R.I.P. Scout26
The campaign which I mentioned — and I would urge you all to take part in it — is called JustATampon. You take a photograph of yourself holding the tampon — either still in its little torpedo chute or liberated and held by the tail like a dead albino mouse — and post the selfie online. You can also make a donation of £3 to the cause which, I’ve been told, will empower women around the world. I’m not sure quite what it will empower them to do — go out and buy some more shoes? Sit at home with a box set of Wolf Hall? — but either way, it can only be a good thing.
There is still some distance to travel before we reach that sunlit upland, but with every tampon selfie and donation we draw a little closer. In the meantime there will be many struggles — mostly with unnecessarily squeamish men. They will carp and cavil. They will respond with puerile humour masquerading as satire. But they will not win in the end.
That is all. *expletive deleted*ck you all, eat *expletive deleted*it, and die in a fire. I have considered writing here a long parting section dedicated to each poster, but I have decided, at length, against it. *expletive deleted*ck you all and Hail Satan.