Dear nine-year old patient

[MillCreek]

I understand how a girl of your age can get into a tiff with her mother.  Sometimes, this even happens at the medical clinic.  Sometimes we decide that we just cannot stand to be around the other person, and we decide to walk 12 miles home from the clinic in a driving rainstorm.  

However, we should not wait until mom uses the restroom and then book it out of the clinic and start hightailing it down the road.  If we are going to do this, we should tell a staff member about it so they don't worry.  And worry the staff did when mom came out of the restroom and could not find you.  There was much paging of an 'Amber Alert' and searching the clinic and grounds and police cars coming to visit the clinic.  One of those very same police cars found you about 15 minutes later trudging along a busy highway in the rain on your way back home.  The police brought you back to the clinic and it was not one of those tearful yet joyous reunions that you see on TV.  My staff had the vapors and I had to recommend that they go home after shift and drink heavily.  

[Blakenzy]

Fun and Games with Code Pink!! Code Pink!!

Although not quite...

[KD5NRH]

Sounds like a good argument for requiring children under 25 to be kenneled immediately upon arrival at the premises.

[SADShooter]

Sounds like a good argument for requiring children under 25 to be kenneled immediately upon arrival at the premises.

Nah, too cruel. A shock collar/lanyard leash with a wall or floor ring mount would be the way to go.

[dogmush]

Invisible fence / shock collar.

[41magsnub]

Garmin Alpha Training/GPS.

GPS Tracking, beep for recall, and can shock them if they ignore the beeps.

[lupinus]

All spawn must be on a non retractable leash six foot in length or less.

[MillCreek]

Sounds like a good argument for requiring children under 25 to be kenneled immediately upon arrival at the premises.

Sometimes at night I dream of a cattle squeeze chute in all my clinics.  I would use it only on the 'special' patients.  They would be firmly yet safely restrained while we fix them up and then let them run free off into the corral parking lot.

[brimic]

Need to put the "all unattended children will be given free Red Bull and puppies" sign up.

[BlueStarLizzard]

I feel bad for the kid.

Hell, I was that kid. She probably had no clue anyone would be upset like that.

Obviously, you would know if she was just being a brat or not, better than I, but if she wasn't, she probably feels even more rotten now that she had all those folks worried.

[Ron]

Working in a retail environment I get to experience on a monthly/every other month the same type of situations (generally much quicker in resolution though!).

My store uses the "Code Adam" procedure for lost kids. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Code_Adam

Everyone knows their roles and drops everything when Code Adam comes over the radio. Usually they resolve quickly but on occasion the child is particularly clever and it takes a while before they are discovered hiding.

When the minutes drag out too long it is maddening and approaches dread of the unthinkable.

Thankfully abductions are incredibly rare. The chances of working in a retail store during an actual abduction probably are the same odds as winning the Powerball.

It's a worthwhile program just for the efficiency and speed in which lost or wandered off children are reunited with their parents.     

[Jamisjockey]

I'm impressed that a 9 year old would know their way home from that far away.

[wmenorr67]

How old are your children?  I bet they can do it.

[vaskidmark]

I'm impressed that a 9 year old would know their way home from that far away.

Children of helicopter parents may not be able to recognize landmarks when seen from a perspective other than the middle seat of a minivan.  Free range kids probably know how to figure out the general direction and head that way till they hit known landmarks.  And then use any of three routes that keep them on the sidewalk/edge of the street along with a few that cut through/across alleys, playgrounds, school yards and the like.

At that age I was navigating my way across cities I had never been to before, with no tourist map.  I think my parents were more disappointed that I was not abducted by gypsies and sold into slavery than they were impressed that I was successful.  (and strangely, I sucked at land navigation in the wlld)

stay safe.

[Jamisjockey]

How old are your children?  I bet they can do it.

Maybe the 9 year old.  The 11 year old might not be able to find his ass with both hands.

[cassandra and sara's daddy]

It's funny how different 2 kids can be. Some folks can't see/accept that.


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