Platform:
Gay marriage: It's cool that people are saying that they want to be partners for life. Don't make me watch, and PLEASE try to keep the loonies out of the Pride parade this year?
Marijuana legalization: Legalize it all - everything - and slap a use tax on it. That tax goes to education and rehabilitation. Distribute through either liquor stores or pharmacies. Get the meth labs out of the cheap motels, and into industry where the things will be safely regulated. But I suspect that use would drop off when the easy money goes away.
Abortion: If you do it, you live with it. I don't want to hear about it, or pay for it.
Gun control: Require firearms safety training in grade schools. While we're at it, let's also train the population on avoiding household poisons, stupid electrical tricks, show them pictures of nasty accidents, and keep them from staring at the sky with their mouths open while it is raining.
Immigration: Either do it right, or get deported. I have no problem with people who do it right - our population has been kicked out of most countries, and another few won't hurt.
Welfare: If someone doesn't want to work, cut them off, maybe send them to Mexico. If you're not smart enough to figure out how to use a lawn mower, then you can mop floors somewhere. Mops are good.
Middle east: Be nice and talk to the terrorists. That way we know where they are. Then the next time someone does something which harms an American, we kill them. On you tube.
Eliminate crop subsidies for "farm" outfits which hold more than 999 acres. And no, you're not going to get around this by having 23 different 999 acre companies.
Reform the prison system. It's a prison, and it should be run by the guards, not the inmates. No more buggery. Individual small cells. Video cameras everywhere. Shock collars on all inmates. Someone does something, it's zap time.
Oh, and put it in Death Valley, and pack it up and move it every week.
