Author Topic: No-slam toilet seats  (Read 28752 times)

InfidelSerf

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #75 on: August 08, 2011, 11:52:52 PM »
ok I'll throw my .02 in here.
I am of the belief that all that's ALL toilet seats AND lids should be left in the down position.
Both genders benefit from the act of closing the seat and lid.
Males: By opening both the lid and seat accomplishing our mission and then closing both the seat and the lid.
We protected the seat from any splatter that might have occurred, which we would not want should #2 urge come along.
We also maintain peace and harmony with the fairer sex.

Females: Since the Male in the house was in the habit of lifting both seat and lid neither are too dirty to touch by hand and lift.  Once done the female exerts the same amount of effort the male had to by then closing the lid.

Both genders benefit from not having the microscopic germs fly into the air once the flush has been engaged.
Both genders also exert the same amount of effort.

The exception is the Uni in public restrooms.. all U seats should be UP at all times and only brought into position when one needs to sit.
This way both genders (in the case of a unisex bathroom) preserve the seat from any unnecessary sear splatter.
Ladies you can't argue this one. 
Trust me
If you insist on the Useat being left down too.. then don't tell me I didn't warn you.
You have to understand that it's simply a challenge, a game.  And we all suck at it.
We've all tried it but it's never possible. 
The splatter free hole in one attempt on a seat. 
We hardly ever try it at home because we know it's futile and the seats fully encompass the rim of the toilet.
But when out in public the odds shift.  Suddenly your faced with an advantage.


So my advice is make EVERYONE in the household put the seat and lid up and put them down or just the lid up and down.
Either way we all equally work at keeping the cohabited commode circumstances clean.

And I must say the no slam kits are pretty slick.. I love being able to just tap the top of the lid and not worry about touching it to close it.  The cleanliness value right there pays for it.   Not to mention the lifespan increase it should have not being slammed every few uses.
The hour is fast approaching,on which the Honor&Success of this army,and the safety of our bleeding Country depend.Remember~Soldiers,that you are Freemen,fighting for the blessings of Liberty-that slavery will be your portion,and that of your posterity,if you do not acquit yourselves like men.GW8/76

Scout26

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #76 on: August 09, 2011, 03:27:06 AM »
....and the WINO wanted me to yell at our son when she caught him peeing in the back yard (I want to say he was 4 maybe 5 years old).   He looked at me and said "The dog does it."   

I looked at her and said "I can't argue that" and walked away.




Yep, that was one of the better fights..
Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.


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Get up to the roundhouse on the cliff-top standing.
Take women and children and bed them down.
Bless with a hard heart those that stand with me.
Bless the women and children who firm our hands.
Put our backs to the north wind.
Hold fast by the river.
Sweet memories to drive us on,
for the motherland.

280plus

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #77 on: August 09, 2011, 06:29:28 AM »
We could solve this whole mess once and for all and just start installing urinals in our bathrooms.  ;)
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CNYCacher

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #78 on: August 09, 2011, 09:23:09 AM »
We could solve this whole mess once and for all and just start installing urinals in our bathrooms.  ;)

I really thought about it but went with a tot pot instead
On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
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HeroHog

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #79 on: August 09, 2011, 10:13:28 AM »
Wow. Anyone but me see the huge potential for disaster with that setup?
I might not last very long or be very effective but I'll be a real pain in the ass for a minute!
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CNYCacher

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #80 on: August 09, 2011, 11:02:17 AM »
Wow. Anyone but me see the huge potential for disaster with that setup?

I guess not.  I'm listening
On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], "Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?" I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
Charles Babbage

seeker_two

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #81 on: August 09, 2011, 11:07:04 AM »
Wow. Anyone but me see the huge potential for disaster with that setup?

Not really....but the reading room could get a little crowded.....
Impressed yet befogged, they grasped at his vivid leading phrases, seeing only their surface meaning, and missing the deeper current of his thought.

HeroHog

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #82 on: August 09, 2011, 11:19:54 AM »
I'm thinking either drunk/sleepy, wrong hole, hilarity ensues, wife yells "I'm not cleaning THAT up..."
I might not last very long or be very effective but I'll be a real pain in the ass for a minute!
MOLON LABE!

Tallpine

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #83 on: August 09, 2011, 12:02:45 PM »
We could solve the whole issue if we just went back to outhouses  :P

(the kind with a hole cut in the boards - none of them there fancy seats and lids )
Freedom is a heavy load, a great and strange burden for the spirit to undertake. It is not easy. It is not a gift given, but a choice made, and the choice may be a hard one. The road goes upward toward the light; but the laden traveller may never reach the end of it.  - Ursula Le Guin

MrsSmith

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #84 on: August 09, 2011, 12:57:46 PM »
Nope, Tallpine, not going the way of the outhouse. Did consider it when the kids were little though.
I think Infidel has the right idea. Let the training begin.
America is at that awkward stage; It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards. ~ Claire Wolfe

Tallpine

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Re: No-slam toilet seats
« Reply #85 on: August 09, 2011, 03:18:06 PM »
Nope, Tallpine, not going the way of the outhouse. Did consider it when the kids were little though.

There was a time when that would have been an improvement - back when it was more "out" than house  :lol:

Was up at a remote cabin in Alaska one time, and I had to take my turn to go down over the hill to "the log."  Right in the middle of business a Supercub flew over, real low and slow as is the habit up there.  What could I do but wave?  :angel:
Freedom is a heavy load, a great and strange burden for the spirit to undertake. It is not easy. It is not a gift given, but a choice made, and the choice may be a hard one. The road goes upward toward the light; but the laden traveller may never reach the end of it.  - Ursula Le Guin