Author Topic: Sneaky ass doctors (Read 2314 times)

lupinus · « **on:** August 18, 2007, 04:45:45 PM »

So I pulled my back out thursday and friday work made me go to the doctor. So I get some muscle relaxers and pain meds, good stuff all around.

Now tonight just out of curiosity I punch in the name of the muscle relaxers into ye old search engine as it's one I have never taken...hey I was bored.

I noticed this little gem-

Quote

What side effects can this medication cause? Return to top
Methocarbamol may cause side effects. Methocarbamol may cause your urine to turn black, blue, or green. However, this effect is harmless.

WTF!?! So I have been taking this stuff for a few doses now and you know, if I hadn't been bored and looked this up....pissing black would not be a harmless side effect. Thats the stuff heart attacks and panic attacks are made of. HARMLESS MY ass

I remember him mentioning drowsiness, dizzinessm, yadda yadda. Not once did that ahole mention my piss turning black blue or green....maybe he does it on purpose for his own sick amusment. Bastard did have a little smile as he wrote the script

Asshat

Sindawe · « **Reply #1 on:** August 18, 2007, 04:53:24 PM »

HEHEHEHHEEHE < insert evil chuckle>

Oh, by the way. It might make you piss in technocolor. Nothing to worry about....

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I forget to mention that?

Sounds like a physician after my own heart. <insert evil chuckle>

1982fxr · « **Reply #2 on:** August 18, 2007, 04:56:07 PM »

Yep, you got that right. And do you think they do the digital prostate exam for legitimate medical reasons? No, they do it to keep the patient in line. Ask too many pointed questions and *bam* suddenly they remember that you're due for a prostate check. "Drop 'em, bend over, grab the table."

And don't get me started on blood pressure; the AMA has dropped the threshold for "high" blood pressure so low that pretty much everyone over the age of 35 (who isn't a world-class endurance athlete) now has high blood pressure and therefore needs to be on a bucket of meds.

wooderson · « **Reply #3 on:** August 18, 2007, 05:01:46 PM »

Worst thing I ever did was 'watch the stream' halfway through my first experience with LSD. I was holding myself together pretty well until that point...

lupinus · « **Reply #4 on:** August 18, 2007, 05:06:01 PM »

I wanna see it change colors mid stream

The Rabbi · « **Reply #5 on:** August 18, 2007, 05:09:27 PM »

Oy.
As they say, a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.
Drug companies are required to list EVERY side effect ever reported in connection with their drug. It doesn't matter that 90+% of the people taking it never experience it, nor that some of the side effects could be attributable to other things. The company still has to list it.
It would take hours for a doc to list all of these. Almost all of them will be non-issue for the patient as he will never experience them. Having your urine change color, while a little disconcerting, is certainly not life threatening. The worst side effect is going to be another doctor's bill after a frantic call from some yayhoo.

RevDisk · « **Reply #6 on:** August 18, 2007, 05:31:36 PM »

Quote from: lupinus on August 18, 2007, 03:45:45 PM

WTF!?! So I have been taking this stuff for a few doses now and you know, if I hadn't been bored and looked this up....pissing black would not be a harmless side effect. Thats the stuff heart attacks and panic attacks are made of. HARMLESS MY ass

I remember him mentioning drowsiness, dizzinessm, yadda yadda. Not once did that ahole mention my piss turning black blue or green....maybe he does it on purpose for his own sick amusment. Bastard did have a little smile as he wrote the script

Asshat

If you ever want to mess with someone badly, chug a pint of food coloring about an hour and a half before a urinalysis. I don't recommend red, tho. Pissing red urine and attempting to 'scream' while laughing hysterically typically gets you a bunch of very large orderlies to escort you to the ER. Uh, not that I'd know.

cassandra and sara's daddy · « **Reply #7 on:** August 18, 2007, 05:58:10 PM »

methyltheylene blue in the punch is a great laugh

K Frame · « **Reply #8 on:** August 18, 2007, 09:11:29 PM »

Try to keep the cursing to a dull roar on the public side of the house, please...

Vile Nylons · « **Reply #9 on:** August 19, 2007, 05:47:34 AM »

I've used muscle relaxants a bunch of times and found they have been helpful. But I was aware that they are potent because my buddy's grandfather did a faceplant into a dish of sphaghetti while he was on them. No harm done, just funny. No doubt, depends upon which one's your taking.

After having negative affects from VIOXX I've gotten pretty careful about what I take.

grislyatoms · « **Reply #10 on:** August 19, 2007, 06:21:49 AM »

Last time I had a full physical, it wasn't my normal Sawbones but some other Doc. Young guy.

When he got done checking for a hernia and my prostate, I said "Sheesh, I feel like I should ask you out for a drink now."

His eyes got as big as saucers and he started stammering.

"I am kidding, you know."

His face turned crimson, and he hurried out of the room. To this day, he won't look me in the eye.

Oh, well, I gotta have some fun. grin

The Rabbi · « **Reply #11 on:** August 19, 2007, 06:45:07 AM »

Quote from: grislyatoms on August 19, 2007, 05:21:49 AM

Last time I had a full physical, it wasn't my normal Sawbones but some other Doc. Young guy.

When he got done checking for a hernia and my prostate, I said "Sheesh, I feel like I should ask you out for a drink now."

His eyes got as big as saucers and he started stammering.

"I am kidding, you know."

His face turned crimson, and he hurried out of the room. To this day, he won't look me in the eye.

Oh, well, I gotta have some fun. grin

The last time I got checked for hemorrhoids I told the doctor beforehand,
"You know, there are a lot of guys in Nashville that would pay me for this."
He answered he wasn't one of them.

K Frame · « **Reply #12 on:** August 19, 2007, 07:12:35 AM »

Last time I made a comment of a similar nature to my doctor I swear to go he used the dullest, bluntest needle he could find to give me my tetanus shot...

S. Williamson · « **Reply #13 on:** August 20, 2007, 08:31:59 PM »

Quote

If you ever want to mess with someone badly, chug a pint of food coloring about an hour and a half before a urinalysis. I don't recommend red, tho. Pissing red urine and attempting to 'scream' while laughing hysterically typically gets you a bunch of very large orderlies to escort you to the ER. Uh, not that I'd know.

RevDisk, you just made me laugh so hard that ever single person in the restaurant is staring at me. Families are bringing their kids into the section from across the establishment to point and gawk. grin

Sergeant Bob · « **Reply #14 on:** August 21, 2007, 05:04:55 AM »

Sneaky ass doctors

When I saw the thread title, all I could think of was a Proctologist who was sedating you and doing things behind your back. shocked

roo_ster · « **Reply #15 on:** August 21, 2007, 05:11:29 AM »

My dad & a college buddy, back in the days of "long trough" urinals, would chow down some substance that made their urine blue. Then, they'd stand at the high end of the urinal and let slip the azure stream for the wonderment of all along the trough.

Brad Johnson · « **Reply #16 on:** August 21, 2007, 02:42:55 PM »

If you ever have to give a stool sample, spend the night before chugging Shasta Blue Cream soda. The interesting neon green color is pretty much guaranteed to impress.

Brad

nico · « **Reply #17 on:** August 21, 2007, 04:06:25 PM »

Quote from: The Rabbi on August 19, 2007, 05:45:07 AM

The last time I got checked for hemorrhoids I told the doctor beforehand,
"You know, there are a lot of guys in Nashville that would pay me for this."
He answered he wasn't one of them.

heh, here's one from the other side: My dad (a dentist) had a patient who was real obnoxious tell him how much she hates going to the dentist and how she'd rather go to the gynecologist. His reply: "well turn over, we can do that too"

Hawkmoon · « **Reply #18 on:** August 21, 2007, 06:25:15 PM »

The medical schools are woefully deficient at teaching future doctors the concept of "informed consent."

I've been under treatment for a chronic skin condition for some time now. They have a name for the condition, but they don't really know what causes it so they also don't really know what to use to treat it. So they keep trying different medications.

One of the more recent prescriptions had a name that sounded vaguely like an antibiotic I had heard of, so I went ahead and filled the prescription. But something just wasn't right, so I looked it up on the Internet. Wonder of wonders, it wasn't an antibiotic at all -- it was a psychotropic. And it had a whole bunch of side effects, none of which the doctors had bothered to mention to me.

I called up, told them I wasn't taking the medicine, and reamed them a new orifice for giving me a psychotropic without my express knowledge and consent. I also demanded that they put a note in my file that they are NEVER to prescribe a psychotropic for me ever again. I'm due for a checkup on Friday, and I intend to ask my primary care doc to show me where that note is in the file. If it's not there -- I go directly from the doctor's office to the director of the hospital.

280plus · « **Reply #19 on:** August 22, 2007, 12:59:48 AM »

280 after his first prostate exam, "Why doctor, I feel we know each other so much better now!"

Doctor, " rolleyes

"

GigaBuist · « **Reply #20 on:** August 22, 2007, 06:17:56 AM »

Quote from: 1982fxr on August 18, 2007, 03:56:07 PM

Ask too many pointed questions and *bam* suddenly they remember that you're due for a prostate check. "Drop 'em, bend over, grab the table."

You could just tell them no.

Bogie · « **Reply #21 on:** August 22, 2007, 07:46:09 AM »

Psychotropic? No discussion of why?

He probably wrote a mistake. They do that. Constantly.

What do you call the guy who graduates last from his class in med school?

Doctor.

Excessive grape kool-ade turns everything green.

K Frame · « **Reply #22 on:** August 22, 2007, 08:34:00 AM »

What was the drug, Hawk?

There are a LOT of drug that come under the heading of psychotropics, from analgesics to anti-depressants.

Strings · « **Reply #23 on:** August 22, 2007, 01:43:12 PM »

I still remember a friend of mine, in the hospital for kidney stones. Other than that, he was healthy as the proverbial horse. Woke up his first night to a nurse getting ready to inject something in his IV. When asked, she said "oh... it's your heart medication!"

She was adamant about injecting it until he explained that if she tried to stick the needle into his IV, he'd take it away and insert it somewhere else...

Harold Tuttle · « **Reply #24 on:** August 23, 2007, 04:17:54 AM »

my current favorite is the ad for the "new" anti restless leg syndrom drug

one side effect is compulsive gambling!

it seems the Dopamine release might get you into a risky behaviour cycle

http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/62623.php

seen this?
http://www.resource4defectivedrugs.com/index.html

News:

Author Topic: Sneaky ass doctors (Read 2314 times)

cassandra and sara's daddy

Vile Nylons

Strings