continued,  
> "Well, animals already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay
> as long."

[Tallpine]

Ain't but three things in this world that's worth a solitary dime, but old dogs, children, and watermelon wine.
Tom T. Hall

[Gewehr98]

Mrs. G-98 and I went to Wisconsin for a week, returning Saturday morning at 0330, after driving through snow, traffic snarls, etc.  We were both exhausted.

The reception we got from our dogs as we quietly walked into the door was a wonderful reminder of their loyalty and friendship.  Not that my stepsons weren't glad to see us, but the dogs, they were genuinely thrilled.  Bernie resumed his rightful place at my side, even as we were quickly snoozing.  

The cats I've owned would've yawned and either gone back to sleep, or hinted that another serving of Friskies would be appropriate...

[Nathaniel Firethorn]

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx

- NF

[Guest]

Everything here applies to a ferret that is raised right and with no cage.

Everything.

[Tallpine]

Our cats are affectionate, and even go for walks with us sometimes.

We must look kind of funny ... walking down the county road with two dogs and 2 or 3 cats tagging along

At least the cats are smart enough not to chase cars

[LawDog]

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell
one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it
still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the
mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a
dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice
ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler
Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears
him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic
energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must
remember to be a good dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw
it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I
like the way they smell.

3.  I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although
they are tasty.

4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.

6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's
driver's license and registration.

9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the
toilet.

10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of
saying "hello".

11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee
table.

12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house -
not after.

13. I will not throw up in the car.

14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch
when we have company.

16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes
that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And, finally, My last two questions . .

Dear God: Why do humans only have 10 Commandments and dogs have 16?

And:  When I get to Heaven do I get my testicles back?

LawDog

[matis]

Funny as he]], LawDog.

But I'm glad my dog can't read it.



matis

[K Frame]

My dogs come first.

I make that very clear to people. I've turned down jobs because of my dogs. I've gotten into fights at the office because I put my dogs first.

I figure one of these days I might meet a human I like half as much as my dogs, but I'm not holding my breath.