The right way to do solar, is to have a PV-solar array in your home pumping into a battery bank and charge controller, with an AC inverter pushing dedicated off-grid circuits. No messy grid integration. No worries about your AC being in-phase with the grid. No worries about power distribution or demand problems.
Put the high amperage intermittent use devices onto the grid, and your low amperage long term use devices onto your solar circuits.
Something I ponder every now and again is if you were running solar and wind at home, powering a battery bank, is how much gain would you get if you were to wire up the house to run off DC power? That way you're not inverting it back to AC and switching it back for DC usage. If we could start standardizing everything to run off, oh, 24V, wouldn't that get us some efficiency gains?
Google does something like this in their data center shipping containers. The computers are all designed to run off 12V DC, no 5V/12V mix like you see on most computers. Every computer has it's own UPS that supplies 12V DC, no inversion needed. Instead of having a PSU on every machine stepping it down they just do it once for the data center and pipe that feed into the computers.
Another idea I had, when my wife was telling me about some island in the Florida Keys where grid power isn't available, they all do solar, but they have problems where you flip the microwave on and you get a house-wide brownout, is making intelligent devices that can be programmed with a priority. Your central power supply can blit out some kind of current performance level and if you flip on a microwave when there's not enough power half the lights shut off, or all go off, or just down to "emergency" levels until the high draw device is done. The fridge and freezer could be smart enough to hold off from kicking on until power was available, unless it was absolutely required, but an event like that could force all of the stupid stuff like TVs to shut off.
Unfortunately neither idea is easy achievable unless there's a major revamping of our entire appliance and lighting industry, or the person implementing it has the skills to rip out the PSU of every device they own and replace it with a custom job. So, a bit of a pipe dream.