The snark is just not coming - please help!

[vaskidmark]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/15/elle-italia-july-2012-cover-knife_n_1601067.html?ref=topbar

I was going to try and go all snarky over the gushing about some model sporting the latest beach vacation fashion accessory, but I just can't do it.

I guess it has to do with the early hour.  Plus the fact that I'm laughing too hard to hit the right keyes consistently.

Anyhow, I offer this to you an an opportunity to flex your own snark.

stay safe.

[Viking]

"Bowie knife" if you are a pant-wetting liberal. For everyone else, it's seems just right for everyday tasks that doesn't involve stabbinating the hell out of bears, tigers or wild shoggoths.

[Regolith]

There's a knife in that photo?  

Jokes aside, That's not a knife...

[Fly320s]

There's a knife in that photo?  

There's fashion in that photo? Looks like a 6-year old girl dressed her.

[Perd Hapley]

"Bowie knife" if you are a pant-wetting liberal.

Actually, it qualifies as a Bowie because it is so "intense-looking." It gets extra Bowie points for looking intense.

[230RN]

To the urban fops and sops who consider themselves "sophisticated," every long gun is an AK-47 and every knife is a Bowie knife and all icky and ewwy and sphincter-shrinking and violence is never the answer anyway and who needs a knife or a gun in this day and age of Cuisinarts and cellphones?

[Hawkmoon]

As noted: "That's not a knife."

Seriously. It most assuredly isn't a Bowie knife. Looks to me like a letter opener in a pseudo-tactical sheath.

[RoadKingLarry]

There's fashion in that photo? Looks like a 6-year old girl dressed her.

That, and the "model" looks like a stick figure caricature of a woman.

[lee n. field]

That, and the "model" looks like a stick figure caricature of a woman.

Photoshopped, proportions adjusted. 

As noted: <crocodile dundee>"That's not a knife."
</crocodile dundee>

Fashion is about appearance and symbol, not reality.  Playing on sociobiological urges for sex and reproduction.

You'll never see an Elle model wear one of these:

[MrsSmith]

I'm very proud of you guys.

My thoughts:
- That's hardly a "big" knife as it spans only half the length of her bicep. If that spindly arm even contains muscle tissue.
- She appears to be one of those women who've had ribs removed as I've never seen a curve from rib to hip like that anywhere but on a Barbie Doll
- She most certainly was dressed by a 6-year-old. Possibly a 4-year-old.
- The expression on her face is likely indicative of her intelligence and personality. That's snarky, but I really hate the fashion world's insistence that this is an attractive look. I really think they'd sell a lot more clothes if the girls all had "girl next door" smiles rather than mannequin stares.

[280plus]

I had a Bowie knife for a while. The back of the blade was 1/4" thick. It disappeared when the cops raided my apt looking for my roommate. It never quite appeared on the evidence manifesto. Neither did my postage stamps. Rather odd booty, a Bowie knife and postage stamps.

[seeker_two]

They tried for Ursula Andress in DR. NO.....and failed miserably.... 

[Perd Hapley]

My thoughts:
- That's hardly a "big" knife as it spans only half the length of her bicep. If that spindly arm even contains muscle tissue.
- She appears to be one of those women who've had ribs removed as I've never seen a curve from rib to hip like that anywhere but on a Barbie Doll
- She most certainly was dressed by a 6-year-old. Possibly a 4-year-old.
- The expression on her face is likely indicative of her intelligence and personality. That's snarky, but I really hate the fashion world's insistence that this is an attractive look. I really think they'd sell a lot more clothes if the girls all had "girl next door" smiles rather than mannequin stares.

Don't hate her because she's Bowie-ful. After all, she appears to be smarter than this girl. 



http://www.raisinglemons.com/travel/philmont-scout-camp/

[makattak]

Don't hate her because she's Bowie-ful. After all, she appears to be smarter than this girl. 

http://i.imgur.com/ABcUt.jpg

http://www.raisinglemons.com/travel/philmont-scout-camp/

Don't blame the girl. It is apparently in her genes.

From the website captioning that photo after saying they got grief for lrtting them buy pocket knives...

(And besides, what’s a childhood without a set of stitches?)

Although I will not shelter my children for fear of getting hurt, I also won't let them actively try to get stitches.

And her father is a scout leader!? Shame.

[280plus]

Could be worse, she could be playing mumblypeg. 

[zxcvbob]

- The expression on her face is likely indicative of her intelligence and personality. That's snarky, but I really hate the fashion world's insistence that this is an attractive look.

At least she's not doing the "duckface"



In other news, on the Rolling Stone cover, Lady Gaga looks... looks like she's cold.

[BlueStarLizzard]

Mrs. Smith, I don't think your being snarky, the expressionless eyes do make her look dumber then a box of rocks.

At first glance, I didn't see the knife. I highly doubt I would have noticed it at all if I hadn't been looking for it. In addition to her miss matched outfit, she has WAY too much crap on her arms.

[MechAg94]

They tried for Ursula Andress in DR. NO.....and failed miserably.... 

That is what I first thought of.  I guess it comes from having James Bond movies imprinted on my brain at an early age.


Honestly, the fact that a knife is on her arm should not even garner notice.  it is just one more piece of crappy accessories she has on. 

[MechAg94]

At least she's not doing the "duckface"



In other news, on the Rolling Stone cover, Lady Gaga looks... looks like she's cold.

Please don't remind me.  That whole "look" is so overblown it is pathetic.  Some of the women I've seen with plastic surgery for this look hideous. 

[RoadKingLarry]

Please don't remind me.  That whole "look" is so overblown it is pathetic.  Some All of the women I've seen with plastic surgery for this look hideous. 

FTFY

[SADShooter]

Proper caption: "Things are so screwed up, even heroin-chic sophisticates are realizing you need a knife to cut through liberal media BS."

Something like that?

[Perd Hapley]

I guess that would work if she had a knife that was somewhere near big enough. A very large sword, perhaps?

[freakazoid]

+ = 

[230RN]

                  "I'm pissed."

[Hawkmoon]

That whole "look" is so overblown it is pathetic.

That was a pun ... wasn't it?