Oh, no! I'm in trouble now

[Monkeyleg]

Just received this. I have fines! From Florida, even though I've never set foot in the state.

****************************
Good evening!

You has the fines for property tax.
Sum: $226.74

===Detailed announcement is in the attachment===

You gotta check document before: April 9th 2014.
Else you'll obtain lawsuit.

Best wishes,
Superior of Florida Department of Revenue.
Tasha Jeffers
+1 (301) 627-16-52

Please do not reply to this message. Replies to this message are routed to an unmonitored mailbox. If you have questions please go to our site. You may also call us.

No malware found in this notice. Checked by ESET NOD32. Tue, 22 Apr 2014 13:28:37 +0000

[fifth_column]

It looks like it was written by Ali G . . .

[mtnbkr]

uh oh, you has the fines.

Is that like having the clap?

Chris

[Brad Johnson]

You do-ah da crime, you do-ah da time. You has be warned and obtain knowledges.

Brad

[AJ Dual]

I keep replying with offers to write coherent letters in American English for a cut of whatever they get, but they never answer me. 

[cambeul41]

They might actually collect from enough people to make the scam worth their time and effort. After all, to speakers of that variety of English,  this might look legit.

[makattak]

Merciful heavens! The economy is even worse than I thought.


The lol-cats have become scammers.

[makattak]

Also:

http://www.salespider.com/bn-303603626/301-627-1652

(301) 627-1652

Phone Number Belongs To SMTX, INC

PO BOX 418 Upper marlboro, Maryland 20773

[Jim147]

uh oh, you has the fines.

Is that like having the clap?

Chris

I'm guessing closer to crabs.

jim

[HankB]

You has the fines.

If you not be payin' dem, dey is gonna take all yo Florida prop'ty.

[never_retreat]

So apparently I won a Touyta.
From a guy named cheetham.

Ya if your going to tell me I won a car spell it right.

TOUYOTA AUTOMOBILES COMPANY
Soi 6 Sathorn Bangkok 10120
Bangkok Thailand.
Luton, Bedfordshire LU1 3YT
Register company number: 4533384
www.toyota.co.th
Telephone: 66947731527
 
Dear E-mail Owner
 
This is to inform you that you have won a BRAND NEW Touyota Lottery 2014 CAR and a cash prize of ( US$2,500,000 00 USD). The car comes with a special TOYOTA INSURANCE Cover for one whole year that is till the next promotion. It also comes with a one year warranty and FREE repairs at any TOYOTA AUTOMOBILES depot or service centre worldwide. Your Batch No: 515944052/166 and Winning No: 1544 make you as one of the lucky winner in our 2014 NEW YEAR Charity bonanza.
 
Your email address has therefore been approved to claim a total sum of (US$ 2,500,000.00 UNITED STATES DOLLARS) in cash with the following reference numbers:
 
Ticket Number 9990542188(TMPWAYZ20736).
Serial Number KL4710827
Reference Number: ZXS433/453L/GHTY.
Bonus Number VXT55
INSURANCE Number is: WIF0050770
 
Note: your e-mail address qualified for the draw, as a result of your visiting various websites we are running the e-business promotions for. You/Your Company email address, attached to ticket number 9990542188(TMPWAYZ20736), with serial number KL4710827 drew the Reference Number: ZXS433/453L/GHTY. And Bonus number 1 and consequently YOU HAVE won in the Second Category. To begin your claim:-
 
FILL UP THE BELOW FORM:
 
1. Full Name:
2. Full Address:
3. Occupation:
4. Age:
5. Sex:
6. Country:
7. Winning Email:
8. Mobile Number:
 
For further clarification please call and send mail to your claim agent (Mrs. Ho Cheetham) in order to process your claims with our payee bank:- Sir. Yousef Vugar. OR Dr.David Idan
Contact Person: Mrs. Ho Cheetham  
Contact Email: coordinatorwna@gmail.com
Phone Number: +66947731527
Congratulation On Your Winnings.
 
WARNING: Keep your winning information confidential until your claims are processed and your fund remitted to you in your bank account. This is part of our precautionary measure to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this program by some unscrupulous elements.
 
Congratulations once again,
 
Yours faithfully,
Mr. Look More Frankly
(V.P FINANCE)
TOUYOTA MOTORS CORPORATION LTD.
www.toyota.co.th

[Perd Hapley]

I keep replying with offers to write coherent letters in American English for a cut of whatever they get, but they never answer me. 

Probably can't read.

[Monkeyleg]

I keep replying with offers to write coherent letters in American English for a cut of whatever they get, but they never answer me. 

Well, you could start by spelling cohairant properly.

[230RN]

I keep replying with offers to write coherent letters in American English for a cut of whatever they get, but they never answer me. 

I offered that a couple of times a long time ago.  No response here, either.   Maybe I should have had a 6-yr old write the offer.

[brimic]

You has the fines for property tax.

I would respond with the only ghettobonics that I know (even though I have no idea what the guy with the gold grillle was saying): "You gots roll! Well I gots roll too!"

[lupinus]

Bad you have been, pay the fine you must!