Why white working-class single moms should stay single

[MillCreek]

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/white_working_class_women_should_stay_single_mothers_argue_the_authors_of.html

Some interesting points as to the relative lack of quality in potential male partners.

[Boomhauer]

I would actually be happy if more women stayed single instead of dating shitheads who won't work. It really pisses me off to see a beautiful, otherwise smart woman dating a piece of *expletive deleted*it who acts like a two year old because she's "desperate".

[Fitz]

I would actually be happy if more women stayed single instead of dating shitheads who won't work. It really pisses me off to see a beautiful, otherwise smart woman dating a piece of *expletive deleted* who acts like a two year old because she's "desperate".

Well, SORRY

[Perd Hapley]

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/white_working_class_women_should_stay_single_mothers_argue_the_authors_of.html

Some interesting points as to the relative lack of quality in potential male partners.

Lack of quality males is the whole problem with our culture.

I should know.  I are one.

[Balog]

Lack of punishment and incentive at the societal level for men who are useless overgrown children is the problem.

[Perd Hapley]

Lack of quality males is the whole problem with our culture.

Lack of punishment and incentive at the societal level for men who are useless overgrown children is the problem.

Yes and yes.

[Headless Thompson Gunner]

Lack of punishment and incentive at the societal level for men who are useless overgrown children is the problem.

Yup. 

[fifth_column]

Initiation into manhood is severely lacking in our culture.  When "becoming a man" is often related to dehumanizing and destructive behaviors it isn't hard to predict how that "man" is going to live his life and engage in relationships.  

I'd like to see a return to a more primal method of initiation; where the men of the community come for the boys to take them away and "kill" them.  With the mothers and women wailing and begging that their boys be spared.  Those types of rituals where the boys are metaphorically killed, and that individual then has a new identity as a man in the community, with all the responsibilities that it entails.

[KD5NRH]

Some interesting points as to the relative lack of quality in potential male partners.

Maybe http://artofmanliness.com needs to be distilled down into a HS/college class.

[AJ Dual]

So essentially the take-away here from the article is that: "ZOMG! White women in the bottom half of the economic ladder are now starting to have the same poor odds of finding/keeping a suitable male partner that black women have had starting with LBJ's 'Great Society' in 1964."

Did I get that right?

[zahc]

Lack of punishment and incentive at the societal level for men who are useless overgrown children is the problem.

More like, lack of reward for useful adult males is the problem. Many of the "useless males" are reacting rationally to a society which no longer rewards the behavior it used to.

[Boomhauer]

Initiation into manhood is severely lacking in our culture.  When "becoming a man" is often related to dehumanizing and destructive behaviors it isn't hard to predict how that "man" is going to live his life and engage in relationships. 

I'd like to see a return to a more primal method of initiation; where the men of the community come for the boys to take them away and "kill" them.  With the mothers and women wailing and begging that their boys be spared.  Those types of rituals where the boys are metaphorically killed, and that individual then has a new identity as a man in the community, with all the responsibilities that it entails.

Ookay then. or maybe we could just teach how to act right instead of acting like a child that can buy beer and vote.

[Strings]

Had a pagan men's weekend last year, where the question "What defines a man in our society?" was a common theme

And honestly, there was no good answer.

[MillCreek]

So essentially the take-away here from the article is that: "ZOMG! White women in the bottom half of the economic ladder are now starting to have the same poor odds of finding/keeping a suitable male partner that black women have had starting with LBJ's 'Great Society' in 1964."

Did I get that right?

For many years, my female professional colleagues (lawyers and physicians) have been making the same statements.  So it also applies in the upper socioeconomic groups as well.  However, it is particularly acute for minority female professionals; the chance of them finding another minority male partner of similar socioeconomic status can be very low, depending on where they live and work.

[roo_ster]

Plenty of loser men out there.  Low expectations do not help.

And plenty of decent sorts who are in a tight spot due to the economy and our country's policy of flooding the labor market.

More like, lack of reward for useful adult males is the problem. Many of the "useless males" are reacting rationally to a society which no longer rewards the behavior it used to.

Indeed.  An objective and secular evaluation of the risks/rewards and costs/benefits on the economic, social, intra-family, and legal front would suggest staying single and getting a vasectomy.  Luckily for the rest of us, not all "useful"(1) adult males so evaluate their relationships.

“I can support myself. I always have. I can support myself and our kid. I just can’t support myself, the kid, and him.”

The text of the article says otherwise, what with the help from parents and the buttload of welfare benefits the author extolls for giving women freedom.  Given that I am a taxpayer, I would rather see her in a less than perfect relationship as a married family that can support itself than as a tax-dollar hoovering duo.  

So essentially the take-away here from the article is that: "ZOMG! White women in the bottom half of the economic ladder are now starting to have the same poor odds of finding/keeping a suitable male partner that black women have had starting with LBJ's 'Great Society' in 1964."

Did I get that right?

Pretty much.  Such is "progress" in this day and age.  




(1) "Useful" as defined by the main character in the piece seems defined as "What can he do for Lilly?"  I wonder if these sorts think about how they might be deemed "useful" to squared away eligible men?  Might start with not getting pregnant with some loser's kiddo.

[Tallpine]

Had a pagan men's weekend last year, where the question "What defines a man in our society?" was a common theme

And honestly, there was no good answer.

How about:  protection, provision, and procreation  ?

[KD5NRH]

Had a pagan men's weekend last year, where the question "What defines a man in our society?" was a common theme

And honestly, there was no good answer.

Even more so when society allows people to "self identify" as whatever they want.

[Tallpine]

Seems to me that women have been complaining for decades about men being "men" - and now they are complaining because they aren't being men ... 

Funny how that works 

[BlueStarLizzard]

Yeah, so funny I'm not laughing.

there are moments when I really *expletive deleted*ing HATE our culture. >:(

[lupinus]

Seems to me that women have been complaining for decades about men being "men" - and now they are complaining because they aren't being men ... 

Funny how that works 

"Why are you holding the door for me? You think I can't do that my self?!"

"How come you never hold the door for me anymore???"

[Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas]

How about:  protection, provision, and procreation  ?

What's the payoff?

[erictank]

"Why are you holding the door for me? You think I can't do that my self?!"

"How come you never hold the door for me anymore???"

I wish I could laugh at the absurdity of it, but it's absolutely true, far too often.

More like, lack of reward for useful adult males is the problem. Many of the "useless males" are reacting rationally to a society which no longer rewards the behavior it used to.

This, in spades. Add to that the modern tendency to devalue or outright degrade traditionally-male attributes/characteristics when teaching children (something I suffered through as a child myself, raised by my divorced mother and her twin sister with no male role models from age 5), and it's not surprising that you hear women asking "Where have all the good men gone?" Ladies, they were beaten down by parents teaching them to be "good" and/or drugged into incoherence due to being little boys instead of girls, and they're *STILL* getting attacked for being non-women, from a lot of people who don't seem to understand that men are not designed to be hairy women (nor boys designed to be girls with outies rather than innies, for that matter).

It took me FAR too long to overcome my training in that respect. As a result, I'm now a lot happier than I used to be, and my wife is happier too. Imagine that.

[Tallpine]

What's the payoff?

http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/175772

[RevDisk]

Lack of quality males is the whole problem with our culture.

Oh gods yes, apparently. Or at least in the wild. I'm not exactly handsome, sophisticated or romantic. But I'm not hideous, have employment, have a home, have a car, no drug habit and "domestic violence" isn't a hobby of mine. Back when I was dating, there were numerous women essentially putting in a resume for marriage. It was actually kinda creepy. While finding a person they loved was nice, it almost seemed like there was no need for positive aspects, only a lack of negative ones.

More like, lack of reward for useful adult males is the problem. Many of the "useless males" are reacting rationally to a society which no longer rewards the behavior it used to.

This as well. US is still manufacturing a lot of stuff. We manufacture approximately $2T worth of goods, which China only surpassed in 2009 and are now at $2.5T officially. We're just doing it with a lot less people. Automation is allowing us to make more stuff, cheaply. Which is great for the consumer, and stockholder. Problem is... The displaced labor isn't going anywhere productive.

[Scout26]

I would also fail in my misogynist role if I didn't point out the dramatic increase in the number of women in work place.   It seems as if more and more firing a male (especially a white male) and replacing them with a 88% of the cost, female (especially a minority), and praises are sung to the heavens about how "diverse" and "inclusive" they are.

I saw it (and had it happen) enough times to know that I wasn't the only one.   40 years ago, you'd go to work for a Company, whether it was blue or white collar, and work there until you retired.  I can't name one male family, friend or neighbor that wasn't "downsized" at least once, and often multiple times.   Both blue and white collar.  And most often replaced by a female (usually at a lesser cost).

This culture declared war on men and then wonders why there are no men and only feral youth and loser males.