« previous next »
Pages: 1 2 [3]

Author Topic: Tips for exasperating the wife.  (Read 14855 times)

Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas

  • Webley Juggler
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4,415
  • All I got is a fistful of shekels
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #50 on: June 08, 2009, 10:14:43 PM »
Quote
If you had a set of inside shoes, and a set of outside shoes, then I wouldn't see a problem wearing the inside shoes around the house, except I would think you were eccentric for wearing shoes in the house.
Somebody's got some unresolved issues with Mr. Rogers.  :laugh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-tUd_Ji-AY
Report to moderator   Logged

CNYCacher

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4,438
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #51 on: June 09, 2009, 12:15:59 PM »
Mr Rogers pulls a jedi mind trick on Congress (1969)

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2883185966575573317

A great video depicting a great man.
Report to moderator   Logged
On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
Charles Babbage

CNYCacher

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4,438
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #52 on: June 09, 2009, 12:24:03 PM »
She tends to ask questions in the negative, such as "Are you not showering this morning?" I will answer logically with "no".  Then she is surprised to find me in the shower a few minutes later.
Report to moderator   Logged
On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
Charles Babbage

seeker_two

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 12,922
  • In short, most intelligence is false.
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #53 on: June 09, 2009, 12:33:02 PM »
I used to work a lot to frustrate her (esp. poking fun at her rubber shoes (Crocs), but I haven't had to do much lately....esp. since we got a new puppy that considers my wife's rubber shoes (Crocs) her favorite chew toy...esp. when the puppy can scatter every pair she owns around our house....you should see the faces my wife makes...  =D

...funny thing is....the puppy doesn't even bother my Crocs....   =|
Report to moderator   Logged
Impressed yet befogged, they grasped at his vivid leading phrases, seeing only their surface meaning, and missing the deeper current of his thought.

charby

  • Necromancer
  • Administrator
  • Senior Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 29,295
  • APS's Resident Sikh/Muslim
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #54 on: June 09, 2009, 01:26:33 PM »
Quote from: seeker_two on June 09, 2009, 12:33:02 PM
I used to work a lot to frustrate her (esp. poking fun at her rubber shoes (Crocs), but I haven't had to do much lately....esp. since we got a new puppy that considers my wife's rubber shoes (Crocs) her favorite chew toy...esp. when the puppy can scatter every pair she owns around our house....you should see the faces my wife makes...  =D

...funny thing is....the puppy doesn't even bother my Crocs....   =|

My weim is the same way, drags my wife's shoes all over the house, doesn't care about mine. The lab would occasionally take on of my wife's shoes from her bathroom and drop in the middle of the living room.

Now why in tar-nation do women feel the need to leave their shoes in the bathroom?

Report to moderator   Logged
Iowa- 88% more livable that the rest of the US

Uranus is a gas giant.

Team 444: Member# 536

Physics

  • ∇xE=-1/c·∂B/∂t, ∇·E=4πρ, ∇·B=0, ∇xB=1/c·∂E/∂t, F=q(E+v/cxB)
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1,315
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #55 on: June 09, 2009, 01:28:51 PM »
Quote from: Marnoot on June 08, 2009, 10:02:36 PM
I'm mostly a fan of at least being able to wear shoes inside, so I don't have to re-shod if I want to go outside for something real quick. That said I also enjoy walking around shoeless, especially after a Saturday of manual labor, etc. I just try to keep my shoes clean when I come in.

I was raised wearing shoes inside.  My wife was not.  Only problem is that my shoes account for about 1% of the dirt in my apartment.  The dogs are about 95%, considering the dalmation puts out hair like a wig factory.  Wife still yells at me EVERY TIME I forget to take off my shoes.  She gets so mad about that. So my feet stay cold.  Not that I have to worry about looking undignified, my holy socks match my holy jeans and (un)holy slayer t-shirt.   =D

ETA:  That Mr. Rogers video was amazing.  Jedi mind trick indeed!  Quote at the end was very good. 
« Last Edit: June 09, 2009, 01:57:40 PM by Physics »
Report to moderator   Logged
In the world of science, there is physics.  Everything else is stamp collecting.  -Ernest Rutherford

Jamisjockey

  • Booze-fueled paragon of pointless cruelty and wanton sadism
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 26,580
  • Your mom sends me care packages
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #56 on: June 09, 2009, 01:57:34 PM »
Keys.  I like to make sure our keys are hanging up on the keyhooks in our laundry room.  wife likes to throw them in her purse.  I pull them out and hang them up.  She can't find them.  That usually works.
Report to moderator   Logged
JD

 The price of a lottery ticket seems to be the maximum most folks are willing to risk toward the dream of becoming a one-percenter. “Robert Hollis”

Scout26

  • I'm a leaf on the wind.
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 25,997
  • I spent a week in that town one night....
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #57 on: June 09, 2009, 02:13:14 PM »
Why are you guys letting your wives wear shoes ??  =D =D =D =D

[promptly ducks into into bunker, slams and seals the hatch in prepartion for Ladysmith's incoming shoe barrage]
Report to moderator   Logged
Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.


Bring me my Broadsword and a clear understanding.
Get up to the roundhouse on the cliff-top standing.
Take women and children and bed them down.
Bless with a hard heart those that stand with me.
Bless the women and children who firm our hands.
Put our backs to the north wind.
Hold fast by the river.
Sweet memories to drive us on,
for the motherland.

seeker_two

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 12,922
  • In short, most intelligence is false.
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #58 on: June 09, 2009, 03:35:50 PM »
Quote from: scout26 on June 09, 2009, 02:13:14 PM
Why are you guys letting your wives wear shoes ??  =D =D =D =D

[promptly ducks into into bunker, slams and seals the hatch in prepartion for Ladysmith's incoming shoe barrage]

You know....this is perfect example of a question that answers itself....
Report to moderator   Logged
Impressed yet befogged, they grasped at his vivid leading phrases, seeing only their surface meaning, and missing the deeper current of his thought.

Scout26

  • I'm a leaf on the wind.
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 25,997
  • I spent a week in that town one night....
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #59 on: June 09, 2009, 03:57:10 PM »
Quote from: seeker_two on June 09, 2009, 03:35:50 PM
You know....this is perfect example of a question that answers itself....

Perxactly, if she wasn't allowed to wear shoes, she wouldn't have any to throw. =D =D
Report to moderator   Logged
Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.


Bring me my Broadsword and a clear understanding.
Get up to the roundhouse on the cliff-top standing.
Take women and children and bed them down.
Bless with a hard heart those that stand with me.
Bless the women and children who firm our hands.
Put our backs to the north wind.
Hold fast by the river.
Sweet memories to drive us on,
for the motherland.

LadySmith

  • friends
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3,166
  • Veni, Vidi, Jactavi Calceos
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #60 on: June 10, 2009, 03:03:57 AM »
Quote from: scout26 on June 09, 2009, 03:57:10 PM
Perxactly, if she wasn't allowed to wear shoes, she wouldn't have any to throw. =D =D

If I didn't have any shoes to throw, I'd have to seriously consider another option.
My kukhri was delivered yesterday. (Thanks AmbulanceDriver!)
Report to moderator   Logged
Rogue AI searching for amusement and/or Ellie Mae imitator searching for critters.
"What doesn't kill me makes me stronger...and it also makes me a cat-lover" - The Viking
According to Ben, I'm an inconvenient anomaly (and proud of it!).

BryanP

  • friendly hermit
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2,808
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #61 on: June 10, 2009, 08:01:29 AM »
You could always make a joke like this:

Report to moderator   Logged
"Inaccurately attributed quotes are the bane of the internet" - Abraham Lincoln

Crow1108

  • New Member
  • Posts: 30
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #62 on: June 13, 2009, 03:11:23 PM »
Quote
You and me both, haha!  I've come to realize that me, just existing, makes my wife mad.

Me too. My wife also likes to channel the things that irritate her about America into being pissed at me (IE: we aren't as considerate as the Japanese). Her bathtub was draining slowly, so she gets me to call the apartment maintenance guy. The guy asks if I have a toilet plunger, which I obligingly let him use. She was mortified, and she kept repeating "Japanese people would never do that!" She's still pissed at me as of this morning  :O.
Report to moderator   Logged
"I work in the back. I see no smiles."--"Bruce Allmighty"

RaspberrySurprise

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2,020
  • Yub yub Commander
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #63 on: June 13, 2009, 03:14:25 PM »
Quote from: Crow1108 on June 13, 2009, 03:11:23 PM
Me too. My wife also likes to channel the things that irritate her about America into being pissed at me (IE: we aren't as considerate as the Japanese). Her bathtub was draining slowly, so she gets me to call the apartment maintenance guy. The guy asks if I have a toilet plunger, which I obligingly let him use. She was mortified, and she kept repeating "Japanese people would never do that!" She's still pissed at me as of this morning  :O.


Is your wife Japanese or just odd?
Report to moderator   Logged
Look, tiny text!

Crow1108

  • New Member
  • Posts: 30
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #64 on: June 13, 2009, 03:37:52 PM »
Quote from: RaspberrySurprise on June 13, 2009, 03:14:25 PM
Is your wife Japanese or just odd?

She is Japanese.
Report to moderator   Logged
"I work in the back. I see no smiles."--"Bruce Allmighty"

seeker_two

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 12,922
  • In short, most intelligence is false.
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #65 on: June 13, 2009, 06:46:15 PM »
Quote from: RaspberrySurprise on June 13, 2009, 03:14:25 PM
Is your wife Japanese or just odd?

Why does it have to be "either--or"?....  =D
Report to moderator   Logged
Impressed yet befogged, they grasped at his vivid leading phrases, seeing only their surface meaning, and missing the deeper current of his thought.

Jamisjockey

  • Booze-fueled paragon of pointless cruelty and wanton sadism
  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 26,580
  • Your mom sends me care packages
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #66 on: June 13, 2009, 07:09:15 PM »
Grab her butt in public.
Aim camera down cleavage.
Report to moderator   Logged
JD

 The price of a lottery ticket seems to be the maximum most folks are willing to risk toward the dream of becoming a one-percenter. “Robert Hollis”

Headless Thompson Gunner

  • friend
  • Senior Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 8,517
Re: Tips for exasperating the wife.
« Reply #67 on: June 13, 2009, 10:17:30 PM »
I like to unhook my wife's bra when she's not expecting it.  I can just walk up behind her and undo it with one hand, in one quick motion, through her shirt.

Advice: Don't unhook your wife's strapless bra in public, as this seems to cause purple and green marks on your shin.
Report to moderator   Logged
Pages: 1 2 [3]
« previous next »