Customer Service Problem (Cemetery)

[makattak]

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_SPONGEBOB_GRAVESTONE_REMOVED?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2013-10-22-01-18-44

The article makes a big deal that the deceased was a veteran, but that's completely immaterial to this issue. (For me, at least.)

The family purchases a gaudy, 7 foot spongebob stone for her headstone and a matching one for her twin. (Twin is not dead, yet.)

Some absolute moron on the cemetery staff approves it. Now the cemetery says they don't want it there.

Now, I'm going to assume good faith and the owners/caretakers of the cemetery didn't know about this until the horrible eyesore was in the ground.

The cemetery has offered to reimburse the cost of the headstones ($26,000!!!???) and pay for new ones.

Given it is my opinion that few people will want to be buried next to/near said headstone, I completely understand the desire on the part of the cemetery to have a more respectful atmosphere.

What say APS? Could the cemetery have done anything better after some moron approved this stone?

[HankB]

Given it is my opinion that few people will want to be buried next to/near said headstone, I completely understand the desire on the part of the cemetery to have a more respectful atmosphere.

What say APS? Could the cemetery have done anything better after some moron approved this stone?

I think they've made an honest effort to straighten out the mess their moron employee created by giving approval in the first place:

The cemetery has offered to reimburse the cost of the headstones ($26,000!!!???) and pay for new ones.

BUT . . . approval WAS given. If the folks involved want to be inconsiderate boobs, I think the cemetary is stuck; continued conflict will only make lawyers rich.

[RevDisk]

What say APS? Could the cemetery have done anything better after some moron approved this stone?

Nope. They took the cash, they gave their approval. The family can be reasonable, or unreasonable. It's entirely up to them. If the cemetery doesn't play ball, it'll get very expensive in a hurry. The family has them bent over the table. Said cemetery place seems to know it, hence the very generous terms offered. Cemetery place is just delusional grade optimistic if they think they can force the issue.

[Balog]

Assuming that the family was clear in what they wanted. If they gave the impression they would be normal tombstones with carves images of the character (instead of the 7 foot monstrosities they are) then that opens some wiggle room.

[BlueStarLizzard]

They gave the approval. They're just stuck with 7 foot Sponge Bob.

I can understand being peeved right now, but in 100 years (probably less) that markers going to be a crowd pleaser. The odd stones always are.

[lee n. field]

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_SPONGEBOB_GRAVESTONE_REMOVED?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2013-10-22-01-18-44

The article makes a big deal that the deceased was a veteran, but that's completely immaterial to this issue. (For me, at least.)

The family purchases a gaudy, 7 foot spongebob stone for her headstone and a matching one for her twin. (Twin is not dead, yet.)

Some absolute moron on the cemetery staff approves it. Now the cemetery says they don't want it there.

Now, I'm going to assume good faith and the owners/caretakers of the cemetery didn't know about this until the horrible eyesore was in the ground.

The cemetery has offered to reimburse the cost of the headstones ($26,000!!!???) and pay for new ones.

Given it is my opinion that few people will want to be buried next to/near said headstone, I completely understand the desire on the part of the cemetery to have a more respectful atmosphere.

What say APS? Could the cemetery have done anything better after some moron approved this stone?

Some moron approved the stone.  Great.

I have noticed that recent grave markers seem somewhat garish.  Perhaps the cemetery should have a "bad taste" section.  (We'll be shopping soon.  I'm aiming for a simple flat marker.)

[lupinus]

Not enough detail and her being a veteran is completely irrelevant. I'd even go so far as to say they're pushing that angle a little to hard and it pings my bsometer.

Was the family honest in just what they were planning to put there? Did they seek out someone low on the totem pole to grant an the request? Was it actually approval, by someone in a position to give approval? A misunderstanding? In writing? Did they discus this with anyone before buying the plot or is there anything in the regs they agreed to when they purchased the plot?

Sounds to me like the cemetery is willing to bend over backwards, and take a big financial loss on the whole thing, to try and come to a mutually agreeable solution. Sounds perfectly reasonable that a cemetery wouldn't want such a ridiculous thing there.

[T.O.M.]

Just to throw this wrinkle in... Spring Grove Cemetery is a non-profit cemetery and garden.  It's the second largest cemetery in the U.S., and is on the National Historic Landmark list. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spring_Grove_Cemetery

Don't know what role this may play in their ability to restrict the types of headstones used...but I can understand.  You've got some significant American history in this place, with amazing gardens and some truly beautiful headstones and memorials dating back to the mid-19th century...and then a 7 foot tall Sponge Bob.  If it was just another business, I'd agree with the suck-it-up opinions, but knowing Spring Grove and its history...Sponge Bob should go.

(for purposes of full disclosure, I'm way too biased on this one.  Three generations of my family are interred in Spring Grove, including both my parents.  So, my opinion may not count.)

[BlueStarLizzard]

Not enough detail and her being a veteran is completely irrelevant. I'd even go so far as to say they're pushing that angle a little to hard and it pings my bsometer.

Was the family honest in just what they were planning to put there? Did they seek out someone low on the totem pole to grant an the request? Was it actually approval, by someone in a position to give approval? A misunderstanding? In writing? Did they discus this with anyone before buying the plot or is there anything in the regs they agreed to when they purchased the plot?

Sounds to me like the cemetery is willing to bend over backwards, and take a big financial loss on the whole thing, to try and come to a mutually agreeable solution. Sounds perfectly reasonable that a cemetery wouldn't want such a ridiculous thing there.

Yeah, but people in grief are not always reasonable. Which means be careful what you agree to when dealing with them.

If they were given permission, that's that. It's not their responcibility to make sure the cemetary has crossed it's t's and dotted it's i's.

[MechAg94]

If they are going that far in trying to resolve it, why don't they just over to build a crypt over the entire thing. 



That stone is pretty bad.  Maybe they can get some Looney Tunes fans interested.     I want the stone for "Wile E. Coyote, SuperGenius". 

[Boomhauer]

The only thing that would make this better would be for Nickelodeon to sue the family

[Balog]

If I goto some stoned Walmart cashier and ask if I can shoplift and he says "oh yeah, totes dude have a blast" that is not a binding contract. I'd love to know who approved it and what the family actually requested.

[T.O.M.]

As a National Historic Landmark, the cemetery may fall under Section 106 of the National Historic Preservation Act, which may give the management of the cemetery all the authority it needs to make a change in order to preserve the historic value of the location.

[brimic]

A 7' Spongebob?   
That'd be the kind of final ahole move that I would do.

[Stand_watie]

Some of those evergreen juniper type bushes planted around the entire plot enclosing that families purchased lots.

[Hawkmoon]

Or, if all else fails ...




















DETCORD!

[41magsnub]

Or, if all else fails ...




















DETCORD!

That would take a LOT of detcord to remedy :)

[Lee]

I wonder if the approving employee's name was Patrick.

[BlueStarLizzard]

I wonder if the approving employee's name was Patrick.

 

[lupinus]

Yeah, but people in grief are not always reasonable. Which means be careful what you agree to when dealing with them.

If they were given permission, that's that. It's not their responcibility to make sure the cemetary has crossed it's t's and dotted it's i's.

I disagree. If you read some other articles, the gravestone is not within the grave marker guidelines for the cemetery that the Walkers knew about when they purchased the plots. And irregardless, just because they found some employee to OK what is obviously and abnormal request instead of someone who was authorized to do so, doesn't mean the cemetery should be bound to it. And the cemetery in this case is willing to take a big hit to make it right by both paying for their monument to Spongebob and the replacement gravestone.

[geronimotwo]

I disagree. If you read some other articles, the gravestone is not within the grave marker guidelines for the cemetery that the Walkers knew about when they purchased the plots. And irregardless, just because they found some employee to OK what is obviously and abnormal request instead of someone who was authorized to do so, doesn't mean the cemetery should be bound to it. And the cemetery in this case is willing to take a big hit to make it right by both paying for their monument to Spongebob and the replacement gravestone.

while i don't believe that laws, rules, or guidelines are "made to be broken", there is an exception for every one.  that's why they asked permission, to go outside of the normal headstone limitations.  the issue lies with the employee giving authorization, perhaps wrongly so, perhaps not.  the employee should have known thier limitations, as the parents certainly would not have.

all that aside, who would "honor" their child with a spongebob gravestone?

[lupinus]

while i don't believe that laws, rules, or guidelines are "made to be broken", there is an exception for every one.  that's why they asked permission, to go outside of the normal headstone limitations.  the issue lies with the employee giving authorization, perhaps wrongly so, perhaps not.  the employee should have known thier limitations, as the parents certainly would not have.

all that aside, who would "honor" their child with a spongebob gravestone?

Which is why, imo, the cemetery is offering to come out of pocket for a LOT of cash. Their employee screwed up, authorized something that they shouldn't have and the cemetery won't allow, and they're trying to rectify it at their expense in a way that's mutually agreeable. If they were just saying screw you get that thing out of here, I'd be happy to cry foul.

But paying for Spongebob, along with a replacement marker that is more in line with the cemeteries guidelines strikes me as very reasonable.

[White Horseradish]

I don't really get this American desire to make cemeteries uniform and boring. Who cares if it's Spongebob, of a life-size statue of the deceased? If the family thinks this is the best way to remember her, than that's how it should be.

The cemetery, of course, is within their rights to have their rules. However, once the question was asked and answered, going back on their word is jackassery. Sorta like ATF approving your application for a firearm design, and then turning around and declaring it a machine gun after you already made it.

As far as the employee having or not having the authority, that isn't really the family's problem unless the employee they asked was the guy mowing the grass, which I kinda doubt was the case.

[lee n. field]

I don't really get this American desire to make cemeteries uniform and boring. Who cares if it's Spongebob, of a life-size statue of the deceased? If the family thinks this is the best way to remember her, than that's how it should be.

The cemetery, of course, is within their rights to have their rules. However, once the question was asked and answered, going back on their word is jackassery. Sorta like ATF approving your application for a firearm design, and then turning around and declaring it a machine gun after you already made it.

As far as the employee having or not having the authority, that isn't really the family's problem unless the employee they asked was the guy mowing the grass, which I kinda doubt was the case.

Could be Russian Mafia.  http://englishrussia.com/2007/02/27/russian-mafia-grave-tombs/

[RoadKingLarry]

It may just be a local thing. In the last couple of years I've started seeing solar lights (the inexpensive, push into the ground type seem most common) in cemeteries. Some graves are really lit up with the grave outlined with the lights, some just a light or two.
Anyone else seeing this?