El Tejon: stupid incident contest winner!

[El Tejon]

Friday night I am burning off a sleeve of thin mint Girl Scout cookies on the treadmill at the gym.  My gym has one of those second levels that overlooks the rest of the gym and my treadmill was directly across from a racquetball court which is on the ground level near the entrance (its in one of those glass walled courts).

As a am setting a "blistering pace" of an 8 minute mile while watching "Reno911!", a racquetball comes out of the court (over the top of the glass) and hits me on the button of the chin.  I stumble as I react to this surprise (did not see it coming as I was watching the show) and fall backwards off the treadmill ruining my nice Sony headphones and slamming my shoulder against the stairstep machine to my rear.

I hereby declare myself "Doofus of the Week"!:D

[280plus]

I'd take an 8 minute mile any day...

Glad you didn't get hurt. I watched one spit this woman off once and she took a pretty good one.

I'd say either change treadmills or get a helmet.

[...has left the building.]

3/10/06- The last day that El Tejon EVER got a date at the gym.

[DJJ]

I got thrown off a treadmill in the exercise room at an apartment complex I once lived in, but there's more to it.

I had heard through the grapevine there were a group of Romanian Olympians living & training there ( Why Albuquerque? High altitude work? Who knows?). They (or at least a group of small, fit-looking people with Eastern European accents) happened to be in the exercise room one day, messing with the equipment, and of course, that's the time I fell. I'd even been telling myself, "Don't look bad in front of the Romanians", but of course...

[Spec ops Grunt]

One time I was in a friends game room upstairs and their was a treadmill, I turned it on, fiddled with some knobs.

Flung me a good 4 feet.  Landed on my back.

[Telperion]

Citizens demand video.

[Moondoggie]

Last Sunday I was headed down to the basement to use the NordicTrac...carrying a troublesome heater that had a problem with the tipover switch.  I was looking at the bottom of the heater, thinking about how to take it apart When..... I  "missed" the bottom two stairs.  They didn't miss me, though.  Let me tell you, our poured concrete basement wall has absolutely zero flex in it!  Oh colorful metaphor!

The good news is that I got the base off of the bottom of the heater without tools!

The bad news is that I also got some technicolor toes and a significant hitch in my get-along that's just now subsiding.  No broken bones though.  Thank goodness for the hot tub and drugs.

I'm telling 'Ya...those NordicTracs are killers!

[jefnvk]

Fell down a flight of stairs at school carrying a sled of ice fishing things, after forgetting about a few steps.  Messed up my ankle prety bad.
Fell down a different flight of the same stairs carrying an arm full of guns and ammo, after stepping on a silky sock.  Ammo box hit my leg and hurt it good.
Fell down a hill after geting a bit too close on skis and not being able to stop myself before going over.

It happens to the best of us.

DJJ - those guys were probably standing in the corner going 'lets leave all the stuff turned up, and see if we can trip up that guy'

[grampster]

Jefnvk,
You bin drinkin too much o dat OleMilwaukee, I tink, eh?

[Guest]

I try to stay away from gyms...

When I decided to Attend College as an Older Feller...well I was disappointed, the old rec room was turned into a Computer Lab. I had no idea - yet what that was, all I knew was the table tennis , pool tables, pinball and juke boxes I had played on as a "guest" of the campus were gone.

Aha! I spied the table tennis when I went in to the gym area to get my Official College Picture ID. This was after I had walked into the door because the girls swim team was practicing and could be seen thru the glass.

So the word comes down there is going to be a Table Tennis Tournament. I was not the only "old fart" attending College, in fact some of us knew each other..."Hey Steve - you gotta enter that thing..."

I did, I mean the girls were wearing shorts and tank tops, me being a studious student took real good notes...

I was doing really well, got to be a "young versus old" deal for a bit. I - representing the "older crowd".

I even had "MY" trademark paddle, sandpaper covering with the varish off the handle. Varnished handles are slippery when hands sweat...had my talc bag too...
Opponents had paddles from Star Wars or somesuch...I had socks older than some these folks...

I survived the BIG guy with German roots...he was just only about 6' 12" tall and could slam "down" really hard.

 I survived the Gal with Chinese blood - ( we had gone past the gender eliminations...getting right serious) Chinese folks take Table Tennis right serious...folks had to move way back behind me because I kept running way back there and I had kicked a few by accident.

I get this young 17 y/o in her 3 rd year of College...one of them 4.0 folks ...looks innocent until you put a Table Tennis paddle in her hand. She had on short shorts and tank top. That little gal could PLAY! Had a real smirky grin too...About 5'3" and agile, quick and could hit hard!.

I fall real nice...might as well go for style points if you are going to fall...right?

She had slammed that sucker and somehow I ran way back there and returned it...how I do not know.  Then she ever so "tapped" it back over. Here I come at full bore run all 6' and 160# at the time....I dove toward the table....

"SPLAT"...I took out the table and as I and the table were going down...the ping pong ball I had mangaged to hit somehow did not make it over the net...

Yes she won fair and square. Ended up being friends and she was very polite and went on to do great things. Just real smart at a young age.

I am remembered for style points, putting in a good fight for the older folks...and ended up with 3rd overall.

For a bit what was left of 'my table' was used for a door covering for a utility door and frame to mount a corkboard on for announcments. Finally My table was trashed...it was a sad day , I was notified and me and others tossed ruined ping pong balls and paddles into the trash with it...sniff...sniff...

That was my "old college" ...back then these tourneys were serious, one was excused from classes and allowed a tutor / private time with instructors to stay caught up, take exams later given if you were participating and one given...free Gatorade and other foods...

I walk in to my first class after my table breaking loss , limping, a bandage here and there from cuts and spinters , bruised, blackeye [like I said I went for ALL the style points] ...to a standing ovation.

Gyms are downright dangerous!  

[jefnvk]

Nah, dat der Olmilwaukee's sold as a dirdyturdy, cuz it takes all turdy to make ya feel good.

Now, I've been accused of trying to drink the Canucks out of Blue though.  And of keeping Chippewa Falls alive

(not really, though, if Campus Police or Houghton or Hancock's finest are monitoring this board )

[crt360]

El T, that was an instant classic moment.  Thanks for sharing it with us.  

Did you ever play Mousetrap as a kid?  Too bad you couldn't have kept the chain of events going a little longer.

[publius]

Can we take up a collection and approach El Tejon's gym about the possibility of selling some security tape of the incident?

[DJJ]

Only if we can raise more than El Tejon paid them not to show it.

[publius]

Hmmm... maybe we could afford just a still shot of the actual ball-chin impact!

[grampster]

I think slo-mo would be a hoot.  Maybe sometime I'll tell ya'll about the time I parked my jet ski on the dock.

[Ben]

Well, the only thing I have to contribute to this thread is, "damn those Girl Scouts!"

They put an addictive chemical in those cookies. I just know it.

[BillBlank]

As the ski and snowboard season draws to a close who amongst us has not managed to either hit the only tree for five square miles or in front of a group of the opposite sex, spotted a bump to do a neat jump off only for it to transform into a rock with a thin layer of snow. Board stops, I don't. I was told that I managed a tidy 2.5 rotations before dissappearing into a cloud of snow and obscenity arse first.

[publius]

OK, forget the Tejon video. I now want BillBlank wipeout video!

[Chris]

Okay, this may be the king of falls.  For reasons too long to go into here, the Mrs. had to pump breast milk, as the boy couldn't take it straight from the tap.  Anyways, Mrs. finishes her deposit, and hands me two uncapped bottles,  4 oz. each.  She tucks in for the evening, and I head for downstairs. Almost down when I step on the darned pile of towels I had put there earlier, and neglected to bring up stairs.  Fall on my back, boucing down the last few steps.  Of course, I had a bottle in each hand.  Left hand throws its contents all over the nice off white wall and the towels I had just pulled out of teh drier.  The right hand?  Onto my chest and face.  So, there I am, lying at the bottom of teh steps, covered in breast milk, trying to figure out what the hades just happened, when Mrs. appears.  Ask if I'm okay?  Nah, just start yelling about the fact that I just dumped 8oz of breast milk, ruined the paint job on the wall, and got her clean towels all dirty.  Man, I did not realize how bad breast milk would stain a wall.  Two coats of Kilz to cover it up.

[Ben]

breast milk

Onto my chest and face.

Quagmire/

Giggity Giggity Giggity.

/Quagmire