I really don't care what everyone's silly "neopronouns" are. If I'm referring to them using a pronoun (other than "you"), they are not a part of the conversation nor are they even present. So it's none of their f'in' business. (if they are present while I am talking to someone else, I will refer to them by name)
I note you have chosen to use "them" as a gender neutral singular pronoun here.
I loathe that "them" has morphed from a plural-exclusive pronoun to a genderless single pronoun. Honestly, it's ground I refuse to yield.
I still stand on this ground:
Pronouns are a form of shorthand used by Party A, when talking to Party B, about Party C. The intent when using pronouns is for Party B to understand what Party A is saying. The feelz of Party C do not come into the equation, and cannot. Pronouns are for fast transactions, not lengthy contracts and intimate associations. When Party A needs Party B to pick up the bag that belongs to Party C, then A will say "Go pick up his bag and hand it to him." Doesn't matter what Party C is, really. It's just "get the thing and give it to the owner." Could be Pat from SNL, could be a dude with leg hair sticking out his panty hose while wearing a tube top, could be a butch shaved head chick with a sock stuffed in her crotch for a bulge. A and B don't give a flying *expletive deleted*ck about C's feelings, and don't need to. They just need to give C his stuff to get him moving on his way.
The direct or indirect object has no say in the use of 3rd person pronouns between the first and second person participants of the conversation.
In short, pronouns are just like the old joke: "This is a conversation between A and B. You can go ahead and C your way out of the conversation."