Post by: Nathaniel Firethorn on June 14, 2006, 05:35:12 AM
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Soup-Fearing, Semi-Celibate Dude Wants You to Run His Life
FoxNews, Tuesday, June 13, 2006
So what do you do if youre a 35-year-old kazoo-playing dude from New Jersey whos afraid of soup and redheads, just moved out of your moms place and you havent had sex in two years?
Assuming, of course, that youre fool enough to admit those things to anyone but your imaginary friend, you could opt to share every sordid detail of your neurotic existence on a 24-hour Web show.
Kieran Vogel thought it was a good idea, anyway.
Starting Wednesday, Vogel will lock himself in a house in Monmouth County fitted with 32 cameras where experts will attempt to make him over and Web viewers will make all of his decisions for him, the New York Post reports.
OurPrisoner.com, billed as the first 24-hour interactive reality show, allows interested parties to choose what Vogel wears, whom he dates and what he does all day long as long as it occurs within the confines of his virtual prison.
It might sound dull, if it werent for the fact that Vogel happens to be & um & a bit eccentric. The freelance graphic designer who says soup is a morass of sickening food residue also fears public restrooms.
So much, in fact, that hes revolted if someone whos just used one walks his way.
Another ingredient in Vogels crazy pie is an absolute aversion to sweat especially a womans sweat. He hates it so much, in fact, that he plays freeze-out with the AC when hes being active with a lady no matter how infrequently that may be.
But at least hes trying. Vogel says he wants to be freed from his eccentric existence and find true love, and hes hoping that his stint as an Internet Prisoner might just do the trick.
During his confinement, hell have regular sessions with a therapist, a personal trainer, a cooking teacher and a dance instructor, among other coaches. Hell be set up on blind dates every week all of which have to take place in the house and viewers will get to vote on whom he goes out with again and who gets the boot.
If he can stand the pressure for the entirety of his six-month stay, hell get a new car and a $60,000-a-year job at BigString.com.
- NF
FoxNews, Tuesday, June 13, 2006
So what do you do if youre a 35-year-old kazoo-playing dude from New Jersey whos afraid of soup and redheads, just moved out of your moms place and you havent had sex in two years?
Assuming, of course, that youre fool enough to admit those things to anyone but your imaginary friend, you could opt to share every sordid detail of your neurotic existence on a 24-hour Web show.
Kieran Vogel thought it was a good idea, anyway.
Starting Wednesday, Vogel will lock himself in a house in Monmouth County fitted with 32 cameras where experts will attempt to make him over and Web viewers will make all of his decisions for him, the New York Post reports.
OurPrisoner.com, billed as the first 24-hour interactive reality show, allows interested parties to choose what Vogel wears, whom he dates and what he does all day long as long as it occurs within the confines of his virtual prison.
It might sound dull, if it werent for the fact that Vogel happens to be & um & a bit eccentric. The freelance graphic designer who says soup is a morass of sickening food residue also fears public restrooms.
So much, in fact, that hes revolted if someone whos just used one walks his way.
Another ingredient in Vogels crazy pie is an absolute aversion to sweat especially a womans sweat. He hates it so much, in fact, that he plays freeze-out with the AC when hes being active with a lady no matter how infrequently that may be.
But at least hes trying. Vogel says he wants to be freed from his eccentric existence and find true love, and hes hoping that his stint as an Internet Prisoner might just do the trick.
During his confinement, hell have regular sessions with a therapist, a personal trainer, a cooking teacher and a dance instructor, among other coaches. Hell be set up on blind dates every week all of which have to take place in the house and viewers will get to vote on whom he goes out with again and who gets the boot.
If he can stand the pressure for the entirety of his six-month stay, hell get a new car and a $60,000-a-year job at BigString.com.
Post by: K Frame on June 14, 2006, 06:25:24 AM
Post by: garrettwc on June 14, 2006, 07:07:27 AM
Post by: Antibubba on June 15, 2006, 03:46:54 AM
Post by: Gewehr98 on June 15, 2006, 01:06:15 PM
Post by: jefnvk on June 15, 2006, 04:32:50 PM
He is a dumbass.
Post by: Sindawe on June 15, 2006, 06:19:17 PM
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... find true love...
Watch, his true love will be a redheaded scorpio woman. LOL
Post by: garrettwc on June 15, 2006, 06:56:14 PM
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Watch, his true love will be a redheaded scorpio woman. LOL
Who's a sweaty female body builder who volunteers part time in a soup kitchen. 
Post by: cordex on June 16, 2006, 04:12:12 AM
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Who's a sweaty female body builder who volunteers part time in a soup kitchen.
Specifically, she cleans the public toilets at the soup kitchen.
Post by: Fly320s on June 16, 2006, 05:19:05 AM
Post by: garrettwc on June 16, 2006, 07:18:59 AM
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Specifically, she cleans the public toilets at the soup kitchen.
Nice followup 