As most have said, it depends on the kid. Mine's a pretty calm kid, although it's obvious he's all boy. We take a fairly calm, straightforward approach to behavior issues with him. My nephew, on the other hand, is a chihuahua-like, constantly-on-the-edge-of critical-mass ball of energy that really needs to be constantly watched.
In general, the article isn't far off, although:
"It's not fair."Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, a mom of two and author of "Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles," recommends asking your child to start over and try again with less irritating words, such as "Can we please talk about this?" or "Mom, I don't like that rule."
Um, no. Responses like this leave the child thinking he has some say in the House Rules. That may be okay when they're 16-17, but not when they're six. At that age, they need the parents to be in control and set the limits.
"You're not the boss of me."In a calmer moment, Petersen realized that what her daughter really wanted was control. When her mom gave her options (like "Do you want to do the top buckle or the bottom buckle?"), Eleanor was far more likely to cooperate. You can even head off "You're not the boss of me" by teaching your child to say, "I'd like a choice," instead.
Okay in some spots, not so much in others. If I tell my boy to get dressed for school, there's no choice in the matter. Granted, it's his option to wear the hooded sweatshirt or the sweater, but he is getting dressed, period.
280Plus has a really good point with this gem:
Temper tantrums only lead to definitely not getting our way. A temper tantrum means discussion over and the kid loses.
The surest way for my boy to not get what he wants is to scream and yell about it.