Post by: Perd Hapley on January 24, 2007, 10:37:05 AM
Post by: CAnnoneer on January 24, 2007, 10:43:44 AM
(No, I will not volunteer myself.)
Post by: BrokenPaw on January 24, 2007, 10:55:20 AM
Post by: Brad Johnson on January 24, 2007, 10:58:35 AM
Brad
Post by: Ex-MA Hole on January 24, 2007, 11:23:13 AM
Make that third
Post by: Twycross on January 24, 2007, 11:30:00 AM
Post by: charby on January 24, 2007, 11:30:08 AM
I just want to tell the UN to move out of NY and find a new home.
Executive order to roll back all firearms laws.
Fine the daylights out of folks who hire illegal workers.
-C
Post by: wingnutx on January 24, 2007, 11:40:30 AM
I want PJ O'Rourke for VP, and then I'll resign and let him have the conn.
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 24, 2007, 11:44:09 AM
Could we declare all of APS to be a single hive-mind, and have the forum itself run for POTUS? We'd have to make sure that the average member age is 35 or greater, though.
We are a hive mind. Report to the programming deck.
I thought about Art, too. Why him?
Post by: onions! on January 24, 2007, 11:48:38 AM
Blunt common sense.
I'd like to see Barbara on there too.
Post by: Fly320s on January 24, 2007, 11:58:25 AM
Post by: cosine on January 24, 2007, 11:58:57 AM
Post by: Monkeyleg on January 24, 2007, 01:21:24 PM
And El T for VP. Hey, you gotta have an attorney on the ticket, right?
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 24, 2007, 01:46:13 PM
Wait a minute, he's not going to play second fiddle to a Southerner.
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 24, 2007, 02:05:31 PM
Art or Preacherman.
Preach ain't eligible.
Post by: Sylvilagus Aquaticus on January 24, 2007, 03:53:24 PM
It doesn't cause me to like him any less, however. I blame all those years he spent in Austin. He'd be more of a moderate on a national scale.
Regards,
Rabbit.
Post by: RadioFreeSeaLab on January 24, 2007, 08:09:48 PM
Post by: RocketMan on January 24, 2007, 08:13:44 PM
Post by: El Tejon on January 25, 2007, 03:50:42 AM
As Attorney General I will crack down on those terrorists that pollute our beloved lawns with their assault vehicles and assault boats (I have a new hilljack neighbor that has parked a freakin' jet ski on his lawn [a jet ski in January]), assault trash cans that are not put away 12 hours after trash pick up, terrorists who plot against our democracy by sitting on their front porches, and terrorists who watch television instead of cleaning their houses. I will not rest until the War on Yeehawism is won!
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 25, 2007, 03:54:13 AM
Post by: El Tejon on January 25, 2007, 04:06:26 AM
If you are against me, I will put you in the Axis of Yeehawism.
Post by: mtnbkr on January 25, 2007, 04:17:25 AM
As Attorney General I will crack down on those terrorists that pollute our beloved lawns with their assault vehicles and assault boats (I have a new hilljack neighbor that has parked a freakin' jet ski on his lawn [a jet ski in January]), assault trash cans that are not put away 12 hours after trash pick up, terrorists who plot against our democracy by sitting on their front porches, and terrorists who watch television instead of cleaning their houses. I will not rest until the War on Yeehawism is won!
Lost my vote with that one. Not that I do those things, but I won't support those laws, especially one that bans "sitting on their front porches". Chris
Post by: El Tejon on January 25, 2007, 04:21:30 AM
BTW, even before I am Attorney General, I am substituting the Chicago Bears for North Korea in the Axis of Evil.
Post by: Ben on January 25, 2007, 04:23:08 AM
Quote
I will crack down on those terrorists that pollute our beloved lawns with their assault vehicles
Yes, but will you close the assault major appliances on the porch loophole? What about the assault mullet loophole?
Post by: mtnbkr on January 25, 2007, 04:35:35 AM
We must protect democracy and putting porch sitters in Gitmo is the best way to do so.
You can have my porch when you pry it from my cold, dead, incredibly firm buttocks. 
Chris
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 25, 2007, 04:38:22 AM
and now this. Where's the barf smiley?
Post by: Ezekiel on January 25, 2007, 04:54:58 AM
That proposed "free-flying mullet" addendum has me quite concerned.
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 25, 2007, 05:20:42 AM
That proposed "free-flying mullet" addendum has me quite concerned.
That is because you are a mullet-sporting Communist pervert. Why do you hate America?
Post by: Ezekiel on January 25, 2007, 08:53:00 AM
I say it's Socialist!
Post by: Headless Thompson Gunner on January 25, 2007, 09:12:05 AM
BTW, even before I am Attorney General, I am substituting the Chicago Bears for North Korea in the Axis of Evil.
That gets my vote!
Post by: El Tejon on January 25, 2007, 12:06:47 PM
After I declare Yeehaws "enemy combatants" and round them up (maybe I will use Wal-Mart gift cards as incentives) I will send them to re-education camps in swanky areas of Manhattan and D.C. They will learn to read books, eat salads, brush their teeth, floss, clean up after themselves, and go to theaters, not NASCAR races.
This will improve my life as I will be rid of Yeehaws and it will enrage liberals as they will be surrounded by Yeehaws.
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 25, 2007, 12:16:28 PM
Post by: Ezekiel on January 25, 2007, 12:28:59 PM
Post by: El Tejon on January 26, 2007, 02:55:06 AM
Hah! Nomination update: my neighborhood association is having its winter meeting on February 1st. I will skip practice to attend so that I may rally support for the nomination as the new Attorney General.
Once I clean up Hedgewood (a neighborhood near downtown Lafayette) of trash cans left out too long, crazy old men who put stuffed sharks in their windows, lawns that are not edged and raked, institute mandatory dental hygenie classes to ensure proper flossing and tongue scraping and conduct house to house searches for NASCAR material, I can branch out to the nation as a whole!
Remember my motto, APS: Better freedom through a police state!
Post by: 280plus on January 26, 2007, 03:11:30 AM
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 26, 2007, 03:20:17 AM
Post by: 280plus on January 26, 2007, 03:21:45 AM
Post by: crt360 on January 26, 2007, 01:09:47 PM
http://www.bizarrefun.com/Insultsrus/FAH157.jpg
Post by: Firethorn on January 26, 2007, 06:36:11 PM
*A much better title than 'President' don't you think?
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 26, 2007, 06:43:56 PM
Citizen, you WILL take this firearm. OR ELSE!
Post by: 280plus on January 27, 2007, 02:06:13 AM
Like post-Katrina law-enforcement, but in reverse?
Citizen, you WILL take this firearm. OR ELSE!
Sounds like Texas, I love it... Citizen, you WILL take this firearm. OR ELSE!
Post by: Perd Hapley on January 27, 2007, 03:23:31 AM
Post by: Ron on January 27, 2007, 06:40:13 AM
My recent lack of motivation and laziness would be a real asset in running that department.
Maybe if I became motivated I could reverse its function and promote the responsible use of the items in my charge.