What's your favorite humorous firearms saying?

[The Rabbi]

Just seen on catalogue:

"When in doubt, empty the magazine."  -Murphy.

[DrAmazon]

Gun control is using both hands.

My variation as a bullseye shooter is my favorite...

True gun control is only needing one hand!

[Gewehr98]

I found my Pooh quote on the rec.guns newsgroup around 1998.  I've been using it ever since. 

[Antibubba]

Driver only carries $20 worth of ammunition.       

[Vodka7]

Fight crime: shoot back

[drewtam]

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

[Perd Hapley]

I found my Pooh quote on the rec.guns newsgroup around 1998.  I've been using it ever since. 

I've always liked it better when accompanied with the image of Pooh holding a Martini-Henry and period helmet.  Did that come from rec.guns?  Anybody know? 

[RevDisk]

What's your favorite humorous firearms saying?

"Son, that 'one shot one kill' philosophy was never explained to you, I gather."  - My sergeant, after I worked my way through a box of .50 BMG ammo on a M2

"Accurate well placed fire has its place.  Somewhere else." - Buddy of mine, as I was loading belted 40mm ammo onto the feed tray of a Mk 19

"Uh..  Well.  It's ergonomic." - Finnish soldiers trying to think up a compliment for the M16 after firing it.  Me, I was sobbing when I had to hand back the Finnish RK 95 TP


I'm deeply surprised no one meantioned the old classic.

Peace through superior firepower!

[cosine]

I found my Pooh quote on the rec.guns newsgroup around 1998.  I've been using it ever since. 

I've always liked it better when accompanied with the image of Pooh holding a Martini-Henry and period helmet.  Did that come from rec.guns?  Anybody know? 

I've never seen the image to which fistful refers. Can anybody rectify the problem?

[Gewehr98]

Kaylee at THR did me a big favor.  She's quite the graphic artist, and took my suggestion for a Zulu War Pooh.  She borrowed Tamara's Martini-Henry as a model prop, then came up with this, and I couldn't have been more tickled:



She sent me the original Adobe PDF file, so I blew it up to 11"x17" at 1200 dpi on my Tektronix Phaser 780 color laser, and had it mounted in my office at the squadron before I retired.

Now it's hanging in my home office. 

(I'd like to remind folks this artwork is not intended for release to the public domain)

[cosine]

Nice. I hope she doesn't mind if I save it, but I won't pass or show it around.

[Matthew Carberry]

When my beloved told me about 10 yrs ago "If you'd sell your 2 horses, you could buy all of the guns you want".

My reply..."There's no such thing as "All the guns I want"".

I sold the horses about 2 yrs after she made that statement and she's been regretting it ever since.

In a similar vein, years ago when I first got into handguns and started buying them, I was asked by my then girlfriend "How many guns do you need?"

My answer?  "Just one more, honey.  Just one more."

My collection keeps growing and that statement is as true now as it was then.