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Author Topic: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute  (Read 18221 times)

Bigjake

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #75 on: August 06, 2008, 11:13:13 AM »
I've got it.  Anybody remember Equilibrium?  They were really on to something there....
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Iain

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #76 on: August 06, 2008, 11:16:24 AM »
I'm no fan of the death penalty, or of death penalty punishment fantasies.

Bet they can find a vein though - most people have a big fat vein running near the ankle bone. More than a few times I've come close to suggesting to a phlebotomist that there's no way they can be incompetent enough to miss that one.
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alex_trebek

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #77 on: August 06, 2008, 11:25:53 AM »
Quote
I've got it.  Anybody remember Equilibrium?  They were really on to something there....

This can't possibly work, politicians would never go for it.  How the hell are they gonna stay in office if people don't feel emotions, and actually have to judge them based on performance???   laugh
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seeker_two

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #78 on: August 06, 2008, 11:59:42 AM »
Quote from: .Cheese. on August 06, 2008, 09:50:30 AM

No doubt about whether or not he deserves to die IMO.  The only question is whether the issues his attorney is bringing to light would warrant a different method of execution.

Easy solution....whatever method is suggested, we test it on his attorney first.....
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MechAg94

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #79 on: August 06, 2008, 01:01:23 PM »
If he was assigned by the state, that is not really fair. 

I am sure El Tejon can help us with methods to kill attorneys.  Cheesy
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The Annoyed Man

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #80 on: August 06, 2008, 01:30:47 PM »
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I am sure El Tejon can help us with methods to kill attorneys.  laugh

Hey! That's what I'm trying to become!  laugh
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Scout26

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #81 on: August 06, 2008, 01:35:02 PM »
Quote from: .Cheese. on August 06, 2008, 12:30:47 PM
Hey! That's what I'm trying to become!  laugh

A test speciman ??  I hear the retirement plan needs work..........
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Regolith

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #82 on: August 06, 2008, 01:38:31 PM »
Quote from: MechAg94 on August 06, 2008, 12:01:23 PM
If he was assigned by the state, that is not really fair. 

I am sure El Tejon can help us with methods to kill attorneys.  Cheesy

Well, sharks with freaking lazerbeams attached to their heads won't work.  Something to do with professional courtesy or some such....

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Bigjake

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #83 on: August 06, 2008, 01:39:35 PM »
Quote from: Regolith on August 06, 2008, 12:38:31 PM
Quote from: MechAg94 on August 06, 2008, 12:01:23 PM
If he was assigned by the state, that is not really fair. 

I am sure El Tejon can help us with methods to kill attorneys.  Cheesy

Well, sharks with freaking lazerbeams attached to their heads won't work.  Something to do with professional courtesy or some such....



LOL snark
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seeker_two

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #84 on: August 06, 2008, 03:07:21 PM »
Quote from: scout26 on August 06, 2008, 12:35:02 PM
Quote from: .Cheese. on August 06, 2008, 12:30:47 PM
Hey! That's what I'm trying to become!  laugh

A test speciman ??  I hear the retirement plan needs work..........

...but the medical plan is great......
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lee n. field

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #85 on: August 06, 2008, 06:08:05 PM »
A gallows would probably work better with an overweight user.
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Antibubba

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #86 on: August 06, 2008, 08:34:25 PM »
Just take him off the Topamax for a month.  When the migraines return he'll BEG for death.  Then give him an entire month's worth of it, all at once. 

It ends up costing exactly the same amount of money.  Less, when you consider he'll eat less during a headache.
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RaspberrySurprise

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #87 on: August 06, 2008, 10:38:35 PM »
HALO Jump sans parachute ought to do the job nicely.
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seeker_two

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #88 on: August 07, 2008, 12:54:27 AM »
Quote from: RaspberrySurprise on August 06, 2008, 09:38:35 PM
HALO Jump sans parachute ought to do the job nicely.

....not if he lands on my car or house....
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wmenorr67

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #89 on: August 07, 2008, 01:09:20 AM »
Quote from: seeker_two on August 06, 2008, 11:54:27 PM
Quote from: RaspberrySurprise on August 06, 2008, 09:38:35 PM
HALO Jump sans parachute ought to do the job nicely.

....not if he lands on my car or house....

It could be done over open water.
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Firethorn

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #90 on: August 07, 2008, 02:03:58 AM »
Quote from: wmenorr67 on August 07, 2008, 12:09:20 AM
It could be done over open water.

Or a designated bombing range.
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wmenorr67

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Re: Death row inmate: I'm too fat to execute
« Reply #91 on: August 07, 2008, 02:06:25 AM »
Quote from: Firethorn on August 07, 2008, 01:03:58 AM
Quote from: wmenorr67 on August 07, 2008, 12:09:20 AM
It could be done over open water.

Or a designated bombing range.

Drop him over Tehran.
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There are five things, above all else, that make life worth living: a good relationship with God, a good woman, good health, good friends, and a good cigar.

Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, Jesus Christ and the American Soldier.  One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

Bacon is the candy bar of meats!

Only the dead have seen the end of war!
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