Although hitting and spanking might have the same literal definition. They are vastly different things.
Spanking is a discipline, a training of a foolish mind. It is preceded and followed by loving instruction and guidance.
Hitting is combat, an exertion of power whether for kill or dominance. It is not love, it is self will.
The same thing cassandrasdaddy said.
Leave the anger out of it.
I find the most effective thing I can do with my kids (6 and 3, not yet sociopaths or teenagers) is to express displeasure with inappropriate actions. Yes, spanking expresses displeasure. So can an early bedtime, or other denial of autonomy.
I still think spanking is an acceptable tool, but so is a 1911.
ANALOGY ALERT!!!
I don't pull out the 1911 when the neighbor's dog poops on my lawn.
I rarely spank.
Now, I believe verbal abuse can be as (more?) damaging than a well timed and rational swat on the butt. Have seen sickening public verbal punishments.
an aside.... My best friend is named Kevin. My six year old was busting my chops last night calling Kevin my "Sweetheart" and my "CutiePie love bunny".
I said, IN GOOD HUMOR that's fine, we'll see if your still laughing after the spanking.
She kept it up, and asked if I'd just wait till bedtime and spank her until she fell asleep.
Oh, this thread has caused some introspection over the last day.
Forgiveness? Most of the time.
Thank You for the forum.