Author Topic: When something is worse than nothing  (Read 1014 times)

Lee

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When something is worse than nothing
« on: December 15, 2006, 02:46:45 PM »
Sorry, I've had a few to drink and just need to vent....after all it is close to Christmas and all.  I work in Product Research and Development, and I just spent the past year busting my ass to deliver a new product on time, and under budget...including time away from home this summer and many sleepless nights.  It recently launched and is exceeding all expectations.  The Marketing folks held a happy hour tonight for all of those involved in the project and gave us all a gift certificate as a bonus.  I didn't open mine while I was there, but I heard a lot of talk from folks about how generous it was and how suprised they were about the amount.  After the alcohol flowed for a bit, I learned that these folks had received several hundred dollars. Many of these folks don't know anything about the product at all - they simply moved their part of the project along...while others were actually speed bumps along the way to launch. BUT - they do have advanced degrees and schmooze very well.
I just opened mine and it is for $25.   I can't help but feel it is just another slap in the face by these talking heads.  I just took the certificate to the basement for a little target practice with the BB pistol ...and I feel better now.  I'm going to keep it on my desk as a reminder to get that resume done.  I look forward to the day when the bullshitters, pseudoscientists, and project managers have no product to sell.  Thanks for listening.

Declaration Day

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #1 on: December 15, 2006, 03:08:54 PM »
OUCH!

Reminds me of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, when Clark opened his "bonus" to find it was a one-year membership to the jelly of the month club.


Sindawe

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #2 on: December 15, 2006, 04:11:31 PM »
OUCH indeed.  Bummer that you've been shafted so hard Lee.  I think all of us have been there at one time or another.  I've two such tales that come to mind.

1. In college, I'm working part time as a car wash for a car rental company that I'll not name (but they share a label with a certain decorated line of ships that travel the seas and the stars).  Company had a big in house contest going on, major prizes for offices that had lowest losses, highest earnings, that sort of thing.  The office I worked at scored tops in four out of the six categories, including cleanest cars (my doing alone).  The day prizes were to be awarded, it was announced that ONLY full time employees would take part in winnings, but part timers were S.O.L. 

And for some silly reason, they were shocked that I gave notice the following month to go make media, buffer and wash test tubes in a research lab working on Hepatitus A/B/C genome replication.

2. While in the Bloodmines of Boulder, it was announced by the bigwigs that there would be a bonus for all employees, as much as 30% of the years salary for some.  Much rejoicing was heard in offices, cubicals and production suites.  Until it was learned that the bonus program would only apply to SALARIED employees.  Hourly workers were considered just plug & play drones with little skill or worth. Never mind that 99% of the hourly staff had at least a B.S. in the hard sciences (Bio, Chem, a few Engineers just out of school) and we were the ones who actually ran the process that turned salt, sugar, water and air into human hemoglobin.  The managers and supervisors (all former "drones" themselves) went to bat and got a bonus for the hourly staff, but it was not long after that those hourly staff, with better than 100 collective years of experince in the industry, started leaving for greener pastures, I among them.  New staff tried, but they could not control the process as well, contamination issues arose and today another firm is using the facility to produce other sorts of proteins.
I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.

Standing Wolf

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #3 on: December 15, 2006, 04:49:41 PM »
I received a decidedly niggardly Christmas present from a former employer.
No tyrant should ever be allowed to die of natural causes.

Sylvilagus Aquaticus

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #4 on: December 15, 2006, 10:40:40 PM »
Long ago when I worked for a bank one year the 'Christmas Bonus' was $25.00 USD cash. After they took out the requisite taxes it was $17. and change.

I bought a bottle at the liquor store across the street when I left work that day.

The next year, it was 'your choice of any 4, no two the same' of smoked meat products from a local smokehouse, who incidentally was a customer.  Guess who ended up with turkey sausage and salami?

Now, understand, this institution chartered 3 Greyhounds and took the employees and spouses to Dallas for dinner and a floor show at the Fairmont/Pyramid room the year before twenty-five bucks. Maybe that's why.


Feh. I'm just glad to get the 25th off anymore.


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Rabbit.
To punish me for my contempt for authority, fate made me an authority myself.
Albert Einstein

Jamisjockey

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #5 on: December 16, 2006, 05:09:38 AM »
I received a decidedly niggardly Christmas present from a former employer.

What the hell?
JD

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grislyatoms

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #6 on: December 16, 2006, 06:17:18 AM »
I received a decidedly niggardly Christmas present from a former employer.

What the hell?

If you are referring to "niggardly", it doesn't mean what it seems to imply.

On topic, the best bonus I ever received was two weeks pay and two weeks off. This from a small-time Greek Orthodox employer who absolutely adored Christmas. I still send him a Christmas card every year.

The worst I ever got was a $5 gift card to Starbucks. This from a huge HMO employer that regularly gave upper management 50K bonuses (boni?).
"A son of the sea, am I" Gordon Lightfoot

Stand_watie

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #7 on: December 16, 2006, 06:35:30 AM »
I don't blame you for feeling bad. With the alcohol, public opening of bonuses and discussion, etc, it's a wonder nobody got punched, cussed out, lit their bonus check afire and put out in the bosses drink etc.

Very unwise choices there from several perspectives. You ought to give HR a heads up.



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Eleven Mike

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #8 on: December 16, 2006, 07:07:26 AM »
I received a decidedly niggardly Christmas present from a former employer.

What the hell?

What the hell?  Huh?









What are you so confused about?

Cromlech

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #9 on: December 16, 2006, 07:43:38 AM »
Niggardly basically means stingy, and is not related to the word '*let's not go there*', if that is what you were thinking.
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Perd Hapley

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Re: When something is worse than nothing
« Reply #10 on: December 16, 2006, 08:26:50 AM »
Unless he's confused about why SW is getting a bonus from a former employer.  That made me scratch my head at first.
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