Heck, I don't care if all the Yankees and Californians come to The South or not. As a matter of fact, I'm going to change my statement and announce that I hope they do come and bring not only their money but their strange ways with them.
First of all, the humidity will take the starch right out of those New Englanders, and the lack of craziness will immobilize the Californians. As for New Yawkers and New Jerseyites (New Jersians?) the inability to get into a decent argument ought to befuddle them into inactivity.
Second, they will die of diabetes and high cholesterol just from crossing the Mason-Dixon Line.
Third, they will all think that "Well, bless his/her heart" is a compliment, not a death sentence.
The South, and the Southrons who inhabit it, are not defined so much by geography, although that has a bit to do with it. It is things like understanding the importance of establishing who your mother was before she was married and how that connects you to both your hostess and the several young ladies arrayed at the event, and how the silver tea service that was plundered during the Late Unpleasantness came to be in the possession of whoever now has it and why there has been no attempt to restore it to the descendants of the original owners. Or not getting your feathers ruffled when someone asks "How many Southerners does it take to change a lightbulb?" for the purpose of trying to insult the listeners, because you are too busy talking about in fact how good the old one was.
stay safe.
