So, it's Saturday night and I've got this question...

[cosine]

Okay, it's Saturday night, and 'midst my ponderings before I retire I've got this question:

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? :/

Somebody here on APS must know the answer. It's buggin' me! I need an answer before I go to bed!


(Okay, okay, I posted this 'cause I'm bored and there's too much business and no fun going on here tonight. All this Windoze this and Linuz that and tax and sound and cars and... and... oh well, you get the picture. I need a lighten-up tonic! )

[cosine]

You guys probably think I'm crazy. I'm not! I'm not, I tell you!

Now, does anyone have an answer to my question?

[garyk/nm]

3 cords. Now go to bed!

[Strings]

As much wood as a woodchuck could
is a woodchuck could chuck wood!


 Some people's kids, I tell ya...

[K Frame]

Probably about as much as Chuck Wood...

How much wood could Chuck Wood chuck if Chuck Wood could Chuck Wood...

[Chuck Dye]

A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

How much noise annoys an oyster?

[Nightfall]

A woodchuck chucks about 700 pounds of dirt when digging a burrow. Since these burrows are generally used for housing, we can assume the most likely reason for a woodchuck chucking wood would be for the purpose of constructing a log home. Well assume our furry friend is using a common tree in his habitat zone, in this example hickory, which has an approximate density of 45 pounds per cubic foot. Now, allowing for average air space in a standard 8x4x4ft cord of wood, we get about 80 cubic feet per cord. So we can extrapolate that a woodchuck would chuck about 1/5 of a cord of wood if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Or not. Hell, I dunno.

[yesterdaysyouth]

a smart woodchuck would grab a beer and worry about it tommorow....

[Stickjockey]

A woodchuck chucks about 700 pounds of dirt when digging a burrow. Since these burrows are generally used for housing, we can assume the most likely reason for a woodchuck chucking wood would be for the purpose of constructing a log home. Well assume our furry friend is using a common tree in his habitat zone, in this example hickory, which has an approximate density of 45 pounds per cubic foot. Now, allowing for average air space in a standard 8x4x4ft cord of wood, we get about 80 cubic feet per cord. So we can extrapolate that a woodchuck would chuck about 1/5 of a cord of wood if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Nightfall; find a woman, man.

The one that'll really keep you up at night: How many bagels could a beagle bake if a Beagle could bake bagels?

[grampster]

I see nothing has changed, not one iota, not a nit, since I went on sabbatical to the land of fruits and nuts.

[Sylvilagus Aquaticus]

If he were in HR he'd contract it out at $50. hr. to a H1B beaver and keep 70% for himself while offering the beaver health and dental insurance at above market rates while giving him the option of an under-performing pension/investment plan.



Regards,
Rabbit.