94-95, I went to U of MO, Rolla. It's an engineering school, mostly, though its mining/geology program was its original forte. Math and science, too, natch. This means that the female population was very small, at least when I went. Thank goodness for the Turkish and Chinese students, or we would have had no pretty girls at all.
On my first date with the wife, it was a good sign that we went out to eat and then to the bookstore/coffeeshop for a couple of hours, and then talked on her porch until midnight, at least. Then I was up all night thinking about her (no, not like that). I slept a couple of hours before I had to go to church the next morning, and then she sat next to me. It was also helpful that everybody supported us, from the church folks, to her students and co-workers, to the family members.
It would be a big job to describe all the factors that go into this "soul mate" thing. My wife and I just happen to be a lot alike, and pretty unlike other people. We're very weird, trust me. I guess some people are more attracted to opposites, though, so it depends on you.
What really depends on you is love. Love is not just a feeling or an impulse, it is a verb. You might start by being attracted to a girl, but the question is whether you will just take advantage of what she has to offer, or whether you will decide to love her. Love means making her more important than yourself, always seeking what's best for her, etc. Doesn't mean you bend over backwards to please her in every detail; but I think you get the point. On that basis, you can have a soul mate. Without it, you could lose a perfectly good one.