7:00 pm ~ OPENING FLAG BURNING.
7:15 pm ~ PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE TO THE U. N.
7:20 pm ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
7:25 pm ~ NONRELIGIOUS PRAYER AND WORSHIP - Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton
7:45 pm ~ CEREMONIAL TREE HUGGING - Darryl Hannah
7:55 pm ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
8:00 pm ~ HOW I INVENTED THE INTERNET - Al Gore
8:15 pm ~ GAY WEDDING PLANNING - Rosie O'Donnell
8:35 pm ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
8:40 pm ~ OUR TROOPS ARE WAR CRIMINALS - John Kerry
9.00 pm ~ MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR SADDAM AND HIS SONS - Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon
10:00 pm ~ "ANSWERING MACHINE ETIQUETTE" - Alec Baldwin
11:00 pm ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
11:05 pm ~ COLLECTION FOR THE OSAMA BIN LADEN KIDNEY TRANSPLANT FUND - Barbara Streisand
11:15 pm ~ FREE THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS FROM GUANTANAMO BAY - Sean Penn
11:30 pm ~ OVAL OFFICE AFFAIRS - William Jefferson Clinton
11:45 pm ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
11:50 pm ~ HOW GEORGE BUSH BROUGHT DOWN THE WORLD TRADE TOWERS - Howard Dean
12:15 am ~ "TRUTH IN BROADCASTING AWARD" - Presented to Dan Rather by Michael Moore
12:25 am ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST
12:30 am ~ SATELLITE ADDRESS - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
12:45 am ~ NOMINATION OF HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON - Nancy Pelosi
1:00 am ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
1:05 am ~ CORONATION OF HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON.
1:30 am ~ TED KENNEDY PROPOSES A TOAST.
1:35 am ~ BILL CLINTON ASKS TED KENNEDY TO DRIVE HILLARY HOME.
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I'm going to add this now- this is a joke people.
