Grade school age youngster in church on a Sunday morning.
Hard wooden pews.
Horrible timing, but painful abdominal gas pressure - released.
You could've heard a pin drop - but our pastor still shook my hand and thanked us for attending on the way out after the service.
"Wait 'til we get home and I tell your father, young man!"
Yeah, Mom, whaddya think he'll say?
Of course, he said exactly what I thought he would.
Dad - "Did you tell the folks around you there was a barking spider running loose?"
Mom - "Don't encourage the boy!"
34 years later, I find myself teaching the finer things in life to my 6 year-old nephew. My sister is a an absolute riot, but I think I'll leave some things for her to teach her son...