Author Topic: Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!  (Read 7114 times)

El Tejon

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« on: December 09, 2005, 02:52:58 AM »
I am outraged.  I need a check, a very large check.

Yesterday tragedy hit the Wabash Valley--it snowed hurting women and minorities hardest.

As a minority, I'm English-American, I was hit as it snowed at my house and George Bush did not appear to shovel it off the driveway or the walks!  FEMA did not appear.  I received no food handouts and had to cook my own dinner--fresh salmon and almonds with steamed carrots.  I had no water to drink so I was forced to drink a Back Road blueberry ale.  The horror.

I loaded several magazines for my M1A to shoot at passing helicopters but no helicopters appeared.  There is only one conclusion to draw from this:  George Bush doesn't care about minority people!
I do not smoke pot, wear Wookie suits, live in my mom's basement, collect unemployment checks or eat Cheetoes, therefore I am not a Ron Paul voter.

garrettwc

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2005, 03:11:37 AM »
No one is aware of your plight yet. You have to wait for the mayor of Lafayette to go ballistic on TV.

Ben

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #2 on: December 09, 2005, 04:03:58 AM »
Have you started looting yet? No one will pay the least attention to you until you start looting. Didn't they teach you anything in victim school???
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."

Chris

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #3 on: December 09, 2005, 05:05:05 AM »
Yeah, this storm of the year dumped a whopping two - three inches in Columbus, Ohio, and can you believe my boss actually expected me to show up for work today!  I'm waiting for the area to be declared a Federal Disaster Area so I can get someone else to clean up the mess here in my office.

charby

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #4 on: December 09, 2005, 05:41:09 AM »
The rope broke on my snowblower this morning I am demanding that my yard be declared a federal disaster site and the National Guard scoop my sidewalks.

Charby
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The Rabbi

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #5 on: December 09, 2005, 05:48:48 AM »
We didnt get snow and I think the gov't needs to investigate this blatant discrimination.
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onions!

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #6 on: December 09, 2005, 05:58:24 AM »
I started yelling"HELP!HELP!HELP!" when I was shoveling my car out @ 6:30 this morning.

I could have used a helo drop of bottled water.

No one came.

Moondoggie

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #7 on: December 09, 2005, 06:24:28 AM »
Not only did I not receive any assistance from the gov't......the gov't snowplow came down my street and sealed my driveway with an impassable barrier!!!

Blocking my in my property so that others can navigate the streets....what discrimination!!!!!

How come there's no news crew to interview me in my hour of abject need?
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El Tejon

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #8 on: December 09, 2005, 06:29:15 AM »
I came back from court this morning (10:30 am) and the two Lafayette police officers were in the coffee shoppe downstairs.  They were not out shoveling snow at my house.  Thus, I AM A VICTIM.

garrett, the mayor of Lafayette, Tony Roswarski, has not yet appeared from his underground command center.  His father, who lives across the street from me, had to remove his own snow.  No doubt he used a FEMA-supplied snowblower.

Ben, have been too busy to loot.  I have some free time in April 2006 if I do not go to NYC.  I'll ensure to put looting on the calendar.

cas, no doubt immediate federal litigation is required.  Have you filed for an injunction against your supervisor yet?  Perhaps you have a claim under the ADA and ADGDEFMA (Americans demanding government do everything for me Act)?

charby, courage, brother.  Fight the power!

Rabbi, of course, our Southern brothers should not be shorted their right to a large check, er, I mean justice.

41mag, did you fire your pistol into the air as you shouted for help?

Moon, you are a victim too.  Call FEMA for your debit card without delay.
I do not smoke pot, wear Wookie suits, live in my mom's basement, collect unemployment checks or eat Cheetoes, therefore I am not a Ron Paul voter.

garrettwc

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #9 on: December 09, 2005, 06:54:26 AM »
Quote
Not only did I not receive any assistance from the gov't......the gov't snowplow came down my street and sealed my driveway with an impassable barrier!!!
You need one of these:
http://snowblower.web.aplus.net/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/mvi_4331.avi

charby

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #10 on: December 09, 2005, 07:02:11 AM »
El T

Courage?  I now have to hand shovel 5" of snow when I get home.  I need strength when I get home. I am so oppressed, my neighbor's snowblower started, I feel like a major injustice has occured, I want my 2K Visa Card so I can purchase another JD snowblower, this time with electric start, so I don't pull my arm out of socket trying to pull start a 10hp in sub freezing temperature.

Waaa Waaa give me money, maybe I need to vote democrat for now on.

Charby
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El Tejon

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #11 on: December 09, 2005, 07:04:10 AM »
*AHEM!*

garrett, you mean, of course, that FEMA should buy one for Moon, right?
I do not smoke pot, wear Wookie suits, live in my mom's basement, collect unemployment checks or eat Cheetoes, therefore I am not a Ron Paul voter.

El Tejon

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #12 on: December 09, 2005, 07:07:11 AM »
charby, not only do you need an outright "loan" of thousands upon thousands of dollars, plus food stamps and an opportunity to testify in front of Congress about how oppress you are, we need a blue-ribbon commission to study this issue.

I nominate myself as chair and you all can be on the commission.  We will fly immediately to the Virgin Islands to study and make our recommendations to FEMA.  The feds will pick up the tab, of course, as we are victims and are owed.
I do not smoke pot, wear Wookie suits, live in my mom's basement, collect unemployment checks or eat Cheetoes, therefore I am not a Ron Paul voter.

garrettwc

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #13 on: December 09, 2005, 07:55:12 AM »
Quote
*AHEM!*

garrett, you mean, of course, that FEMA should buy one for Moon, right?
Of course. Thanks for the correction.

And no private charitable organizations are allowed to help him shovel. They don't understand the severity and logistics involved in a disaster of this scale.

...has left the building.

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #14 on: December 09, 2005, 08:28:07 AM »
Bush owes me a set of Winter Carving tires by Pirelli and they haven't arrived yet. I'm calling Michael Moore!

charby

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #15 on: December 09, 2005, 08:32:21 AM »
El T

Now I need more money to remove the coffee from my keyboard and monitor.

Charby
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Moondoggie

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #16 on: December 09, 2005, 09:33:44 AM »
Moondoggie already HAS an 8 hp, 2 stage, ELECTRIC START (I spose I could use the rope starter if need be) snowblower that starts and runs just peachy.

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charby

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #17 on: December 09, 2005, 10:19:32 AM »
Well my Dad can kick your Dad's ass..  :p
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SADShooter

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #18 on: December 09, 2005, 10:27:41 AM »
Hey! No dissension in the victim ranks! We need to maintain a united front against the cruel and inconsiderate government that let it be cold while I walked my dog last night, dangit!
"Ah, is there any wine so sweet and intoxicating as the tears of a hippie?"-Tamara, View From the Porch

Chris

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #19 on: December 09, 2005, 10:33:07 AM »
Was that you walking your dog when I looked outside?  That's when I burned my sensitive little tongue on some hot cocoa with marshmallows.  So that's the government's fault, too.  Where can I file my claim for loss of taste buds?

Moondoggie

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #20 on: December 09, 2005, 10:52:13 AM »
Poor choice of metaphors, Charby....MY  Dad was light heavyweight boxing champ of the 3rd Marine Division in WWII.  His primary MOS was Machine Gunner.  No joke, he was a thouroughly dangerous individual.  I always knew during my teenage rebelion years that if I pissed him off enough he'd beat me to death in about a heartbeat-and-a-half.

And MY snowblower started when yours just sat there taking up space.  If you hook a chain to it, you'd have a dandy boat anchor!

Neener neener neener!

Betcha I get my gov't $ before you do...mine shows up on the 1st of every month!
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charby

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #21 on: December 09, 2005, 12:05:57 PM »
I work for the state so I get government money every month also.

My Dad is one of those guys that climbed 65' electrical poles with hooks. Still does every once in a while but would rather avoid it if possible. Ditto on being a teenager in my house.

I'll get the cord put back on tonight, the John Deere will blow snow again. Then I'll have bragging rights in this pissing match.

Charby
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Moondoggie

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #22 on: December 09, 2005, 12:14:48 PM »
Nothing runs like a Deere!   Smiley

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Larry Ashcraft

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #23 on: December 09, 2005, 12:15:58 PM »
Quote from: charby
Then I'll have bragging rights in this pissing match.

Charby
HA!

When I get to my home computer I'll show you what I move snow with.

And I have to buy my own diesel fuel, so I need a check too.  (Hey it snowed 2.5 inches the other night.)  It was ten below zero yesterday morning and I had to get up and put wood on the fire myself.  And I had to cut and split the wood myself too.

Lennyjoe

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Midwestern snowstorm--where was Bush?!?!
« Reply #24 on: December 09, 2005, 01:11:26 PM »
It almost hit 70 degrees today.  Its the goverments fault that it is so warm in December.  They are the ones causing global warming.