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I guess the surrender jokes work, here...
Pirates Seize Control of French Cruise Ship Off Coast of Somalia
Friday , April 04, 2008
PARIS
Pirates seized control of a French cruise ship Friday off the coast of Somalia, France's Foreign Ministry said.
A ministry official said details about the attack were scarce, and it was not clear how many crew members were on board the ship or if there were any passengers.
The ship is in the high seas in the Gulf of Aden, off the coast of Somalia in the Indian Ocean.
The official declined to identify the vessel or its owner.
The ministry has set up a crisis center to deal with the situation, said the official, who asked not to be named because he was not authorized to discuss the matter publicly.
Pirates seized more than two dozen ships off the Somali coast last year.
The U.S. Navy has led international patrols to try to combat piracy in the region. Last year, the guided missile destroyer USS Porter opened fire to destroy pirate skiffs tied to a Japanese tanker.
Wracked by more than a decade of violence and anarchy, Somalia does not have its own navy and a transitional government formed in 2004 with U.N. help has struggled to assert control.
The International Maritime Bureau, which tracks piracy, said in its annual report earlier this year that global pirate attacks rose by 10 percent in 2007, marking the first increase in three years.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,346449,00.html
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And, not surprisingly, it's discouraged for crews to be armed. Heck, I bet even a cruise ship could have something nasty hidden away just for those circumstanses...
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If there were a decent enough bounty, I'd look into rigging up a Q ship myself...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q_ship
Imagine their faces when approaching a big luxury yacht only to see the deckhands pull the tarps off a few M2's and a bofors gun.
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If there were a decent enough bounty, I'd look into rigging up a Q ship myself...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q_shipImagine their faces when approaching a big luxury yacht only to see the deckhands pull the tarps off a few M2's and a bofors gun.
I'm in, as long as I get Ma Deuce!
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If there were a decent enough bounty, I'd look into rigging up a Q ship myself...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q_shipImagine their faces when approaching a big luxury yacht only to see the deckhands pull the tarps off a few M2's and a bofors gun.
I'm in! I don't have any training on military hardware, but I'm sure I could figure out how to run a Ma Deuce .
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I GET THE BOFORS!!!!!
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[crappy French accent]
"Mon Ami, for anniversary, can ve go on zee ocean cruize? Eet voud be SO romantic"
"Mon Cheri, but of course . . . shall ve go to, say, Somalia?"
"Fantastique! I haf alvays vonted to see the lovely Somali coast!"[/crappy French accent]
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And, not surprisingly, it's discouraged for crews to be armed. Heck, I bet even a cruise ship could have something nasty hidden away just for those circumstanses...
In many ports and waters its illegal. Maritime law frowns upon it from what I understand as well.
Watched an interesting show on History on it, not too long ago, where some companies are using blackwater type contractors to protect more sensitive cargoes through riskier waters, though.
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I do have to imagine the "oh s$@#!" reaction from the pirates though when a seemingly innocent vessel pops up a Bofors. Lessee. Pirates, armed with AK variants and maybe RPG-7's. Seemingly Innocent Vessel, armed with a Bofors and a sprinkling of Ma-Deuces.
Hrm. RPG-7, max range is ~900 meters... Bofors, max range... ~7000 meters... And that's in an anti-aircraft attitude. Used as a surface to surface weapon, somewhat longer range..... Warn the pirates away with a couple of bursts from the .50's, and if that doesn't work, open up with the Bofors.... Bet ya the pirate problem would rapidly disappear.....
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Warn the pirates away with a couple of bursts from the .50's, and if that doesn't work, open up with the Bofors.... Bet ya the pirate problem would rapidly disappear.....
Nah. Take out all the boats but one at distance. Hose on that one a bit (maybe with tracers) but leave the helm intact, so they can limp home and warn the other pirates that it's not worth it.
THAT would end the problem.
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works for me
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Actually, a "reproduction" carronade would be remarkably effective against small vessels with a grapeshot load. Those would be legal, right?
It's just decor, normally. But throw in a few pounds of powder and a cannister of bearings...
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sink these guys too
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I case you are wondering what their pirate ship is....
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And, not surprisingly, it's discouraged for crews to be armed. Heck, I bet even a cruise ship could have something nasty hidden away just for those circumstanses...
In many ports and waters its illegal. Maritime law frowns upon it from what I understand as well.
Watched an interesting show on History on it, not too long ago, where some companies are using blackwater type contractors to protect more sensitive cargoes through riskier waters, though.
Well, I figure the laws won't change without pressure from various special interest groups, such as lets say, shipping companies...
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I case you are wondering what their pirate ship is....
Oh, wouldnt it be absolutly hilarious to blow that floating piece of crap out of the water? Especially if they aren't prepared for it...
Didn't the US Navy do something like that a few years back? Somali pirates start shooting at US Navy, gets blown out of water, straight to hell?
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Just give me a letter of marque and $250,000.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letter_of_marque
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sink these guys too
I'd deep six those guys pro-bono.
APS privateers on a pirate hunting expedition to the gulf of Aden on a luxury yacht with more crew served goodness than yer average WW2 destroyer. Pyrat rum, Titos vodka, and Beltfeds. We gotta pencil this in as an APS meetup!
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I'm so in.
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sink these guys too
I'd deep six those guys pro-bono.
APS privateers on a pirate hunting expedition to the gulf of Aden on a luxury yacht with more crew served goodness than yer average WW2 destroyer. Pyrat rum, Titos vodka, and Beltfeds. We gotta pencil this in as an APS meetup!
where do we sign up?
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APSers and guns and booze?
We're gonna need a bigger boat.
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What if we converted one of your 320s into a gun ship instead?
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Fine by me. I'm sure we can duct tape pontoons on to it.
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I case you are wondering what their pirate ship is....
Ok...an RPG, a rifle or two...and a big piece of driftwood? wtf?
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I think the firehoses are probably the best bet-wouldn't be too hard to sink one of these guys by waterlogging them.
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Back on page 1, Ambulancedriver said:
I GET THE BOFORS!!!!!
Dude, it takes at least three to run one of those, iirc.
Ya want traverse, elevation, or loader?
POMPOMPOM
Pirates? What pirates?
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Range is the issue, the pirates can fire from outside hose range and kill the crew manning them. Especially with an overwatch boat.
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I'd deep six those guys pro-bono.
APS privateers on a pirate hunting expedition to the gulf of Aden on a luxury yacht with more crew served goodness than yer average WW2 destroyer. Pyrat rum, Titos vodka, and Beltfeds. We gotta pencil this in as an APS meetup!
Does this mean we'll have to take time out from clubbing baby seals?
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Play dumb, and dead. Let them come right in, then let them have it. A half a dozen troopers with small arms - use the Bofors and .50 to deal with any standoff targets.
Any private ship owners reading this I am for hire - resume, papers to back it up, and good references on request.
----------------------------------
http://searchronpaul.com
http://ussliberty.org/oldindex.html
http://www.gtr5.com
http://ssunitedstates.org
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I'd deep six those guys pro-bono.
APS privateers on a pirate hunting expedition to the gulf of Aden on a luxury yacht with more crew served goodness than yer average WW2 destroyer. Pyrat rum, Titos vodka, and Beltfeds. We gotta pencil this in as an APS meetup!
Does this mean we'll have to take time out from clubbing baby seals?
surely theres got to be some cute, helpless wildlife on the coast of Somalia we can bludgeon...
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I'd deep six those guys pro-bono.
APS privateers on a pirate hunting expedition to the gulf of Aden on a luxury yacht with more crew served goodness than yer average WW2 destroyer. Pyrat rum, Titos vodka, and Beltfeds. We gotta pencil this in as an APS meetup!
Does this mean we'll have to take time out from clubbing baby seals?
surely theres got to be some cute, helpless wildlife on the coast of Somalia we can bludgeon...
You people are sick. Absolutely sick. Count me in.
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Didn't the US Navy do something like that a few years back? Somali pirates start shooting at US Navy, gets blown out of water, straight to hell?
We persued and destroyed a few pirate ships just a few month ago. dont recall the details. It does happen on occasion, but its fairly rare. The pirates dont mess with Navy ships,obviously, or screw around when they know we are nearby, but on occasion, we are closer than they realize, or think we won't/can't do anything, and it happens.
AT3 USN 2001-2006
USS Nimitz
USS Enterprise
USS Roseveldt
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Pirates Seize Control of French Cruise Ship Off Coast of Somalia
As despicable as piratism is, I think if you're going to sail a cruise ship--loaded with Europeans whose weekly garbage would feed a Darfur family for a month-- off the shore of the most lawless nation (if that term even applies to Somalia) in the world, then you are asking for it. Begging, even.
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Hyarr...
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Does this mean we'll have to take time out from clubbing baby seals?
Sergeant Bob, we're just going to get a few pirates and greenpeacers on the way there.
IIRC weren't ye olde merchant ships back in the days of pirates armed with cannons themselves to fight off pirates ??
The pirates dont mess with Navy ships, obviously, or screw around when they know we are nearby
Hmmmmmm, wonder why ??
We're gonna need a bigger boat.
Didn't they just decommission the Kennedy ?? With Fly320s, Leatherneck and Gewehr98 we have the start of an Airwing. But I think one of the Iowa class BB's would be more fun.
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Always wanted to carrier launch a B-52H...
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I think the firehoses are probably the best bet-wouldn't be too hard to sink one of these guys by waterlogging them.
Or...
We could just kill the murdering bastards.
And it'd be a lot more fun. With pretty, pretty explosions. And roasted pirate.
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What if we converted one of your 320s into a gun ship instead?
An AC-320?? <ROFL>
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Always wanted to carrier launch a B-52H...
Heh, shades of the Doolittle raids....
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The International Maritime Bureau, which tracks piracy, said in its annual report earlier this year that global pirate attacks rose by 10 percent in 2007, marking the first increase in three years.
Hey, didn't they recently start saying that global temperatures had not been increasing lately?
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Didn't they just decommission the Kennedy ?? With Fly320s, Leatherneck and Gewehr98 we have the start of an Airwing. But I think one of the Iowa class BB's would be more fun.
I'll be the mechanic, who:
1) is always dirty
2) sometimes tipsy
3) has a cheesy pirate-ish accent
4) reminisces about wars he was never in
5) has a tendency to install big red buttons in the cockpit without exactly telling the pilots what they do
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I'd be perfectly satisfied purchasing one of the few remaining Elco 80' PT boats and restoring it. I'm sure there's an M4 37mm cannon still lying around in Russia from the P-39 Airacobras we gave them after WWII.
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But I think one of the Iowa class BB's would be more fun.
Yep, I like to see a couple of pirates clinging to the splinters of what's left of their boat saying to one another "Where the heck did that come from ??" and "Man, that was loud !!"
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I'll be the mechanic, who:
5) has a tendency to install big red buttons in the cockpit without exactly telling the pilots what they do
So you're the one!
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I'd be OK with a perch in the crow's nest and a rifle.....
....a .50BMG Barrett rifle, that is.....
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Soooo, you want to rescue and refit a warship Eh?
http://www.bozair.com/adamsmen/DDG2.html
I'm sure we could squeeze enough good kinds of armament on her to make everybody happy.
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It'll be cheaper on gas than a BB.
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Aaaargh!
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We even got a Viking on the crew, I'd say we're ready!
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We even got a Viking on the crew, I'd say we're ready!
I wonder how a modern longboat would look like...ah well, as long as there is a dragons head mounted on the front of it .
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Perhaps something like this...
http://goireland.about.com/od/dublincityandcounty/ig/Havhingsten-fra-Glendalough/
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I was thinking more along the lines of "how would a modern viking travel around?". IOW, a modern ship that still would have people recognising it as a viking longboat, and suddenly think "oh crap this aint good...".
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I was thinking more along the lines of "how would a modern viking travel around?". IOW, a modern ship that still would have people recognising it as a viking longboat, and suddenly think "oh crap this aint good...".
Figurehead, jet-black lower hull, crimson superstructure, and a distinctive banner flying?
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I was thinking more along the lines of "how would a modern viking travel around?". IOW, a modern ship that still would have people recognising it as a viking longboat, and suddenly think "oh crap this aint good...".
Figurehead, jet-black lower hull, crimson superstructure, and a distinctive banner flying?
Sounds like a plan. Decorative shields can be welded to the hull as well .
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I'd be perfectly satisfied purchasing one of the few remaining Elco 80' PT boats and restoring it. I'm sure there's an M4 37mm cannon still lying around in Russia from the P-39 Airacobras we gave them after WWII.
This ought to do it. The picture was taken in June, 2006, so she doesn't need a lot of work. I wonder if they would let us borrow her for an APS getaway holiday?
http://www.savetheptboatinc.com/index.htm
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Works for me, I'm not fussy...
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We even got a Viking on the crew, I'd say we're ready!
I wonder how a modern longboat would look like...ah well, as long as there is a dragons head mounted on the front of it
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Ironically enough they used to paint dragon or "battle" eyes on the bows of those particular ships during VN which was their heyday, I may be able to find a pic. I know the one I was on had them and they had to paint them over before Hong Kong would let them enter the harbor.
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Nope, no pic...
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Why wouldn't they let you into the harbour with that paintjob?
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Just a PC thing I guess...
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This ought to do it. The picture was taken in June, 2006, so she doesn't need a lot of work. I wonder if they would let us borrow her for an APS getaway holiday?
Oh so beautiful.
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Some mounted Ma Deuces, some mounted MK19's, a jolly roger flying high.....
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I gotta watch Master and Commander again tonight.
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Just a PC thing I guess...
That doesn't make sense...traditional Chinese junks did (and still do) have eyes painted on the bow so the boat can, in superstition, find its way through waterways and see any dangerous things and avoid them.
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I don't know, you'll have to go back to the people running HK ~ 1969 (I think) and ask them...
These were supposed to bring good luck in battle ad I think the relationship to war is what caused the problems. That's what I gathered from the story when I heard it. I wasn't there.
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I have no military experience and I get seasick easy but I want in too!
I'll run a Nordenfelt, to bring some old school karma to the proceedings.
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a jolly roger flying high...
Crap, now I have to tell you all about how I actually DID sail under the Jolly Roger...
Now this is a no shitter...
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a jolly roger flying high...
Crap, now I have to tell you all about how I actually DID sail under the Jolly Roger...
Now this is a no shitter...
I flew under a Jolly Roger once.....
(not my pic)
VMGR-352, IE Raiders, fly the jolly roger from thier C130's when they're on the deck.
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Well I'll be...
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I was thinking more along the lines of "how would a modern viking travel around?". IOW, a modern ship that still would have people recognising it as a viking longboat, and suddenly think "oh crap this aint good...".
Figurehead, jet-black lower hull, crimson superstructure, and a distinctive banner flying?
Stealth boat.....I call shotgun.....
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Through a friend I got to see the mechanical drawings on that thing. Very cool. It's compartmented below the waterline in such a fashion that it takes a big hit to cause any real effect on the buoyancy of the respective pontoon. It takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.
I told him I'd join back up if he could guarantee me that one for a duty station. he thought that was pretty funny.
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Through a friend I got to see the mechanical drawings on that thing. Very cool. It's compartmented below the waterline in such a fashion that it takes a big hit to cause any real effect on the buoyancy of the respective pontoon. It takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.
I told him I'd join back up if he could guarantee me that one for a duty station. he thought that was pretty funny.
What if an explodey jihad raft went underneath and fired some sort of shaped charge or RPG straight up?
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I say let's nuke 'em from orbit. It's the only way to be sure!
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I say let's nuke 'em from orbit. It's the only way to be sure!
That's not as fun as blowing them out of the water with a Bofors and some .50's...
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This is what they used to do!
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://docs.law.gwu.edu/facweb/dclarke/public/punishments/3.jpg&imgrefurl=http://docs.law.gwu.edu/facweb/dclarke/public/punishments/index.html&h=123&w=81&sz=37&tbnid=gT_lWIrQRn4J:&tbnh=123&tbnw=81&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbeheaded%2Bpirates%2Bpictures&sa=X&oi=image_result&resnum=1&ct=image&cd=1
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We once invaded North Africa to kick some pirate ass.
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What if an explodey jihad raft went underneath and fired some sort of shaped charge or RPG straight up?
Excellent question! I don't know.
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That first pic of the beheaded Pirates. Taken May 11th, 1891 in Kowloon. May 11 is my B'day and I've been to Kowloon! What does it all mean!?!
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That first pic of the beheaded Pirates. Taken May 11th, 1891 in Kowloon. May 11 is my B'day and I've been to Kowloon! What does it all mean!?!
Means that you are a reincarnated pirate?
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Whoever took that picture sucks! They cut the guys head off!
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Means that you are a reincarnated pirate?
That would explain my penchant for rum early on...
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So can we have "Ride Captain Ride" as our offical song when shelling pirates?
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http://video.aol.com/video-detail/uss-kitty-hawk-big-wave/2148746610
Rrrrrr, batten down the hatches...
Remember, the flight deck is about 60 feet above the water.
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Dramamine is now being served on the mess decks...
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There was an Edwardian liner, German I believe, that got slammed pretty good by a wave it plowed into. The guy up in the crow's nest 50 feet up got nearly taken out, and the bridge was shoved backwards two feet.
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What if an explodey jihad raft went underneath and fired some sort of shaped charge or RPG straight up?
Excellent question! I don't know.
Seriously....are we going to let them get THAT close?......
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Whoever took that picture sucks! They cut the guys head off!
Oh, way off topic but, I really like how the forum software now puts a scroll bar on any post which contains a link measuring 2 or 3 pages across, instead of having to scroll the whole page back and forth to read every post.
So can we have "Ride Captain Ride" as our official song when shelling pirates?
Ah yes, Blues Image. Yes, we can call our ship the "Golden Hind".
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You guys shoulda been with me when they offloaded us in San Diego and towed us to Long Beach in heavy seas. The ship sits real high with no fuel or ammo. About 2/3 of the crew was new because we had just come back from the Western Pacific and that's what usually happens, everybody leaves and new folk come on board. Anyways, what a PUKEFEST!
It was so bad there was barf sloshing back and forth everywhere you looked.
Not me though, I never did get seasick.
I still head for the bow when I go out on fishing boats and ferrys.
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I'm just amazed at the shudder the Kitty does when she takes that first wave. Smaller ships will do that but I never thought a carrier would. It takes a pretty awesome amount of force to make a carrier shudder. Big as it is, it's still just a speck compared to the ocean.
My favorite saying, "You see all that water? That's only the top."
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I'm just amazed at the shudder the Kitty does when she takes that first wave. Smaller ships will do that but I never thought a carrier would. It takes a pretty awesome amount of force to make a carrier shudder. Big as it is, it's still just a speck compared to the ocean.
My favorite saying, "You see all that water? That's only the top."
Oncoming storms at sea make you feel like an ant no matter what size vessel you're on.
I don't get seasick, either...I think feeling the roll of the deck is fun, actually.
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"HARD TO STARBOARD!!"
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Always wanted to carrier launch a B-52H...
B-25, B-52...we'll make it work.
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Always wanted to carrier launch a B-52H...
B-25, B-52...we'll make it work.
JATO Squared, anyone?
Or even RATO.....
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I require a Gatling gun and a daily ration of Bourbon. I will refuse to wear Navy dungarees but opt for khaki shorts and Hawaiian shirt.
We also need the singing guy off of The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou.
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So are we doing this thing or what? I update my signature for it even!
Also, I join with Charby in uniform choice.
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So are we doing this thing or what? I update my signature for it even!
Also, I join with Charby in uniform choice.
Someone needs to get Matthew Lesko's book and write a grant for our project.
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Ugh, I hate Matthew Lesko.
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Ah yes, Blues Image.
Yes, we can call our ship the "Golden Hind".
I will not sail on a ship named after some old Limey vessel. I vote to call our ship "The Strawberry Bitch"
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Hey, wait a minute, my Mom's birthday is also May 11th! I'll have to ask her if she's ever been to Kowloon . . .
Or maybe not.
You guys shoulda been with me when they offloaded us in San Diego and towed us to Long Beach in heavy seas. The ship sits real high with no fuel or ammo. About 2/3 of the crew was new because we had just come back from the Western Pacific and that's what usually happens, everybody leaves and new folk come on board. Anyways, what a PUKEFEST!
My Dad told me about riding out a typhoon on a Liberty Ship during WWII . . . he said a lot of the sailors were getting seasick, and couldn't stand it that one of their Army Air Corps passengers was walking around munching on things like salami sandwiches and garlic dill pickles . . .
Get a Letter of Marque, and I'm in on the pirate hunt.
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I will not sail on a ship named after some old Limey vessel. I vote to call our ship "The Strawberry Bitch"
I think it should be named "Fistful's Fault".
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I will not sail on a ship named after some old Limey vessel. I vote to call our ship "The Strawberry Bitch"
I think it should be named "
Fistful's Fault".
Just doesn't look right
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Fistfull's fault.... Pure, distilled win.
If I ever get a boat, I'm naming it that. Promise.
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How about something like this? Better living quarters, plenty of room on deck for guns and beer kegs.
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Just call it the "OH SH*T", since that's what you'd want the people it's after to say, anyway...
Also, I found the PERFECT boat! And it's for sale! Well, it was. For only about $400,000 US, too.
This Abeking & Rasmussen Teak hulled mine sweeper, built for the German Navy in 1960, was designed for speed, fuel efficiency and performance and to handle the most adverse sea conditions.
Length Overall 154ft 47m
Beam 26ft 3ins 8m
Draft 6ft 1.8m
Air Draft 19ft 8ins 6m
She offers up to 40 berths (some a bit cramped!) and would be ideal for conversion into a luxury motor yacht
http://easternyachts.com/schutze/
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Fistfull's fault.... Pure, distilled win.
If I ever get a boat, I'm naming it that. Promise.
here you go...
http://desmoines.craigslist.org/boa/633537848.html
I'm kind of tempted to buy it because I have a 40HP Mercury outboard sitting around.
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Just call it the "OH SH*T", since that's what you'd want the people it's after to say, anyway...
Also, I found the PERFECT boat! And it's for sale! Well, it was. For only about $400,000 US, too.
This Abeking & Rasmussen Teak hulled mine sweeper, built for the German Navy in 1960, was designed for speed, fuel efficiency and performance and to handle the most adverse sea conditions.
Length Overall 154ft 47m
Beam 26ft 3ins 8m
Draft 6ft 1.8m
Air Draft 19ft 8ins 6m
She offers up to 40 berths (some a bit cramped!) and would be ideal for conversion into a luxury motor yacht
http://easternyachts.com/schutze/
If you look at the name of the boat, it's the damn perfect boat for what we are proposing!
The word can also be used in German to mean "shooter" or "rifleman".
I can just picture that boat bristling with guns and pissed (in the British slang) APS pirate hunters....
Heck, we could go to the major shipping companies with a business proposal. X amount a year from each company to patrol the waters off the coast of (insert current problem country) and hunt pirates....
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Guns, alcohol and boating don't mix.
We'll have to take shifts.
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Ten guys times $40k each is all it would take; unfortunately I could only squeeze together half of that right now.
These fantasies are fun, but I fear in reality our efforts would go unappreciated by the world's Navies.
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Hey, if we're down there on a pleasure cruise and we just happen to keep getting attacked by pirates and just happen to be heavily armed, what can they say?
That said, I doubt the missus would let me go...
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Hey, if we're down there on a pleasure cruise and we just happen to keep getting attacked by pirates and just happen to be heavily armed, what can they say?
Navy guy - "You've been attacked 3 times just this week! How do you explain that gentlemen?"
APS crew - silently point to name on bow in unison
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Hey, if we're down there on a pleasure cruise and we just happen to keep getting attacked by pirates and just happen to be heavily armed, what can they say?
Navy guy - "You've been attacked 3 times just this
week! How do you explain that gentlemen?"
APS crew - silently point to name on bow in unison
YES! Win!!!
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I'd be perfectly satisfied purchasing one of the few remaining Elco 80' PT boats and restoring it. I'm sure there's an M4 37mm cannon still lying around in Russia from the P-39 Airacobras we gave them after WWII.
SARCO has one for sale for $5K.
Oldsmobile M9 37mm Cannon - receiver demilled, rest of gun is intact. Probably one of a kind. For use on M15 half track or Bell Aero Cobra Fighter. Also mounted as deck guns on PT boats... $5000.00
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I will consent to my screen name as a title for this boat, but only if my expenses are paid during the voyage, including ammo. And I demand adequate range time with every gun on board, too.
Of course, "Scapegoat" sounds better, but bear in mind I have also used that screen name, so the terms will be the same.
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We'll see what we can do...
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Figured it out. You outfit yourselves and then sell two week "vacations" to rich quasi adventurers who want to go out and fight pirates. You take maybe 2 at a time for some ungodly amount of money so there isn't too many FNGs at once. Of course, if they get killed or wounded, it ain't your problem...
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Figured it out. You outfit yourselves and then sell two week "vacations" to rich quasi adventurers who want to go out and fight pirates. You take maybe 2 at a time for some ungodly amount of money so there isn't too many NFGs at once. Of course, if they get killed or wounded, it ain't your problem...
You think our APS lawyer members could draft the liability release for that?.....
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"Boating accident"
"Windsurfing accident"
"Diving accident"
"Fell overboard during a vigorous shuffleboard game and was eaten by sharks accident"
What special liability?
That French cruise probably didn't require any.
"Horn of Africa Skeet Week Adventures"
Sounds safe as houses.
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Sure, why not, I'd think it'd be an average release form. You sign one at yopur local equestrian center. "I understand what I'm doing is dangerous and if I get hurt it's my fault and no one else's." See, what's so hard about that? Now, collecting on the life insurance...
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Don't need life insurance. Spouse of the deceased APS pirate hunter is entitled to his share of the Pirate Booty we capture. So hopefully we'll be capturing a lot.
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Don't need life insurance. Spouse of the deceased APS pirate hunter is entitled to his share of the Pirate Booty we capture. So hopefully we'll be capturing a lot.
What do the pirates have, though? A few banged-up AKs and an RPG-7 in a launch held together with duct tape? They probably have khat, but nobody wants that.
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Damn it. You're right, we'll be chasing poor Somali pirates, not cool rich movie pirates. OK, I'm out
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Yea, but the paying crew members will be rich anyways. What do they care about life insurance?
We could run ads in SOF, "Vacation tour! Battle pirates off the Somalia coast. The adventure of a lifetime!" $25,000 per week, per person.
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Yea, but the paying crew members will be rich anyways. What do they care about life insurance?
We could run ads in SOF, "Vacation tour! Battle pirates off the Somalia coast. The adventure of a lifetime!" $25,000 per week, per person.
Maybe we could get shipping companies to pay a reward/bounty on each head brought in for inspection, and extra money for videoclips showing pirate boats getting blown out of the water in an extra spectacular way?
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"What do the pirates have, though? A few banged-up AKs and an RPG-7 in a launch held together with duct tape?" And we will be sinking that!
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The trick is to hit them going home from a raid. Whatever we capture is ours under the laws of the sea.
Yarrr!
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The trick is to hit them going home from a raid. Whatever we capture is ours under the laws of the sea.
Wouldn't that make the entire point of hunting pirates for the shipping companies and cruise lines moot?.....
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True.
Got caught up in the moment I guess, lost sight of the big picture.
yar
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Whoops, yea, that happens.
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The trick is to hit them going home from a raid. Whatever we capture is ours under the laws of the sea.
Wouldn't that make the entire point of hunting pirates for the shipping companies and cruise lines moot?.....
"We couldn't get there quick enough! But we made sure they wouldn't be doing it again!"
The Viking, nice idea. How about we also make a movie out of it, or perhaps even a TV series? Lots of money potential there!
We could even do a survivor type swimming competition with the pirates.
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It'll be like Discovery's Deadliest Catch, except good.
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The trick is to hit them going home from a raid. Whatever we capture is ours under the laws of the sea.
Wouldn't that make the entire point of hunting pirates for the shipping companies and cruise lines moot?.....
"We couldn't get there quick enough! But we made sure they wouldn't be doing it again!"
The Viking, nice idea. How about we also make a movie out of it, or perhaps even a TV series? Lots of money potential there!
We could even do a survivor type swimming competition with the pirates.
Some kind of reality tv perhaps? Though I'll be damned if I can think of a concept beyond "shoot pirates, bring their heads in, get fat bundles of dollars in return".
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I'm in. Read the thread in the other, "secret" section.
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I'm in. Read the thread in the other, "secret" section.
SSSSHHH!
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread! OOPS! Looks like I just added to it!
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it!
sheesh. see what you did.... Oops. I did it too!
-
.
There. One too many quote boxes, it underwent collapse and became a singularity. See the point there?
-
.
There. One too many quote boxes, it underwent collapse and became a singularity. See the point there?
What point?
-
.
There. One too many quote boxes, it underwent collapse and became a singularity. See the point there?
What point?
Is there ever a point?.....
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too! Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY.
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY.
Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along, after all, we may need some bait.
Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!to pull up the anchor
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along, after all, we may need some bait.
Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!
to pull up the anchor
Obviously your fault.
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along,
after all, we may need some bait. Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!
to pull up the anchorObviously your fault.
Can we make Irwin the morale officer/bait?.....
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If he's bait, I'm sure morale will improve.
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So, Irwin is the political commissar?
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Dude, the pirates are more than likely Islamic. We use Irwin as a weapon and you'll have ShootinStudent in here whining about human rights violations so fast it will make yer head spin. ARRRG!
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I wonder how a modern longboat would look like...ah well, as long as there is a dragons head mounted on the front of it
.
All of you manly pirate-hunting men talking about buying a boat. Be hardcore! Build your own Viking-type ship...out of ice cream sticks.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/oukoe_uk_dutch_ship
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insurance is good! make it a profit center. everyone on boat is insured with others as benificiaries
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Hello, State Farm, uh, yea, I'm headed out to hunt pirates off the coast of Somalia and I'd like to get oh,,,~ $1,000,000 wioth if life insurance to be distributed amongst my crew mates. Can I get a quote on a premium for that? Hello? Helloooo??"
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its all in how you word it buisness partners often carry insurance .
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Hello, State Farm, uh, yea, I'm headed out to
hunt pirates deep sea salvage off the coast of
Somalia India and I'd like to get oh,,,~ $1,000,000 worth if life insurance to be distributed amongst my crew mates. Can I get a quote on a premium for that? Hello? Helloooo??"
fixed it for you
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Ahhhh, I seeee.... Thanks for taking care of that for me!
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I'm thinking we may just need some legal representation now and then. Maybe if El T isn't too busy we could invite him along, providing he promises not to steal all our women!
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along,
after all, we may need some bait. Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!
to pull up the anchorObviously your fault.
Can we make Irwin the morale officer/bait?.....
If bait's hard to come by, invite Geraldo Rivera.
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along,
after all, we may need some bait. Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!
to pull up the anchorObviously your fault.
Can we make Irwin the morale officer/bait?.....
If bait's hard to come by, invite Geraldo Rivera.
alright folks, the key to effective bait is something that draws your prey in. using something that will scare it off really just defeats the purpose.
-
Editing by Charles Dick
Why does this worry me?
-
I'm in.
removed for secrecy SSSSHHH!
The same goes for you! Sssssssssh!
SSHHHHHSSHHSHSHSHHSHSSHHHHHH
Rule #1: We do not talk about *beep*!
I just want to see how many quote boxes we can accumulate.
Hey! This is the APS Pirate hunting thread, not the worlds longest quote box thread!
OOPS! Looks like I just added to it! sheesh. see what you did....
Oops. I did it too!Did what?
No... I can't understand what the hell a French cruise ship is doing off the coast of Somalia. You've got the entire Mediterranean to look at, why go to East Africa?
Be happy to join in on a summer punitive expedition. As long as there's high-speed internet on board. Who's the morale officer?
Irwin, of course.
Making super-long quote boxes is GAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Quoted for truth!
On another note, has anyone else noted that certain members of the forum rarely show up for these little forays of our? We'd be glad to have them along,
after all, we may need some bait. Arrrrrrr! we'll be needin' some wenches too!
to pull up the anchorObviously your fault.
Can we make Irwin the morale officer/bait?.....
If bait's hard to come by, invite Geraldo Rivera.
alright folks, the key to effective bait is something that draws your prey in. using something that will scare it off really just defeats the purpose.
Not to worry, that bastard betrays our position for a living The bad guys will have no doubt as to our whereabouts.
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We'd WANT pirates to know where we are... We just don't want them to know about the artillery...
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I was going to mention that there's a perfectly good battleship just a few miles up the road from 280Plus that's not being used for anything special at the moment, but on reflection I guess it might be a bit difficult to disguise a battlewagon to look like a cruise ship.
Maybe if we hang garlands of flowers from the big guns? And have a mariachi band playing on the loudspeakers?
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Not a bad idea Hawk...
or maybe Calypso...
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I was going to mention that there's a perfectly good battleship just a few miles up the road from 280Plus that's not being used for anything special at the moment, but on reflection I guess it might be a bit difficult to disguise a battlewagon to look like a cruise ship.
Maybe if we hang garlands of flowers from the big guns? And have a mariachi band playing on the loudspeakers?
Just tell 'em Obama got elected and we're there to talk to and hug our enemies.
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The only sort of hugging you can do with nuclear arms.
Sorry, it's late...
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Well, I told Mrs 280 I was off to the Somalian coast to fight pirates and she said, "GO!", so I guess I'm all set.
We haven't discussed the coming back part yet...
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I was going to mention that there's a perfectly good battleship just a few miles up the road from 280Plus that's not being used for anything special at the moment, but on reflection I guess it might be a bit difficult to disguise a battlewagon to look like a cruise ship.
Maybe if we hang garlands of flowers from the big guns? And have a mariachi band playing on the loudspeakers?
that and a paint job would work fine, i think. hmmm maybe white with pink and baby blue trim?
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Bluestarlizzard, please. Those colors are soooo last season.
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Bluestarlizzard, please. Those colors are soooo last season.
fine ultramarine and carmine with ecru.
its all about knowing your crayola colors
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The only sort of hugging you can do with nuclear arms.
Sorry, it's late...
Lazy......
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What about buying an old Russian diesel sub???
That could be good for some laughs when we surfaced right behind the pirates after watching them through the periscope.
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What about buying an old Russian diesel sub???
That could be good for some laughs when we surfaced right behind the pirates after watching them through the periscope.
No, someone would screw up with the toilet and blow the waste back into the head. Ever see a sub toilet?
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It would be fistful.
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What about buying an old Russian diesel sub???
That could be good for some laughs when we surfaced right behind the pirates after watching them through the periscope.
There's a foxtrot class sub tied up here in San Diego, as part of the Maritime Museum.
http://www.sdmaritime.com/contentpage.asp?ContentID=177
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Except on a Russian sub those instructions would be in,,,Russian!
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What about buying an old Russian diesel sub???
That could be good for some laughs when we surfaced right behind the pirates after watching them through the periscope.
There's a foxtrot class sub tied up here in San Diego, as part of the Maritime Museum.
http://www.sdmaritime.com/contentpage.asp?ContentID=177 Aw hell, if we're going to do it right let's just make the Navy an offer on the Nautilus and some reactor fuel...
We'll tell them it's for underseas tours, like at Disneyworld only better...
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You know...USS Midway is here too, doing museum duty...
I know my way around her already, worked at the museum for a while. It was mostly an excuse to explore the restricted areas of the ship. I have a fascination with old boats.
How about this? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Dolphin_(AGSS-555)
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You know...USS Midway is here too, doing museum duty...
I know my way around her already, worked at the museum for a while. It was mostly an excuse to explore the restricted areas of the ship. I have a fascination with old boats.
Steal it obtain it hijack it take it out "for a ride", and we'll meet up with you at the secret location outside [deleted for secrecy] in [deleted for secrecy] days, precisely at [deleted for secrecy] hours.
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Somehow I don't think I can get a conventionally powered air craft carrier underway by myself
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Somehow I don't think I can get a conventionally powered air craft carrier underway by myself
You could try! . If you succeed, it will be awesome to hunt pirates with it, if you fail, it will be awesomely spectacular to watch you run it up on shore .
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I don't think I could get it to even move. Assuming I could get fuel on board, figure out how to start the boilers, somehow run the the engine rooms while steering, get it untied from the pier, and figure out what all the knobs and levers do, I'd probably end up steaming in a straight line, across the bay, and hitting whatever was docked over at North Island.
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I have a fascination with old boats.
If you're anywhere near Philly or Jacksonville I'm sure the Adams people would be glad to let you help, which would gain you access to the restricted areas of the ship...
Wait, I just saw the beer thread. Kali might be a tad far...
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IMHO, we want some 'Nam issue 82 foot coastguard patrol boats disguised as fishing charters
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Is the Midway permanently moored?
Down here in South Carolina, we have the Yorktown permanently moored in Charleston. Lower compartments are flooded, and she sits on the bottom.
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No, I don't think so. She's still floating.
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Would a pirate be more prone to attack a fishing vessel, or a pleasure yacht?
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When they attack merchant ships they steal personal effects and the contents of the ship's safe, which usually has payroll and such.
I can't see fishing boats being good for much unless they take the whole boat.
Yacht's will have stuff.
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Yacht's will have stuff.
hehehe. Which is when the crew served weapons come into play!
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First we need a bilge rat...
Any ideas?
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No, I don't think so. She's still floating.
Well, in that case...with enough Evinrudes bolted on the back...
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Or a very large bar of soap...
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I'd want something faster and more maneuverable than a carrier or an old diesel sub. I wanna be able to outrun the French navy, just on principal.
It turns out that the Captain of the French cruise ship vigorously defended his vessel with, get this, fire hoses. But then the pirates shot at them with real guns, and the French Captain had no choice but to surrender.
http://www.yahoo.com/s/85655
I swear, you can't make this stuff up!
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I'd want something faster and more maneuverable than a carrier or an old diesel sub. I wanna be able to outrun the French navy, just on principal.
It turns out that the Captain of the French cruise ship vigorously defended his vessel with, get this,
fire hoses. But then the pirates shot at them with real guns, and the French Captain had no choice but to surrender.
http://www.yahoo.com/s/85655I swear, you can't make this stuff up!
They atleast tried to defend themselves. Got to give them that. If it wasn't for all the stupid laws about bringing military hardware on a civilian ship, they might've had .30 caliber machineguns brought out...
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Yup, fire hoses is a standard repel boarders tactic. It does not work well against firearms. The firearms squirt lead a lot farther than the fire hoses squirt water. Imagine that.
I recall us using the 5" / 54s to repel potential boarders one time. NZ IIRC. We had already used firehoses earlier in the day as we were pulling in. Then later they was coming down the pier, we pointed the 5 inchers at them, they turned around.
I'll never forget the 1MC (loudspeaker) "PREPARE TO REPEL BOARDERS!!" We're all like, "WTF,,,HUH?!?" but this weren't no drill.
Can't open that link BTW
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Would it be more cost effective to "armor up" a yacht, or to disguse an already-armored boat?
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Would it be more cost effective to "armor up" a yacht, or to disguse an already-armored boat?
Disguising an already armored boat I'd say. Putting on extra armor would make it tons heavier, and make it slower and less manueverable unless you beef up the engines as well. Disguising an armored boat? Fiberglass and paint. Weighs nothing compared to armor.
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ahoy:
http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/mandm/ptva.htm
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Works for me... Let's get the mahogany one.