Some people are just... just... retarded.

[Brad Johnson]

You know, it's amazing some people can even remember to breathe.  This genius walked into an airport with a fake bomb strapped to her, claiming it was "art". 

Police: Student Arrested In Bomb Hoax Lucky Not In Morgue
Device Strapped To Woman's Chest, Officials Say

POSTED: 10:30 am EDT September 21, 2007
UPDATED: 12:15 pm EDT September 21, 2007


BOSTON -- A woman was arrested by state police at Logan International Airport on Friday after she was found with a fake bomb, state police said.

State police said Star Simpson, 19, approached an airport information desk with a computer circuit board, wiring and Play-Doh in her hands and asked about an arriving passenger, said State Police Maj. Scott Pare, the commanding officer at the airport.

"She claims that it was just art and she was proud of the art and wanted to display it. I am not sure why she had the Play-Doh in her hands. She could not explain that," Pare said.
 

Pare said the device had wires connected to a battery, allowing it to light up.

Massachusetts Port Authority officials notified state police about 8 a.m. and troopers found Simpson outside Terminal C. Police determined that the device was a fake after her arrest.

"I'm shocked and appalled that somebody would wear this type of device to an airport in this time. We're currently under Orange, the threat is there against aviation and we did have MP5 officers respond to the scene immediately," Pare said.

Pare said state police were ready to use lethal force if Simpson resisted arrest.

"She followed instructions as was required by the State Police and within minutes EOD unit found that it was an innocuous device and we took her into custody. Thankfully, because she followed instructions as was required, she ended up in a cell as opposed to the morgue. Had she not followed instructions, deadly force may have been used," Pare said.

Simpson was looking for information on an inbound passenger from Oakland. The name of the passenger was confirmed, but police said they were not sure about the pair's relationship.

Pare said Simpson took a subway to the airport, but he didn't know if she was wearing the device at that time.

Police said Simpson answered questions rationally and was upset to be in custody, but did not appear to understand the seriousness of what she had done.

Simpson will be arraigned on charges of disturbing the peace and possession of a hoax device in East Boston District Court on Friday.

Simpson is a Massachusetts Institute of Technology sophomore from Hawaii, officials said. According to MIT's Web site, Simpson is a member of the school's swimming and diving team.

On her Web site, Simpson described herself as someone who loves "crazy ideas" and has been "traveling the world and saving the planet from evil villains with my delivered-just-in-time gadgets."

She went on to say she is an inventor, artist, engineer and student who loves to build things.

Copyright 2007 by TheBostonChannel.com. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

[Len Budney]

This part jumps out:

"I'm shocked and appalled that somebody would wear this type of device to an airport in this time. We're currently under Orange, the threat is there against aviation and we did have MP5 officers respond to the scene immediately," Pare said.

The statement is asinine on so many levels. Is he trying to say that it's fine and dandy to wander around the airport with a fake bomb if the threat level were green? That's idiotic. And what's with "currently"? The threat level has been "or'nge" continuously for years now. Not yellow, not red, not magenta; it's always orange. He might as well have said, "Why today of all days? Doesn't she realize it's a calendar day?"

--Len.

[Brad Johnson]

Not yellow, not red, not magenta; it's always orange.

I would much prefer a nice shade of mauve.

Brad

[Len Budney]

Not yellow, not red, not magenta; it's always orange.

I would much prefer a nice shade of mauve.

I'd love to hear the Sam Kinison (RIP) do the recording. "Today the department of Homeland Security has raised the threat level to HOT PINK! HOT EFFING PINK! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE! AAAUUAUAUAUAHGH! Please attend to your baggage. Thank you."

--Len.

[roo_ster]

I miss Sam.

[The Rabbi]

Ah, truly amazing. What the hell did she think was going to happen?  Her guts sprayed all over the walls and falls from multiple strikes from an MP5?  That might be art.

[Manedwolf]

This is what patrols Logan.



That waste of air is very lucky to be alive. And I'd honestly be more worried about innocent bystanders being hit, since these are regular MA state troopers who do that patrol.

There's no reason to have "play doh" with an electronic device unless you're trying to make it look like plastic explosive..or, more like the movie version of plastic explosive. Enough to make people think it's indeed a bomb.

Hopefully this moron gets hard prison time. Not just for what she did, but because innocent people could have been killed by missed MP5 fire if she made the wrong move. Hopefully that'll be part of the prosecution.

[Fly320s]

Maned, pic no worky.

As for the "student-artist"... what an ultra-maroon.

The State Trooper's office is about 100 yards from terminal C.  There are always Troopers with guns, dogs, SMGs, and bad looks walking around there.

Frankly, I'm surprised the trooper didn't say, "<Bang.bang.bang>  Police.  Don't move!!"

[Manedwolf]

Fixed.

I've only had to go there to pick some people up. I know what a full-auto MP5 sounds like and have fired one. Knowing of the typical range time spent by many LEOs, if I heard one there, I'd be on the ground and hopefully behind hard cover before anyone could say "what's that?" I somehow doubt the target would be the only thing hit.

Simpson was immediately surrounded by police holding machine guns.

I hope that's not literal, and they meant "covered by", not "surrounded by"...

[Jamisjockey]

Fixed.

I've only had to go there to pick some people up. I know what a full-auto MP5 sounds like and have fired one. Knowing of the typical range time spent by many LEOs, if I heard one there, I'd be on the ground and hopefully behind hard cover before anyone could say "what's that?" I somehow doubt the target would be the only thing hit.

Simpson was immediately surrounded by police holding machine guns.

I hope that's not literal, and they meant "covered by", not "surrounded by"...

My experience has actually been that Airport police tend to get more range time.  Thier position keeps them close, and alot of airports have ranges nearby.
Alot of airports get local or state cops that are assigned to the airport for a duration, or its a sub department of a larger force (SLC airport police are a department of the SLC pigs police  ).
I'd actually be more confident that they are using the MP5's instead of thier sidarms.  The best thing about pistol carbines is accuracy at shorter distances.

[Manedwolf]

As long as they only move "da switch" to the first or second options...

[GigaBuist]

Well, there's a picture of the "bomb." 

[K Frame]

Wow. That certainly doesn't look like a bomb.

Then again, Richard Reid's shoe didn't look like a bomb, either...

[The Rabbi]

It doesnt look much like art either.

[Manedwolf]

Well, there's a picture of the "bomb." 

And what does a real one look like, then? How are people supposed to know there's not cylinders of explosive in pouches inside the sweatshirt, and that's initiator circuitry of some kind, a crude 9v to high-voltage flash circuit trigger done on a breadboard?

She also had play-doh, which could be mistaken for Semtex or some other plastic explosive from a distance. It was damned stupid. Period.

[Phyphor]

Exactly.

She's damned lucky those cops didn't execute the Suicide Bomber drill as practiced in the UK...or by El Al airlines....

[Fly320s]

My bet is that she knew exactly what she was doing and that her "art" could/would be construed as an explosive device.  She did it for kicks and giggles.

[Perd Hapley]

Well, there's a picture of the "bomb." 

And what does a real one look like, then? How are people supposed to know there's not cylinders of explosive in pouches inside the sweatshirt, and that's initiator circuitry of some kind, a crude 9v to high-voltage flash circuit trigger done on a breadboard?

It was damned stupid. Period.

I remember saying that about the Aquateen Hunger Force bombings some time ago.   Who was that guy I was arguing with?  Maned something?   

[member1313]

I'm more curious about why the Staties carry suppressed MP5's more than why that lady is crazy.

[BakerMikeRomeo]

At London when I went to see my folks there, the airport po-po had G36Cs. I figure they have them because they're more accurate and powerful than pistols, and since they don't exactly have to sit in a squad car all day, the added bulk and conspicuousness isn't as big a deal as it would be for Officer Average, Beat Cop.

~BakerMike

[Manedwolf]

As to her judgement in general, this photo is this "athletic 19-year-old"'s boyfriend.

ASSOCIATED PRESS
Star Simpson, 19, left court after her arraignment yesterday in Boston. Riding with her was boyfriend Tim Anderson.

[Sylvilagus Aquaticus]

Looks like a match made in MySpace to me.

Obviously, they'd Photoshopped their respective profile pictures.

and yeah, walking around anywhere these days with something that looks like an LED op panel with Play-Doh is absolutely stupid, let alone in even the unsecure area of an airport terminal.

Regards,
Rabbit.

[MechAg94]

I was thinking more about CHL holders in some states.  I bet someone if someone like that walked into the wrong place and stood up on a table, she would get shot.  Not in Boston I guess.

[Hawkmoon]

My bet is that she knew exactly what she was doing and that her "art" could/would be construed as an explosive device.  She did it for kicks and giggles.

Exactly.

From the article:

She went on to say she is an inventor, artist, engineer and student who loves to build things.

She left out a few other appropriate, self-descriptive adjectives, it would seem: idiot, moron, twit, air-head ...

[Manedwolf]

I was thinking more about CHL holders in some states.  I bet someone if someone like that walked into the wrong place and stood up on a table, she would get shot.  Not in Boston I guess.

There's generally two sorts who are carrying weapons in Boston. Gangsta thug/criminals/muggers, and  ...that's it.