Stop! Or I'll can you!

[Fly320s]

Canned food as a defensive tool.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/01/13/alabama-principal-seeks-cans-food-to-defend-against-intruders-790312695/?intcmp=latestnews

[vaskidmark]

Years ago school security "experts" were recommending that kids throw books at the intruder/shooter, or pummel them with their book bags/backpacks.

What goes around comes around?

stay safe.

[BobR]

I can remember years ago a guy was in his kitchen when someone (intruder) came in the back door so the resident beaned him with a can of stew. The intruder died from his injuries. I am pretty sure it happened in Oklahoma, but my google-foo has failed me.

bob

[K Frame]

I read years ago in, IIRC, Playboy that a guy came up to the counter of a small store with a couple of cans of food, put them on the counter, then laid out his rather large junk on the counter as if he expected the comely lass behind the register to ring it up.

She did, by apparently picking up one of the cans of food and slamming it down on his penis several times.

When he came to the police were handcuffing him.

[BobR]

We had a physician beat about the head and shoulders by a disgruntled Vet with a can of peas in a sock. If they give the kids cans of food I hope they remember the sock to go with it, it is fairly effective.

bob

[griz]

Once you get to the point of stocking canned goods for the admitted sole purpose of defense it shows two things:

1. You just violated your own policy because the cans serve no other purpose than that of weapons.

2. Your policy is stupid because, as you have just argued, it makes sense to defend yourself and a can of soup is a poor substitute for a real defensive tool.

[KD5NRH]

2. Your policy is stupid because, as you have just argued, it makes sense to defend yourself and a can of soup is a poor substitute for a real defensive tool.

Throwing cans would be pretty lame, but when I had to sometimes carry small loads of groceries home through a rough neighborhood, I would rearrange to get one can alone in a bag, in my right hand.  It's not going to last more than one hit, but if that's in a good spot, it's a hell of an opening move.

[AJ Dual]

I have a can. I could help.

Perhaps I could be stationed in the library where it's like, important to be quiet and stuff...

[Firethorn]

2. Your policy is stupid because, as you have just argued, it makes sense to defend yourself and a can of soup is a poor substitute for a real defensive tool.

Could it be a reaction to a higher level policy?

IE The head of the school *district*, perhaps even state level declares 'NO WEAPONS!!!', complete with a set of definitions for what's a weapon(and canned food doesn't count).

Having to operate under these conditions, but unwilling to leave his school completely defenseless, the principle suggests this.  Or he could be using it to get into the news so he can put political/social pressure on his district.

Personally I'd keep in mind that the foods edible and dual purpose:
1.  Encourage kids to bring in cans of stuff that can be eaten directly from the can or prepared on site, such as with nothing more than a microwave and a few dishes you can empty the cans into.  Voila, emergency defensive tool AND food in an emergency.  Kids get locked into schools a lot more than they get shot up in them, after all.  Some food in their bellies makes that more tolerable, even if it's just canned fruit and such.
2.  Donate it to charity at the end of the school year.

[K Frame]

Given that every school in the country already issues stabbing weapons in the guise of the Faber or Ticonderoga No. 2 pencil, why don't the train the little pischers to descend on a miscreant and poke him full of holes?

[seeker_two]

And what happens when one student hits another student with his can? Will he face disciplinary action for using a weapon that the school district ordered him to have?

Sent from my HTC One using Tapatalk

[SADShooter]

Given the discussions of food preservation here, my first thought on seeing the title was completely different...

[wmenorr67]

Maybe we can go out and con people into trading in their firearms for canned goods. 

[Firethorn]

Given the discussions of food preservation here, my first thought on seeing the title was completely different...

I had what I think was the same thought as well and had a good laugh when I first saw the thread title.  I wonder how many cans it would take.  Or would jars be preferred?

[griz]

Could it be a reaction to a higher level policy?

IE The head of the school *district*, perhaps even state level declares 'NO WEAPONS!!!', complete with a set of definitions for what's a weapon(and canned food doesn't count).

I didn't think of that, but for the sake of the kids that have to figure out the logic in these contradictions, I hope you are right.

[MechAg94]

Wouldn't a bucket of rocks in each class be cheaper and easier?  Stoning can be considered part of history class.  Maybe they could just re-floor the class rooms with cobblestones or small bricks. 

Are they going to reinstate Dodge Ball as a school defense training program?

[Firethorn]

kids that have to figure out the logic in these contradictions

A valuable life lesson!

[vaskidmark]

So, is that a can in your pocket or are you really glad to see me?

stay safe.

[HankB]

Maybe we can go out and con people into trading in their firearms for canned goods. 

Obama can demonstrate leadership by ordering his Secret Service protection detail to turn in their Sigs for cans of sardines.

The Marines will substitute cans of chile (vegetarian, of course) for their M4s.

(Hey, if you're going to seriously propose the absurd, why not go FULL retard?)

[KD5NRH]

Obama can demonstrate leadership by ordering his Secret Service protection detail to turn in their Sigs for cans of sardines.

The Marines will substitute cans of chile (vegetarian, of course) for their M4s.

(Hey, if you're going to seriously propose the absurd, why not go FULL retard?)

Will #10 cans be used for artillery?

Naval guns firing 55 gallon drums of mayonnaise?