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Main Forums => The Roundtable => Topic started by: Northwoods on July 09, 2010, 03:16:36 AM

Title: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Northwoods on July 09, 2010, 03:16:36 AM
After that experience, I'd almost have preferred the feline variety.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: taurusowner on July 09, 2010, 03:55:06 AM
Do tell.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: kgbsquirrel on July 09, 2010, 05:40:44 AM
That's just not right, grabbing our attention like that and then skipping out on the details.  :lol:
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Fly320s on July 09, 2010, 06:23:23 AM
Maybe he passed out from exhaustion and dehydration.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: seeker_two on July 09, 2010, 07:29:07 AM
After that experience, I'd almost have preferred the feline variety.

Looks like we have another furrie coming out of the closet....  :facepalm:
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: MillCreek on July 09, 2010, 08:39:39 AM
I suspect he is referring to someone who attended Washington State University. 
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Jamisjockey on July 09, 2010, 08:59:55 AM
Don't make me ban you

(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.canadiandriver.com%2Fforum%2FSmileys%2FCarTalk%2Fttiwwop.gif&hash=6d2c6282d365bff67dd1f4a3c711f07e8ec5c55e)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Nick1911 on July 09, 2010, 09:32:10 AM
Maybe he mean the woman variety.   :-*
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: grampster on July 09, 2010, 09:44:19 AM
Duhhh! =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: TechMan on July 09, 2010, 09:47:05 AM
I agree with Jamis.  No pics or further details should result in a ban.  You are not kind.   =)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Harold Tuttle on July 09, 2010, 09:51:37 AM
(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpremium1.uploadit.org%2FdocZox%2F%2FcougarDNW.jpg&hash=b1a48fbc3abca1c97e35f08aef7a5f8e043a115a)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: AJ Dual on July 09, 2010, 10:13:58 AM
After that experience, I'd almost have preferred the feline variety.

There's a picture from "There's Something About Mary" I could post, but don't want the banswherk...
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Stickjockey on July 09, 2010, 10:25:18 AM
Come on, Sumpnz! Spill it!
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Northwoods on July 09, 2010, 11:26:19 AM
All right, here's the story.

I went to KAWO to help my buddy strip the paint off the the propeller on his C-170.  Not that he needed my help, he just knew I like to hang around the airplanes, and the plan was to get some brews afterwards.

We went to the bar that's just north of the airport as they had outside seating and we wanted to watch the planes come and go.  Not long after getting situated this woman approached us.  She was wearing a sun-dress which might have been good, but she was about 50# overweight, 40, and gravity had taken a definite toll.  Plus she had a tattoo on a boob that, 20 years and 50# ago might have been OK. 

We didn't want to be rude (early on my friend even poured some of our beer into her cup, just to be nice) but tried to make it increasingly clear through just not engaging her much, body language, etc that we didn't want to talk to her.  Both of us are married, happily, and it was obvious that she was looking for a horizontal rodeo.  And frankly, even I wasn't married, I wouldn't want to find out what she's incubating anyway.  I don't need to find out what it feel like to piss razor blades, you know.

Why she thought that flipping us off when we said something about a band we didn't care for that she seemed to like, gyrating next to us when we refused to look at her, and other similar behavior was going to get either of us to break our marriage vows is beyond me.  I mean, I know she was blitzed, but even booze can only excuse so much. 

We told her flat out that we happily married to our respective spouse and she didn't take the hint.  I showed her the photo of my 6 year old daughter and said flat out that my wife was her mother and she didn't take the hint.  Finally I lost my patience after probably an hour of this crap.  She told me to lean over close to her face.  I said no.  Repeat a couple times.  Finally I just said "F-k off, we don't want to talk to you."  That actually had to be repeated at least once before it succeeded in getting past the barrier of vodka. 

I thought that was the last of her.  But noooo.  She came back about 20 minutes later.  She tried to sit down again at our table.  She missed the chair.  I didn't even give her the courtesy this time of pretending to be polite.  I just told her "Neither of us are going to f-k you, we don't even want to talk to you.  If you want some to screw try that horseshoe post over there."  To which she responded "I don't want to screw you".  At this point she's still not getting up to leave.  So I finally got to her with "Or go find some place to sober up."  That one seemed to power through the haze of the vodka, and she got up and left.

The bartender came over a short time later to make sure we were OK and to let us know they'd cut her off.  Thankfully by the time we left to go our respective homes she was long gone.  I was half worried that we'd meet her again on the way to our trucks, but luckily we did not. 

Oh, and as to the request for pics.  I briefly though about taking a cell phone picture of her to document her craziness, but I figured that would just encourage her and changed my mind.  That and I didn't want to have to bleach or burn my phone.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: AZRedhawk44 on July 09, 2010, 11:32:02 AM
(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tvscoop.tv%2Fjanice%2520%282%29.jpg&hash=ebdb240e1569899b8ab2242bb4f358684f5ed79d)

(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F_OjrbRW6e1VE%2FSylEe3hl5TI%2FAAAAAAAADE0%2Fsj4IWhZccvk%2Fs400%2Fdebbisbress.jpg&hash=9aec5ab91143db5de6e5490b6729032890ba64d6)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Northwoods on July 09, 2010, 11:34:35 AM
^^^ That would have been an improvement.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Jamisjockey on July 09, 2010, 11:35:51 AM
Well hell, thats not a cougar as you describe it, thats just an old skank.  Cougars should at least look decent up to smoking hot.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Balog on July 09, 2010, 11:36:05 AM
I loves me some tattos, and I've never seen a boob/cleavage tattoo that looked good.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: seeker_two on July 09, 2010, 12:16:40 PM

All right, here's the story.

That wasn't a cougar....that was trailer trash that someone forgot to haul away....  [barf]

You may still need shots for sitting that close to her.....  [barf]  [barf]
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: MillCreek on July 09, 2010, 12:27:55 PM
But did you ask if she went to Wazzu?
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: BridgeRunner on July 09, 2010, 01:48:07 PM
I've seen a friend of mine get like that when she's seriously manic.  Drama tends to ensue.  No boob tats, though, thank god.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: AJ Dual on July 09, 2010, 01:57:07 PM
But then again, a boob-tat that says "¡spǝɯ ɹnoʎ ǝʞɐʇ" Might not be that hard of a sell her next manic phase...  :angel:
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: BridgeRunner on July 09, 2010, 02:00:51 PM
But then again, a boob-tat that says "¡spǝɯ ɹnoʎ ǝʞɐʇ" Might not be that hard of a sell her next manic phase...  :angel:

Indeed.  If only it were that simple...
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: AZRedhawk44 on July 09, 2010, 02:15:01 PM
Quote
¡spǝɯ ɹnoʎ ǝʞɐʇ

How you do that?  Is it a font that you type backwards?
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: 41magsnub on July 09, 2010, 02:20:43 PM
How you do that?  Is it a font that you type backwards?

What you do is turn your keyboard upside down.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Tallpine on July 09, 2010, 02:27:42 PM
This thread is worthless without pictures of the Cessna.  =D

I really have a thing for taildraggers  ;)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: TechMan on July 09, 2010, 02:47:59 PM
How you do that?  Is it a font that you type backwards?

¡sıɥʇ ǝʞıן ʇı op noʎ
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Marnoot on July 09, 2010, 02:50:04 PM
How you do that?  Is it a font that you type backwards?
http://www.fliptext.org/
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: charby on July 09, 2010, 02:55:54 PM
All right, here's the story.

Similar to a drunken snowmobile chick last winter with me, except she was a hot late 40's early 50's something and started to remove her clothes for me in the bar. He husband was pretty blitzed too and had the look of a fight in his eyes until her realized his wife was hammered and I wasn't enjoying her advances. To top it all off when we left the place she was outside warming up her sled and decided to hop off and climb into my truck with me. Took me a while to convince her that she belongs with her husband.

Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: BReilley on July 09, 2010, 03:50:51 PM
But then again, a boob-tat that says "¡spǝɯ ɹnoʎ ǝʞɐʇ" Might not be that hard of a sell her next manic phase...  :angel:

The computer I'm on can't figure that out, but I'm quite sure it's funny.  Can someone explain this for me?
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: TechMan on July 09, 2010, 03:55:27 PM
The computer I'm on can't figure that out, but I'm quite sure it's funny.  Can someone explain this for me?

The phrase is "take your meds!"
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: AJ Dual on July 09, 2010, 05:05:25 PM
What you do is turn your keyboard upside down.

Quit teasing him.

Fisty... set your regional options in the User CP/Profile to "Australia", then change it back when done.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: lee n. field on July 09, 2010, 05:31:06 PM
Quote
but she was about 50# overweight, 40, and gravity had taken a definite toll.

Hey!  Nothing wrong with 40.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: S. Williamson on July 09, 2010, 06:43:49 PM
Indeed.  A 24-year-old friend of mine has himself an actual cougar, a 43-year-old hottie.
 (http://i30.tinypic.com/2upfpqt.jpg) (Actually, the picture is from the first night they met--she had just come from some sort of costume party, he was just having a few drinks)
They make no excuses and have no illusions about what's going on, and they both have fun and enjoy themselves and each other.  I'm actually kinda jealous.  :-X

What you encountered was... well, not a cougar.  A walking regret, sounds like.  =(
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: BridgeRunner on July 09, 2010, 06:54:28 PM
My cousin's wife is twenty+ years older than him.  They started dating when he was twenty-five.  She is reasonably hot.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Perd Hapley on July 09, 2010, 06:58:07 PM
Quit teasing him.

Fisty... set your regional options in the User CP/Profile to "Australia", then change it back when done.


Not work.  Why not work?   =(
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Jamisjockey on July 09, 2010, 07:07:36 PM
(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpix.motivatedphotos.com%2F2009%2F6%2F12%2F633803901466044135-COUGAR.jpg&hash=5bbc0ecc050318faa14784155cafca3ed3ff58b2)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: seeker_two on July 09, 2010, 07:14:26 PM
My "cougar experience" (before the term "cougar" existed, IIRC) was with a psychiatrist at my first mental-health-related job in my early 20's....learned a whole lot from that experience....such as psychiatrists are often more screwed up than their patients....and that MD's can afford to take you to some very nice restaurants (my first & only experience with Ruth's Chris steaks)....and that experience is a very, very good thing....  =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Boomhauer on July 09, 2010, 07:22:45 PM
(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpix.motivatedphotos.com%2F2009%2F6%2F12%2F633803901466044135-COUGAR.jpg&hash=5bbc0ecc050318faa14784155cafca3ed3ff58b2)

I could uh, tolerate that. For sure...

Odd thing is that I seem to get along better with ah...older women than those that are my age or younger...



Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: MillCreek on July 09, 2010, 07:33:38 PM
The sad reality of cougars:
(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fverydemotivational.files.wordpress.com%2F2010%2F01%2F129088706912520914.jpg&hash=f0afed52ab6de96c51a535727a50cc656806ed3b)
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: freakazoid on July 09, 2010, 07:40:05 PM
Quote
Fisty... set your regional options in the User CP/Profile to "Australia", then change it back when done.

That should be made to actually work,  =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: lee n. field on July 09, 2010, 10:10:20 PM
I could uh, tolerate that. For sure...

Odd thing is that I seem to get along better with ah...older women than those that are my age or younger...


Older women tend to have more going on in their heads than the hot but vapid young cuties.  I noticed that when I was about 30.

"Tend to" -- it's not universal.  Some people just get older, they don't get wiser. 
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Boomhauer on July 09, 2010, 10:12:16 PM
Older women tend to have more going on in their heads than the hot but vapid young cuties.  I noticed that when I was about 30.

"Tend to" -- it's not universal.  Some people just get older, they don't get wiser. 

From observing my sisters and acquaintances...at 15 the brain departs the teenage girl...seems to maybe find it's way home at around 25-30 or so.

Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: RoadKingLarry on July 10, 2010, 12:41:08 AM
Hey!  Nothing wrong with 40.

Almost robbing the cradle for alot of us here.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Jim147 on July 10, 2010, 01:16:40 AM
She wasn't called a cougar then. I think I called her trouble.

This has been more then a couple of years back.

My wife was in Chicago and I was sitting around here on a day I just didn't have anything that needed doing. I'm sure I had work to do but I just wasn't in the mood. So I drove up to Kansas City to go to my favorite steakhouse. I liked to sit at the bar and bs with the bartender and enjoy a nice ribeye and a few drinks.

So this attractive lady about 10-15 years older then I am decides to sit down beside me and strike up a conversation. I'm not much of a talker. After about 30-45 minutes of talk about business and the economy I notice she just seems to be getting closer and closer. I'm already one drink past my normal limit (the bartender knows this and made me a weak one) so I decide to pay and head home. It took a few times to get through to her that I was leaving without her. So she gave me her business card. I just smiled when I looked at it and headed for home. She had the same last name as I did. :facepalm: I never found a direct relation before I got rid of her card, but I think we must have been related somewhere down the line.

jim

And then there is the reason I don't think I can ever go back to Oklahoma. But that another story. =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: MillCreek on July 10, 2010, 07:26:19 AM
A friend of mine once told me about his experience with the adult hookup websites.  He said that by far the largest group of women participating in the casual sex hookups via the websites were middle-aged chubby women.   I guess this must be your last resort when the bars no longer work.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: seeker_two on July 10, 2010, 10:30:17 AM

And then there is the reason I don't think I can ever go back to Oklahoma. But that another story. =D

Do tell....and you should feel blessed that you can't go to Oklahoma, too....  =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Ron on July 10, 2010, 10:38:28 AM
That wasn't a cougar, that was a wild boar.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: wmenorr67 on July 10, 2010, 10:54:15 AM
Do tell....and you should feel blessed that you can't go to Oklahoma, too....  =D

Hey there is nothing too wrong with Oklahoma.  But do tell also.  Plus there are places in the KC area I probably should stay away from.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Strings on July 10, 2010, 02:01:06 PM
>Hey there is nothing too wrong with Oklahoma<

Other than the Okies, you mean... :P
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: wmenorr67 on July 10, 2010, 02:53:40 PM
I'm not native to Oklahoma so I guess I don't fit that sterotype.  But right now with all the political BS going on here in Tulsa I wonder sometimes if I shouldn't look for a way out.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: seeker_two on July 10, 2010, 03:00:27 PM
Head due south....civilization awaits.....just don't go too far south....'cause Austin don't count....  =D
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: lupinus on July 10, 2010, 03:02:00 PM
>Hey there is nothing too wrong with Oklahoma<

Other than the Okies, you mean... :P
Depends.

Are they from Muskogee?
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: wmenorr67 on July 10, 2010, 03:13:30 PM
Head due south....civilization awaits.....just don't go too far south....'cause Austin don't count....  =D

Actually after getting back from Afghanistan sometime in 2012 then I might be looking for other pastures.  Going to look for different job then.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: RoadKingLarry on July 10, 2010, 05:42:45 PM
I'm not native to Oklahoma so I guess I don't fit that sterotype.  But right now with all the political BS going on here in Tulsa I wonder sometimes if I shouldn't look for a way out.

Tulsa and OKC are not the entire state. Us rural okies are constantly amused by the political antics in Tulsa. I don't pay as much attention to the goings on in OKC but I've heard they are nearly as clueless as Tulsa.
 
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: wmenorr67 on July 10, 2010, 07:18:58 PM
Well right now Tulsa is enough chuckles for the entire state.  OKC has the state government to laugh at more.
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Perd Hapley on July 10, 2010, 07:22:18 PM
Why are we laughing at Tulsa?  I thought we were all still laughing at Illinois.   ???
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Strings on July 11, 2010, 01:02:15 AM
Laughing at Illinois is the prototypical "low-hanging fruit"...
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: BobR on July 11, 2010, 01:47:23 AM
Quote
I suspect he is referring to someone who attended Washington State University.

Mom's weekend in Pullman, also known as the cougs and cougars weekend. If you are so inclined you could possibly stumble into a sportsman's double.  ;)

bob
Title: Re: Attacked by a Cougar
Post by: Jim147 on July 11, 2010, 02:03:36 AM
Depends.

Are they from Muskogee?

I stayed in Muskogee the last time I was in OK.
 
Do tell....and you should feel blessed that you can't go to Oklahoma, too....  =D

The only thing I'll ever say about it in any kind of a public place is that if I'd of been pulled over about anytime in the two days after leaving I had a good chance of being over the limit.

jim