Armed Polite Society
Main Forums => The Roundtable => Topic started by: castle key on August 13, 2009, 06:54:08 PM
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I am the public affairs person for my Government agency. I deal with the media every day and have made some observations about them. Generally they are pretty fair. They are a competitive bunch. Some are rude, but not all. There is a small minority of arrogant bastards, but most not so much. Some I really like, most I am indifferent about, and one I genuinely despise.
Some are pretty intelligent, most are middle of the road for brains.
I just got off the phone with one who is exceeding stupid.
He called to ask some follow up questions for a simple local story. I did not know the answers because I am going on leave and had someone else cover the q and a. He asked why some one else was filling in for me. I said I was getting ready for two weeks of vacation. Politely, he asked me where I was going. I replied that I was going to the beach.
Reporter "Oh, that's great. The beach is great."
Me "Yeah, the beach is great, I gotta get going and get my stuff packed."
Reporter "Oh, ok, the beach is great. You know, the beach is about the sand."
Me "Yeah, about the sand."
Reporter "Yeah, it's about the sand."
Me "I agree, it's about the sand. Hey, I gotta get moving, you know, get my stuff packed and all."
Reporter "Sure, while you're at the beach, remember, the beach is about the sand."
By golly, is the most intelligent thing a reporter for a major television outlet in the second largest market in the country can say about a vacation or the beach? Is it no wonder that these slimes are fawning all over Dear Leader as if he is the Second Coming? And most alarming, the drooling masses in this country look to the likes of this hack for guidance in how to live their lives.
I end my rant thoroughly disgusted.
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Beaches are made of sand. You find sand at the beach.
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I like sand.
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Sand is wet sometimes, at the beach.
Brad
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Like Sand Through An Hourglass.
So are the days of our lives
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I like George Sand...
Sand Tarts
Sands Guitars
The House of Sand and Fog
White Sands
Sand Castles
Sand Dollars
Navajo Sand Paintings
Great Sand Dunes National Park
Lines in the Sand
The Sand Pebbles
The Sand Man
I don't like Sand Fleas...
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I used to have sand-colored hair.
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Be sure to remember sand when you're at the beach. It really is about the sand.
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If you die and are buried at the beach, do you take a sand nap?
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Be sure not to get sand in your sandwich.
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Or your vagina.
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I hate it when that happens.
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Sand in the folds.
Not a fun way to go.
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I like sand.
[Ep2 Anakin] I hate sand. It's coarse, and rough, and irritating... and it gets EVERYWHERE. [/Ep2 Anakin]
=D Sorry. Star Wars geek. Couldn't help it.
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Mmmmmmmmm
Sandwiches
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Beaches are made of sand. You find sand at the beach.
Some beaches have rocks, no sand.
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But since sand is just a bunch of little rocks, rocks are just big sand.
Or young sand.
I still want a sandwich.
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That has to beat some of the comments I have received.... and I've gotten some extremely stupid ones from people.
I swear that some people really do have a negative IQ.
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Well, some beach.
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I wonder if the reporter is married to a celebrity I heard say she loved the beach because it was so close to the water.
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Are you sure you weren't supposed pick up a roll of top secret microfilm or something from him?
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And there's that lovely lady named Sandi...
jb
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Well, some beach.
... somewhere...
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Is it no wonder that these slimes are fawning all over Dear Leader as if he is the Second Coming?
Its all about sand telepromtor.
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I wonder if the reporter is married to a celebrity I heard say she loved the beach because it was so close to the water.
Yeah, because otherwise, it would be a desert. :)
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I swear that some people really do have a negative IQ.
The IQ of ... sand?
Brad
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Bring him back a small amount, and you'll own his soul......
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(https://armedpolitesociety.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dogsinthenews.com%2Fissues%2F0212%2Fpictures%2Fannie_sandy_ditn230.jpg&hash=de1066b589c5f07d6a1a730096872b398fca00cb)
OOPS! My mistake!!
You said "Sand" and "Beach"...
DD
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According to the doctor, I've just got three severe sprains, no major damage - so, rather than feeding the socialist monster, I took the kids to the beach.
Sandy place, the beach;
and the truck
the bathtub
and my shoes
backpack
shorts
knee brace
hair
at least two beds...
Maybe he was right,
about the sand.
Sand Haiku:
Sandy place, the beach
It is all about the sand?
Now it is, dammit.
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But isn't the sand about the beach?
BTW, sand is the worst thing about the beach, except for maybe jellyfish and the inescapable sun that will cook you like a snail lost on a Houston parking lot at high noon.
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But isn't the sand about the beach?
BTW, sand is the worst thing about the beach, except for maybe jellyfish and the inescapable sun that will cook you like a snail lost on a Houston parking lot at high noon.
Or Jaws. Jaws is a bad thing about the beach.
Although he's not technically at the beach, he's more JUST off the beach.
Of course, that would sort of make him "about the beach".
Also, box jellyfish (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Box_jellyfish).
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You know the saying "Salt of the earth." I know some people I consider "Sand of the beach."
Brad
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Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:
Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's. Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
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This has nothing to do with SAND! It's about the sand, man!
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Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
but that's why I went to the beach today, because I had a Dr Appointment because I blew both knees and an ankle in a BMX bike incident and decided to cut work for the rest of the day!!!
There'd be no sand (except at the beach) had I been kind to my knees.
I do miss them, my knees.
I don't give a rat for the sand.
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Well, some beach.
Well....sand is really a sum of a beach........
(phoenetic joke....think about it.... =D )
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Are you sure you weren't supposed pick up a roll of top secret microfilm or something from him?
The blue fish is swiming. I repeat: The blue fish is swiming.
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The blue fish is swiming. I repeat: The blue fish is swiming.
DORYFISH! IT'S A DORY! DORY!!!!
Sorry, three year old moment there. =D