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Author Topic: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,  (Read 2940 times)

never_retreat

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Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« on: June 01, 2012, 10:14:04 PM »
Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies, despite a recent string of zombie like behavior.
Never did trust the .gov and I'm not going to start now.
http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2012/06/zombie_apocalypse_cdc_says_not.html
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I needed a mod to change my signature because the concept of "family friendly" eludes me.
Just noticed that a mod changed my signature. How long ago was that?
A few months-mods

280plus

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2012, 10:15:26 PM »
Aw dammit!  :mad:
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230RN

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2012, 10:39:19 PM »
Quote
"CDC does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms)," agency spokesman David Daigle said in an e-mail to the Huffington Post today.

"Does not know of...."

There, see?  It is impossible to "know" this unless every virus or condition of the entire population has been examined.

I think the CDC has been taken over by real Zombies.

That's what I think, by gum, by golly, by cracky.

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WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

lee n. field

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2012, 10:41:13 PM »
Quote
Never did trust the .gov and I'm not going to start now.

Ayyyyup.  Now we can panic.
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makattak

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2012, 10:57:56 PM »
If this administration comes out with any announcement, I'm taking the opposite as true.

See you all in the bunker.
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I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.

So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world, Frodo, besides the will of evil. Bilbo was meant to find the Ring. In which case, you also were meant to have it. And that is an encouraging thought

TommyGunn

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2012, 11:23:51 PM »
They obviously have not totally examined every kongresskritter in DC.  :facepalm: [popcorn] [tinfoil] [tinfoil] ;/ ;)
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zxcvbob

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #6 on: June 02, 2012, 12:18:18 AM »
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"It's good, though..."

Viking

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #7 on: June 02, 2012, 03:01:19 AM »
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Nick1911

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #8 on: June 02, 2012, 03:08:19 AM »
I agree with 280.

The government says that zombies can't happen?  Aww, crap.  I don't have enough ammo.  :mad:
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seeker_two

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #9 on: June 02, 2012, 06:09:14 AM »
Quote from: TommyGunn on June 01, 2012, 11:23:51 PM
They obviously have not totally examined every kongresskritter in DC.  :facepalm: [popcorn] [tinfoil] [tinfoil] ;/ ;)

....or every Democrat voter in Chicago.....
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Fly320s

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #10 on: June 02, 2012, 07:47:36 AM »
The government doesn't deny non-events, therefore zombies must exist!
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RoadKingLarry

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #11 on: June 02, 2012, 08:44:02 AM »
The CDC doth protest too much, methinks.
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280plus

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #12 on: June 02, 2012, 08:54:00 AM »
Quote from: Nick1911 on June 02, 2012, 03:08:19 AM
I agree with 280.

The government says that zombies can't happen?  Aww, crap.  I don't have enough ammo.  :mad:
Just when tyou thought you might have enough...  :facepalm:
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Perd Hapley

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #13 on: June 02, 2012, 10:45:46 AM »
Quote from: seeker_two on June 02, 2012, 06:09:14 AM
....or every Democrat voter in Chicago.....



Chicago is the best proof that zombies exist. They show up on election day and vote Democratic.
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230RN

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #14 on: June 05, 2012, 05:16:41 AM »
^

Yeah, the Cemetery Registration van goes out three-four months before election day to register them.

"Are you a resident, Sir? How long have you been in Illinois?"

"Since 1818, when we finally got to be a State."

"Ok. I'll put you down as a Democrat for this election."

"Fine with me. Can I get back in my casket now?"



Gotta have that Universal Suffrage thing, don't we?

Terry, 230RN
« Last Edit: June 05, 2012, 05:22:10 AM by 230RN »
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WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

HankB

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #15 on: June 05, 2012, 06:07:19 AM »
Reporter: Do Zombies exist?

CDC: Absolutely not! There is no such thing as a Zombie! In fact, the term itself is offensive, a negative reflection on the vibrant Caribbean culture of Haiti, where . . .

Reporter: OK, how about Reanimated Deceased? Do they exist?

CDC: No comment.
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chefman

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #16 on: June 05, 2012, 07:26:58 AM »
Quote from: never_retreat on June 01, 2012, 10:14:04 PM
Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies, despite a recent string of zombie like behavior.
Never did trust the .gov and I'm not going to start now.
http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2012/06/zombie_apocalypse_cdc_says_not.html

Good, I was worried there for a bit....hold on, there is somebody at the do
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Just because you stepped in it don't mean you have to stand in it....just sayin'

zxcvbob

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Re: Its official the CDC says there are no such thing as zombies,
« Reply #17 on: June 05, 2012, 11:38:50 PM »
Steven Colbert has been stealing our material
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