That darn George Bush!
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http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=4349
Bush Still Causing Job Losses and Hardship
The People's Cube -> The Daily Truth
#1: Bush Still Causing Job Losses and Hardship Author: Commodore Snoogie Woogums, Location: Japan PostPosted: 11/15/2009, 7:00 am
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Dozens of local area workers were left jobless yesterday as the doors closed on their workplace after more than nine years of frisky business. Devastated staff at the "I Hate Bush T-Shirt and Vendor Wear" factory wept as the moment they were dreading finally became a reality: the firm went into bankruptcy in result of sagging orders for their goods and slim prospects for a renewed demand in the future.
"The management can say whatever they want, but I personally blame Bush," said Fred Fluger, a longtime employee, as he carried home a storage box filled with "I Hate Bush" shirts, sweaters, boxers, beach towels, and pajamas, with which the cash-stripped company had been paying its workers for the last three months.
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"It's clearly Bush's fault because he disappeared from the news and stopped making dumb statements, leaving it to Obama to bring him up all the time" fumed Fred Fluger. "Why can't he poke his nose around in world affairs? Hell, even Carter can be counted on to make a post-presidential idiotic statement. What's up with this 'dignified retirement'? I'm sure Bush is doing this with some evil purpose, just like when he blew up the Twin Towers to become a fascist dictator for life, or destroyed New Orleans to test his weather machine. I think Bush hates us and our values. I really do. His silence is a ploy to hurt us and to diminish demand for our selfless work."
"Bush doesn't want us to continue to prosper like we did during his presidency, when everybody had jobs and could afford to spend money on 'I Hate Bush' T-shirts, and we couldn't keep up with demand, and times then were good, so good!" Mr. Fluger then began to sob and mutter incoherently to himself, as he realized how good he really had it when George Bush was in office.
Emotions ran high at the "I Hate Bush" factory which for nine years provided employment, healthcare, union benefits, and subsidized mortgages for its diverse staff, most of whom were now blaming Bush for the closure and bankruptcy.
But there also were dissenters. "Not to let Bush off the hook, but I also blame capitalist markets," said Keith Matthews, a marketing expert and multiple winner of the factory's prestigious "Malcontent of the Month" award. "Why must our lives depend on demand for our products? In a normal, centrally-planned, government-subsidized economy, we would be making 'I Hate Bush' shirts for many years until we retire, and then our children would continue our work, without any changes in design or technology, with guaranteed employment for generations to come. That's why I'm so disappointed in Obama. If he keeps letting us down, in the next election I'll vote for Nader."
The factory did try to fight back. But the idea to re-tool the T-shirt line with pro-Obama slogans was dashed by the recent elections in Virginia and New Jersey, which the management said was the final writing on the wall.
There have also been rumors of a large grant from the NEA Foundation, to keep the factory alive as a taxpayer-funded artistic community. However, the dreams of working families were brutally crushed by the right-wing media's attacks on the Foundation's progressive effort, which linked NEA grants to endorsing Obama's policies. Their baseless claims that the NEA was somehow using taxpayer dollars for leftist propaganda forced Foundation's leaders to withdraw the "I Hate Bush" subsidy.
The 51 employees, some of whom have been with the firm from the very beginning, said an emotional private farewell to each other in the Organic Foods Lunchroom at the factory.
Andrew Laing, 52, a worker with a seven-year experience, said: "It's a very dark day for all of us. Nine years of history all gone. Damn you, George Bush! Why can't you just honestly say something nasty about Obama so we can all get frothed up in a frenzy again and keep our jobs? Why must you be so sneakily silent, depriving us of our livelihood? Why must you be so evil? Damn you! Damn you to hell!"
Andrew Laing's daughter Audrey, 35, was also there, supporting her father. "I had hoped the factory would last until after Christmas," said Audrey Laing, who had no job at the company but depended upon her father's income for sustenance.
"Who wouldn't like to get an organic, fair-trade 'I Hate Bush' T-shirt as a holiday gift from their loved ones? It was so selfish to close now. We all know that Christmas is a corporate ploy to boost profits in the last quarter of the fiscal year when the bourgeois like to go shopping for stuff. Buck Fush!"
"My daughter is so smart because she went to college," the father beams proudly, but his smile quickly gives way to the usual concerned look: "That's why the greedy corporate bastards refuse to hire her. Thankfully, she collects disability for her dyslexia."
Mr. Laing agrees about Christmas, adding that "if only the factory lasted until the right-wingers regained the majority in Congress in 2010, we could replace 'I Hate Bush' with the name of some other Republican hatemonger designated for this role by the progressive community. The right-wingers would cut taxes and then the people would have more money to fight them by wearing anti-right-wing shirts. The sales would pick up and we could keep our jobs."
But even in these difficult times there still may be help. An investors group associated with Fox News is said to be interested in purchasing the factory building and using laid-off workers to support recently added news staff - an expansion caused by the network's ever increasing ratings.
Most factory workers, however, including Mr. Fluger and Mr. Laing, stated they would never work for any outfit that has the word "Fox" in its name. "I'd rather have my skin pierced with a thousand nipple rings and dive into a vat of rubbing alcohol before I would lower myself to work for those heathens," said Mr. Fluger.
The only other opportunity for the laid-off workers seems to be at a nearby tea factory, where demand for the product has taken an unexpected upturn since the election of Obama as President. "I think the tea business and all the parties associated with it are going to be a real booming concern the next couple of years," Mr. Fluger said.
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