While I sat in the reception area of my doctor's office, a woman rolled anelderly man in a wheelchair into the room. As she went to the receptionist'sdesk, the man sat there, alone and silent. Just as I was thinking I shouldmake small talk with him, a little boy slipped off his mother's lap andwalked over to the wheelchair. Placing his hand on the man's, he said, 'Iknow how you feel. My mom makes me ride in the stroller too.'.
________________________________
As I was nursing my baby, my cousin's six-year-old daughter, Krissy, cameinto the room. Never having seen anyone breast feed before, she wasintrigued and full of all kinds of questions about what I was doing.After mulling over my answers, she remarked, 'My mom has some of those, butI don't think she knows how to use them.'
________________________________
Out bicycling one day with my eight-year-old granddaughter, Carolyn, I got alittle wistful. 'In ten years,' I said,'you'll want to be with your friends and you won't go walking, biking, andswimming with me like you do now.' Carolyn shrugged.. 'In ten years you'llbe too old to do all those things anyway.' ________________________________
Working as a pediatric nurse, I had the difficult assignment of givingimmunization shots to children. One day I entered the examining room to givefour-year-old Lizzie her needle. 'No, no, no!' she screamed. 'Lizzie,'scolded her mother, 'that's not polite behavior.' With that, the girl yelledeven louder, 'No, thank you! No, thank you!
________________________________
My wife left the car unattended for only a minute, but it was long enoughfor our two-year-old to climb in, throw the car into reverse and crash intoa lamppost. He was fine, but the car wasn't, and I had a hard timeexplaining who was behind the wheel to the insurance company. After a pause,the adjuster asked, 'Do you let him drive often?'
________________________________
One afternoon while I was visiting my library, I noticed a group ofpreschoolers gathered for story time. The book they were reading was ThereWas an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly. After the librarian finished the firstpage, she asked the children, 'Do you think she'll die?' 'Nope,' a littlegirl in the back said. 'I saw this last night on Fear Factor.'
------------------------------------
My sister had been ill, so I called to see how she was doing. Myten-year-old niece answered the phone 'Hello,' shewhispered. 'Hi, honey. How's your mother?' I asked. 'She's sleeping,' sheanswered, again in a whisper. 'Did she go to the doctor?' I asked. 'Yes. Shegot some medicine,' my niece said softly. 'Well, don't wake her up. Justtell her I called. What are you doing, by the way?' Again in a soft whisper,she answered, 'Practicing my trumpet.'
-----------------------------------
On a brutally humid day, I walked past a miniature golf course and saw a dadfollowing three small children from hole to hole. 'Who's winning?' Ishouted. 'I am,' said one kid. 'Me,' said another. 'No, me,' yelled thethird. Sweat dripping down his face, the dad gasped, 'Their mother is.'
-----------------------------------
On the way back from a Cub Scout meeting, my grandson asked my son thequestion. 'Dad, I know that babies come from mommies' tummies, but how dothey get there in the first place?' he asked innocently. After my son hemmedand hawed awhile, my grandson finally spoke up in disgust. 'You don't haveto make something up, Dad. It's OK if youdon't know the answer.' ________________________________
Just before I was deployed to Iraq , I sat my eight-year-old son down andbroke the news to him. 'I'm going to be away for a long time,' I told him.'I'm going to Iraq ' 'Why?' he asked.. 'Don't you know there's a war goingon over there?' ________________________________
Even though the toddler was having a furious tantrum, his mom was unfazed.'You may as well give up on the crying,' I heard her say as she led him tothe store exit. 'You're stuck with me for 18 years.' ________________________________
Paul Newman founded the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp for children strickenwith cancer, AIDS and blood diseases. One afternoon he and his wife, JoanneWoodward, stopped by to have lunch with the kids. A counselor at a nearbytable, suspecting the young patients wouldn't know that Newman was a famousmovie star, explained, 'That's theman who made this camp possible. Maybe you've seen his picture on his saladdressing bottle?' Blank stares. 'Well, you've probably seen his face on hislemonade carton.' An eight-year-old girl perked up. 'How long was hemissing?'
________________________________
Like all growing boys, my teenage grandson, Jermon, was constantly hungry. Iwent to my refrigerator to find something he might like to eat. After pokingaround a bit and moving the milk and juice cartons, I spotted a bowl ofleftover chili. 'Hey, Jermon,' I called out excitedly. He came running intothe kitchen. 'Look! I found some chili.' Struggling to be polite, he said,'If you're that surprised, I'm not really sure I want it.'
________________________________
My last name is a mouthful, so when my three-year-old niece learned to spellit, I was thrilled, until my cousin burst my bubble. 'You can spellSczygelski any way you like,' he pointed out. 'Who's going to know if it'swrong?'
________________________________
For the first time, my four-year-old daughter Kelsey was coming to my officeto have me, a dental hygienist, clean her teeth. She was accompanied by hergrandmother. When they came in, I greeted them warmly, seated Kelsey and, asusual, put on my gloves, goggles and mask. About ten minutes into theprocedure, she got scared and cried, 'Iwant my mommy!' I quickly pulled off my mask and said, 'I am your mommy.'Without hesitating, my daughter yelled back, 'Then I want my granny!'
