Al-Jazeera Interviewee: American Military Utilizes Witchcraft

[MicroBalrog]

Gitmo Detainee Exposes the Secrets of Jewish Warlocks

Walid Muhammad Hajj: That's right. I remembered an incident with a guy who sat next to me in the morning. When they brought the milk, he began to urinate into the milk.

Interviewer: In front of you?

Walid Muhammad Hajj: Yes. I said to him: "Why are you urinating in the milk?" That's when we knew that he was under a spell. After he had recovered a little, after we read Koranic verses to him, he said to me: "The birds on the barbed wire would talk to me, and tell me to urinate in the milk. When the guards pass by my cell, the sound made by their pants talks to me."

This is the most awesome propaganda of Western military power, EVER.

Our enemies now seriously believe that America has literal magical powers at its disposal.

We need to pay Al-Jazeera.

[just Warren]

Would sorcery be handled by (dark) chaplains or warrant officers?

[Scout26]

You are getting very sleepy....

Now squeak like a chicken, flap your arms, run around in circles, and peck at the ground.

Youtube will melt down from the LULZ.......


If the Pentagon doesn't exploit this.....

[Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas]

I officially deny giving LSD to Gitmo inmates.

[Strings]

Where was Rev at the time in question?

[CNYCacher]

Where was Rev at the time in question?

In a helicopter, waiting for someone to flap their arms and run in circles. . .

[RevDisk]

Where was Rev at the time in question?

Trying to figure out the poorly translated instruction set on one of the gifts I bought for someone.  Step 13.b, I'm pretty sure it's "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn".  Not sure how that helps, but eh, gave it a shot anyways. 

[AJ Dual]

I still think we should encourage the rumor that detainees get sex-change operations at Gitmo or wherever and are re-released into the ME as women.

Then all we need to do is put them on a gurney, and show them a computer screen where we show them some plastic surgery mock-ups, and ask them stuff like "what breast size would you like?" and wheel them past a hallway full of fake male genitalia in formaldehyde bottles.

I think they'd sing like canaries. 

[Racehorse]

AJ's on to something. Who needs waterboarding?

[Jocassee]

I still think we should encourage the rumor that detainees get sex-change operations at Gitmo or wherever and are re-released into the ME as women.

Then all we need to do is put them on a gurney, and show them a computer screen where we show them some plastic surgery mock-ups, and ask them stuff like "what breast size would you like?" and wheel them past a hallway full of fake male genitalia in formaldehyde bottles.

I think they'd sing like canaries. 

And this is why, as soon as I become ruler of a small oil-rich country you will get a phone call about an open position as Chief of Intelligence.