Armed Polite Society

Main Forums => The Roundtable => Topic started by: K Frame on November 28, 2022, 09:31:23 AM

Title: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: K Frame on November 28, 2022, 09:31:23 AM
Actually, Kraft should pay to have this woman beaten to within an inch of her absolutely worthless life.

To think that she's entitled to anything over such a claim is beyond comprehension.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/foodanddrink/foodnews/woman-sues-kraft-heinz-for-5m-says-mac-and-cheese-preparation-isn-t-as-advertised/ar-AA14C0ux?ocid=entnewsntp&cvid=b4b4f5309e4042998d6ba2a7b597ded9
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: French G. on November 28, 2022, 09:52:07 AM
No worse than the woman suing for millions because she would have bought $1 cheaper pasta if she hadn’t thought Barilla pasta was made in Italy. Ought to be a mechanism to disbar all the lawyers if a suit is found to be frivolous.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: WLJ on November 28, 2022, 11:33:18 AM
Good thing for Kraft she didn't spill it straight out of the microwave into her lap.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Boomhauer on November 28, 2022, 02:10:06 PM
Actually, Kraft should pay to have this woman beaten to within an inch of her absolutely worthless life.

To think that she's entitled to anything over such a claim is beyond comprehension.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/foodanddrink/foodnews/woman-sues-kraft-heinz-for-5m-says-mac-and-cheese-preparation-isn-t-as-advertised/ar-AA14C0ux?ocid=entnewsntp&cvid=b4b4f5309e4042998d6ba2a7b597ded9

Put the lawyers and frivolous suers up against the same wall.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HankB on November 28, 2022, 03:37:11 PM
Judge HankB says:

She has a valid point, the ad copy is inaccurate. My judgement is that she's entitled to actual damages - a couple of extra minutes of her time at whatever the local prevailing rate is for food preparation - at a rough guess, a buck should more than cover it. Kraft is ordered to pay up.

Plaintiff can pay her lawyer out of her $1 judgement. Her lawyer will pay all court costs.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HeroHog on November 28, 2022, 05:28:00 PM
TECHNICALLY she has a point. Had it said "Cooks in 3½ minutes", she wouldn't. Now, it wasn't MILLIONS worth of a point!
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: WLJ on November 28, 2022, 05:32:08 PM
I'm suing those x-ray glasses sellers. I was so disappointed as a kid, traumatized even. Left scars.
Think $500 million is asking too much?

(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a4/0d/0c/a40d0cd6086dd6068286659c9a075d32.jpg)
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Hawkmoon on November 28, 2022, 06:56:30 PM
Quote
The suit described Ramirez as someone who “looks to bold statements of value when quickly selecting groceries” and is “like many consumers who seek to stretch their money as far as possible when buying groceries.”

Ummm ... nope.

People who are trying to stretch their money don't pay $10.99 for a single-serving cup of Mac & Cheese -- they pay 99 cents for the store-brand mac & cheese dinner that requires cooking the macaroni, then adding the cheese and stirring it all together -- making about three generous servings or four moderate servings
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Hawkmoon on November 28, 2022, 06:57:39 PM
Judge HankB says:

She has a valid point, the ad copy is inaccurate. My judgement is that she's entitled to actual damages - a couple of extra minutes of her time at whatever the local prevailing rate is for food preparation - at a rough guess, a buck should more than cover it. Kraft is ordered to pay up.

Plaintiff can pay her lawyer out of her $1 judgement. Her lawyer will pay all court costs.

Seconded.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: 230RN on November 28, 2022, 09:51:18 PM
Gives me a notion to sue for not being able to follow the instructions to slit the crust of a frozen pot pie before microwaving it.

Because it's frozen.

Since this has happened a dozen times it orta be worth five, maybe six million bucks, no?

I'm sure I can find a lawyer willing to work for 1/3 of a nuisance settlement.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HankB on November 28, 2022, 11:27:47 PM
Gives me a notion to sue for not being able to follow the instructions to slit the crust of a frozen pot pie before microwaving it.

Because it's frozen.

Since this has happened a dozen times it orta be worth five, maybe six million bucks, no?

I'm sure I can find a lawyer willing to work for 1/3 of a nuisance settlement.
Would you like my attorney's business card? He's a partner at the law firm Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Andiron on November 28, 2022, 11:38:17 PM
Put the lawyers and frivolous suers up against the same wall.

Put the shysters in the microwave..
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HeroHog on November 29, 2022, 02:19:27 AM
Put the shysters in the microwave..

Hear about the new German microwave? It seats 6!
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: K Frame on November 29, 2022, 06:48:26 AM
Hear about the new German microwave? It seats 6!

Is that the one Alyssa Milano bought to go along with her Hitlermobile?
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Tuco on November 29, 2022, 04:52:14 PM
Yo!
Where's all my mac & cheese money at?
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: K Frame on November 29, 2022, 04:54:24 PM
I'm actually surprised that no one has filed suit against Kraft because it's orange, and orange is TTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: 230RN on November 29, 2022, 05:22:56 PM


THE REALITY OF SUING FOR ANYTHING

Would you like my attorney's business card? He's a partner at the law firm Dewey, Cheetum, and Howe.

There's nothing cheaty about it. Standard Operating Legal Procedure.  Sue for x million bucks, meet with company lawyers, they offer $50K out of court, considering the expense and risk of dealing with a court case and that judges are palsy walsy with every hungry private attorney in his jurisdiction, you counter with $100K, they up it to $75K, you shake hands on it and agree to meet for golf next Sunday.

Lawyer is richer by $25K, you're richer by $50K, company is richer by whatever it might cost to take it to court minus that piddling $75K, corporation attorneys can go to the bosses and claim they saved the company $xmillion minus $75K,get big bonuses, and judges still get their $250K per year just by banging their gavel once on the settlement.

Win win win !

All up and above-board, and SOP.  Or SOLP.

Terry, 230RN
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HeroHog on November 29, 2022, 06:12:18 PM
You forgot the 33%+ TAX to Uncle Sugar.

I got to keep slightly less than 30% of my total suit "winnings".  :old:
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: 230RN on November 29, 2022, 06:51:23 PM
You forgot the 33%+ TAX to Uncle Sugar.

I got to keep slightly less than 30% of my total suit "winnings".  :old:

Of course, but that's not unique to the legal situation and income tax is only a small part of the governments' (plural, possessive) take on your wallet. Figuring  gasoline taxes, sales taxes, use taxes on your internet and phone, the invisible Pittman-Robertson fund, that "33%+" is ....

But that's another Terrant and the moderators only allow me one Terrant per week.

Terry, 230RN
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: WLJ on November 29, 2022, 06:59:21 PM
Only one answer to this outrage, nationalize Kraft. Free Mac and Cheese for the people!
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Tuco on November 29, 2022, 09:08:57 PM
Only one answer to this outrage, nationalize Kraft. Free Mac and Cheese for the people!
Yo!
Where's all my free mac & cheese at?
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Andiron on November 29, 2022, 10:53:31 PM
Hear about the new German microwave? It seats 6!

Oye Vey! 


Quote
Is that the one Alyssa Milano bought to go along with her Hitlermobile?

Have you followed that at all?  She's one impressively stupid woman and it's hilarious.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HeroHog on November 29, 2022, 11:51:09 PM
Oye Vey!

Too soon?
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: HankB on November 30, 2022, 07:12:38 AM
You forgot the 33%+ TAX to Uncle Sugar.

I got to keep slightly less than 30% of my total suit "winnings".  :old:
I'd read that legal settlements weren't taxed . . . it would seem from your experience that I was misinformed. I'll file that info away for reference.



There's nothing cheaty about it. Standard Operating Legal Procedure. 
 . . .
All up and above-board, and SOP.  Or SOLP.

I'd rearrange it to Standard Legal Operating Procedure, or SLOP.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: K Frame on November 30, 2022, 07:38:24 AM


Have you followed that at all?  She's one impressively stupid woman and it's hilarious.


Nope, not at all. In fact, I have no idea what you're talking about. :rofl:

Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: 230RN on December 01, 2022, 08:10:36 AM
SLOP.  Very good.

HankB:

I wondered about that taxation thing, but never bothered checking it out.  I thought compensation for a loss wasn't taxable, since  it's just evening things out.  (?)  I have no idea whether punitive awards are taxable  (??)
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: WLJ on December 01, 2022, 08:21:34 AM
If it moves tax it.
If it doesn't move tax it just in case it moves.
Title: Re: Kraft MUST PAY for this outrage!
Post by: Andiron on December 01, 2022, 07:13:16 PM
Too soon?

Nah,  everything is fair game as black humor.  If the small hat tribe doesn't like it that's their problem.