Heh.
I heard a good one the other day.
A man is speeding in a 30 zone at night and is pulled over by the police. Policeman comes up to the car and says 'Sir you do realise you were doing 45mph back there?' 'No I wasn't officer, I was doing 35 at the most.' At this point the drivers wife leans across from the passenger seat and say 'Harry, you know you were doing 50mph, don't lie to the policeman.' He fixes her with a hard stare.
Policeman then says 'Sir I'm also going to write you up for the broken tail light.' Man says 'Officer, I just noticed that as I was getting into the car, I had to get home tonight I will fix it tomorrow.' Wife leans across and says 'Harry you know that has been broken for two weeks.' He hisses at her to shut up.
The the policeman says 'Sir I also spotted that you were not wearing your seatbelt.' 'I was officer, I just took it off when I parked up.' 'Harry, you never wear your seatbelt.' At that point the man screams at his wife 'Doreen shut the **** up.'
Policeman looks at her and says 'Does your husband always speak to you like that ma'am?' 'No officer,' she replies, 'only when he is drunk.'
