Author Topic: Colonoscope Theft  (Read 917 times)

Ben

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Colonoscope Theft
« on: April 26, 2019, 08:45:49 AM »
Eighteen colonoscopes stolen. Who knew there was a market? Solving this case will require a deep investigation.

https://www.foxnews.com/us/theft-of-18-colonoscopes-under-probe-police-say
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."

Jamisjockey

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #1 on: April 26, 2019, 08:47:54 AM »
Eighteen colonoscopes stolen. Who knew there was a market? Solving this case will require a deep investigation.

https://www.foxnews.com/us/theft-of-18-colonoscopes-under-probe-police-say

Article starts and ends with puns.  Amazing work by the journalist.
JD

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brimic

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #2 on: April 26, 2019, 10:11:03 AM »
Article starts and ends with puns.  Amazing work by the journalist.

 :rofl:
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MillCreek

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #3 on: April 26, 2019, 10:12:05 AM »
Suspects will be given GoLytely until they squeeze out a confession.
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Snohomish County, WA  USA


Quote from: Angel Eyes on August 09, 2018, 01:56:15 AM
You are one lousy risk manager.

Brad Johnson

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #4 on: April 26, 2019, 12:10:03 PM »
Has anyone seen Ned lately, and is he trying to sell anything on Craigslist?

I hope the case doesn't suffer an unexpected blockage. It needs to move smoothly along.

Brad
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WLJ

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #5 on: April 26, 2019, 12:12:50 PM »
They'll get them in the end.
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Ron

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2019, 12:43:13 PM »
Once you get into this story it’s a lot longer than you would expect and it really stinks.



For the invisible things of him since the creation of the world are clearly seen, being perceived through the things that are made, even his everlasting power and divinity, that they may be without excuse. Because knowing God, they didn’t glorify him as God, and didn’t give thanks, but became vain in their reasoning, and their senseless heart was darkened. Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools.

just Warren

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2019, 01:27:58 PM »
"But Holmes, how could you have possibly known where the colonoscope was hidden?"

"Alimentary, my Dear Watson!"

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lee n. field

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #8 on: April 26, 2019, 01:38:54 PM »
"Butt Holmes, how could you have possibly known where the colonoscope was hidden?"

"Alimentary, my Dear Watson!"



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Angel Eyes

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #9 on: April 26, 2019, 01:42:42 PM »
Article starts and ends with puns.  Amazing work by the journalist.

Some of the comments aren't bad either:

"the hunt for Hillary's emails has been taken to all new depths"

"it's a whole new "Mueller probe"...THIS time they are sure to find SOMETHING!"
"End of quote.  Repeat the line."
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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #10 on: April 26, 2019, 03:06:14 PM »
And now for a little related musical diversion . . .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oX2_4y_zg_8
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230RN

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #11 on: April 26, 2019, 04:15:29 PM »
It looks like an inside job.  Are they habit forming?  What's the street value?

WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

MillCreek

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #12 on: April 26, 2019, 04:32:27 PM »
It looks like an inside job.  Are they habit forming?  What's the street value?



I just called my biomed electronics guy and asked him:  depending on the specific model and the options, the typical scope used in the US goes for close to $ 50,000 each.  You can also get 'budget' models in the low $20 thousands. 
_____________
Regards,
MillCreek
Snohomish County, WA  USA


Quote from: Angel Eyes on August 09, 2018, 01:56:15 AM
You are one lousy risk manager.

Ben

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #13 on: April 26, 2019, 05:48:59 PM »
I just called my biomed electronics guy and asked him:  depending on the specific model and the options, the typical scope used in the US goes for close to $ 50,000 each.  You can also get 'budget' models in the low $20 thousands. 

So what are the thoughts of our medical professionals? Some kind of black market? Or maybe the latest Youtube teen challenge?  :laugh:
"I'm a foolish old man that has been drawn into a wild goose chase by a harpy in trousers and a nincompoop."

Hawkmoon

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #14 on: April 26, 2019, 06:10:48 PM »
"But Holmes, how could you have possibly known where the colonoscope was hidden?"

"Alimentary, my Dear Watson!"


This thread is officially over.
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charby

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #15 on: April 26, 2019, 06:21:13 PM »
soon to be seen on pornhub (a friend told me  ;) )
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TechMan

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #16 on: April 27, 2019, 08:34:04 AM »
The thieves did a really shitty job of covering their tracks, since there is a video of them.
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230RN

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #17 on: April 28, 2019, 03:23:10 PM »
I'm waiting for someone to come up with a good semicolonoscope joke.

Me?  I don't have a clue.
WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

HeroHog

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #18 on: April 28, 2019, 08:24:58 PM »
Make a great bore scope or for use by a mechanic!
I might not last very long or be very effective but I'll be a real pain in the ass for a minute!
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230RN

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #19 on: April 29, 2019, 08:25:11 AM »
Make a great bore scope or for use by a mechanic!

Why go through all that hassle and risk of stealing them when Harbor Freight has them for 75 bucks?

https://www.harborfreight.com/digital-inspection-camera-61839.html

<wide grin> In fact, Millcreek, you might ask your guy why the hospitals have to pay 20 large and more for theirs?<wide grin not canceled: =D >

"This multipurpose inspection camera is an economical solution to inspecting machinery, facilities and infrastructure in the safest and quickest way possible."

There, see?   Infrastructure.  That's the ticket.

Terry, 230RN
« Last Edit: April 29, 2019, 08:48:23 AM by 230RN »
WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.

WLJ

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #20 on: April 29, 2019, 11:04:22 AM »
I'm waiting for someone to come up with a good semicolonoscope joke.

Me?  I don't have a clue.

You went full colonscope
Never go full colonscope
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HeroHog

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #21 on: April 29, 2019, 12:42:55 PM »
I'll ask them when they shove that camera up my willy tomorrow...
I might not last very long or be very effective but I'll be a real pain in the ass for a minute!
MOLON LABE!

230RN

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Re: Colonoscope Theft
« Reply #22 on: April 29, 2019, 02:13:37 PM »
OOO!  Good luck, Speedy !
WHATEVER YOUR DEFINITION OF "INFRINGE " IS, YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOING IT.