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Author Topic: Fun with a telemarketeer!  (Read 1864 times)

Otherguy Overby

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« on: October 12, 2006, 06:44:43 AM »
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Guns
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280plus

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2006, 08:52:20 AM »
Yea, I heard that a couple days ago but couldn't find a link. Hilarious...
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Avoid cliches like the plague!

gunsmith

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2006, 09:59:22 AM »
that was great!
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Quote from: RevDisk on April 06, 2012, 10:15:08 AM
Politicians and bureaucrats are considered productive if they swarm the populace like a plague of locust, devouring all substance in their path and leaving a swath of destruction like a firestorm. The technical term is "bipartisanship".
Rocket Man: "The need for booster shots for the immunized has always been based on the science.  Political science, not medical science."

Larry Ashcraft

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2006, 10:57:38 AM »
I've got Tom Mabe's first CD.  He's hilarious.

"A carpet cleaning service?  Can you get blood out?  I mean, there's blood everywhere.  I'll pay double.  In cash!  Just don't call the police."
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Desertdog

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« Reply #4 on: October 12, 2006, 11:06:24 AM »
Yes, it is hilarious, but I am not going to waste my time doing something like that.

When I get a telemarketer call I have a semi-scripted reply that goes like this,
"I am sorry, but I do not respond  to any telephone solicitation.  Please put me on your do not call list".  Usually they reply an OK at which time I say "Thank you" and hang up.

I have had a few reply with, "May we send you a letter" and I the repeat my response with a little more force and hang up.

Why waste my time?
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Headless Thompson Gunner

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« Reply #5 on: October 12, 2006, 12:12:58 PM »
Heh.  I live in Indiana.  We don't have telemarketers in Indiana.  One of the few good things our state goverment has done, aside from lifetime CCW permits, is banish all telemarketers from the realm.
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charby

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #6 on: October 12, 2006, 12:15:42 PM »
Quote from: Desertdog
Yes, it is hilarious, but I am not going to waste my time doing something like that.

When I get a telemarketer call I have a semi-scripted reply that goes like this,
"I am sorry, but I do not respond  to any telephone solicitation.  Please put me on your do not call list".  Usually they reply an OK at which time I say "Thank you" and hang up.

I have had a few reply with, "May we send you a letter" and I the repeat my response with a little more force and hang up.

Why waste my time?
Part of selling is that every No gets you closer to a Yes. If telemarketing wasn't successful they wouldn't do it.

-C
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Iowa- 88% more livable that the rest of the US

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Art Eatman

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #7 on: October 12, 2006, 03:56:36 PM »
I like Byron Quick's "deal":   In his most rural Georgia accent, at the first pause, he asks, "Do you have a dawg?"  Regardless of their answer, he points out, "If you have a dawg, your stress won't be as bad.  It's real good for you to have a dawg."  And on and on and on.

After all, for these folks, time = money.

I usually ask where they're located.  Then I ask about the weather.  "Gettin' plenty of rain?"  And, at some point, "How's your mom'n'em?"

And then again I often just hang up.

Smiley, Art
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The American Indians learned what happens when you don't control immigration.

Tallpine

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« Reply #8 on: October 12, 2006, 05:01:10 PM »
For a while we were getting a bunch of calls from those mobile windshield repair outfits: "do you have a cracked or chipped windshield?"

(in Montana, ALL windshields are cracked or chipped, unless you are less than 20 minutes off the showroom floor)

I always wanted to reply: "Can you fix bullet holes in glass?"

them(presumably): "how big is the bullet hole?"

Me: "I dunno ... how big are the bullets that the FBI uses?"  Cheesy
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Freedom is a heavy load, a great and strange burden for the spirit to undertake. It is not easy. It is not a gift given, but a choice made, and the choice may be a hard one. The road goes upward toward the light; but the laden traveller may never reach the end of it.  - Ursula Le Guin

Strings

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #9 on: October 12, 2006, 06:53:39 PM »
My absolute favorite was a call I got at our first home. The wife and I were in our room, and the phone rings. At the time, I was "on call" for my job, so I HAD to answer... but didn't like being disturbed right then. So I pick up the phone:

me: "If you're selling something, I'm going to eat your heart"

Timid lil' female voice: "Hi sir... I'm with MCI, and I was wondering if I could interest you in our service"

Me: "WHERE ARE YOU?"

TLFV: "I'msorryI'llcallagainsomeothertime" *click*

Never DID hear back from MCI...
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grampster

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« Reply #10 on: October 12, 2006, 07:03:14 PM »
We have caller ID.  A quick glance at the Phone's display screen tells me whether I answer it or not.
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Brad Johnson

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« Reply #11 on: October 12, 2006, 07:08:47 PM »
Quote
We have caller ID.  A quick glance at the Phone's display screen tells me whether I answer it or not.
Caller ID? C'mon, where's your sense of adventure!?

Brad
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Perd Hapley

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« Reply #12 on: October 12, 2006, 07:13:08 PM »
Hunter Rose, you're a bad, scary man.
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Headless Thompson Gunner

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« Reply #13 on: October 12, 2006, 07:15:41 PM »
Quote from: Hunter Rose
My absolute favorite was a call I got at our first home. The wife and I were in our room, and the phone rings. At the time, I was "on call" for my job, so I HAD to answer... but didn't like being disturbed right then. So I pick up the phone:

me: "If you're selling something, I'm going to eat your heart"

Timid lil' female voice: "Hi sir... I'm with MCI, and I was wondering if I could interest you in our service"

Me: "WHERE ARE YOU?"

TLFV: "I'msorryI'llcallagainsomeothertime" *click*

Never DID hear back from MCI...
That's cool!
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CAnnoneer

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« Reply #14 on: October 12, 2006, 08:38:22 PM »
These tricks don't work very well in my area. Most messages are automated. For example, I've been called at least 20 times by a mortgage refinancing company. Same lady, same message, same tape. If I were certain it would not cost me anything, I'd leave the phone open for an hour or two. Let them pay for it. Hehehehehe.
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Desertdog

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« Reply #15 on: October 12, 2006, 08:50:10 PM »
Quote
These tricks don't work very well in my area. Most messages are automated. For example, I've been called at least 20 times by a mortgage refinancing company. Same lady, same message, same tape. If I were certain it would not cost me anything, I'd leave the phone open for an hour or two. Let them pay for it. Hehehehehe.
Have you registered your phone number with the
NATIONAL DO NOT CALL REGISTRY

https://www.donotcall.gov/default.aspx

If it is just a recording I just hang up.
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Fly320s

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« Reply #16 on: October 13, 2006, 04:04:47 AM »
My brother has some device on his phone that defeats the telemarketer's automated systems.  When he answers a phone call, an electronic beep is sounded on the line which is suppose to cause the automated dialer on the other end to disconnect.  Not sure if it works.
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Islamic sex dolls.  Do they blow themselves up?

Bogie

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Fun with a telemarketeer!
« Reply #17 on: October 17, 2006, 09:51:44 AM »
"Oh, goody... A time share vacation place sounds great. Will you spend some time in the hot tub with me?"

Works with either sex, if you sound weird enough.
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