Author Topic: Stargate the movie... (Read 15359 times)

Perd Hapley · « **Reply #50 on:** March 23, 2008, 09:20:16 PM »

Don't make Tecumseh have to go and look up "comprehension."

HankB · « **Reply #51 on:** March 24, 2008, 04:54:15 AM »

Quote from: Mike Irwin on March 23, 2008, 07:07:46 PM

"Time to trot out your reading comprehension skills, folks...

I said it's a CONTENDER for the worst movie ever made.

Not that it is the worst movie ever made."

Nope, Stargate wouldn't even make the Top Ten (or Bottom Ten?) list of movies in a "Worst Movie" contest, so it wouldn't even be a contender.

Zardoz, now, that is a real contender for "Worst Movie." Perhaps the favorite for the award.

Doc Savage, The Man of Bronze, is another contender for "Worst Movie" as well as "Most Inappropriate Soundtrack" honors.

Water World, which begins with the hero drinking his own filtered urine, and goes down from there, is a contender.

Jarhead, which portrayed Marines as screwballs with homoerotic undertones, was worse.

Sahara, which involved a lost treasure ship in the middle of the desert . . .

The Day After Tomorrow, with its global-warming ice age . . .

Signs, Ishtar, 12 Monkeys . . . all were worse than Stargate.

When Women Had Tails . . . and it's sequel, When Women Lost Their Tails . . .

But Stargate? Uh uh. Not even a contender. Probably wouldn't even make the top 20 list of stinkers.

Perd Hapley · « **Reply #52 on:** March 24, 2008, 05:01:29 AM »

12 Monkeys is a good flick. Brad Pitt is great in roles like that.

K Frame · « **Reply #53 on:** March 24, 2008, 05:54:24 AM »

Your list is weak and pathetic, Hank.

Hardly a worst movie keeper in there.

mtnbkr · « **Reply #54 on:** March 24, 2008, 05:57:21 AM »

Slugs! is a worthy addition. Not sure if it's bad or or so bad it's good. Lots of unintentional camp.

Chris

StopTheGrays · « **Reply #55 on:** March 24, 2008, 05:59:43 AM »

Quote from: Mike Irwin on March 22, 2008, 01:55:58 PM

serious, and I mean SERIOUS, contender for the worst movie ever.

The movie came out in 1994. Did you just see it for the first time recently or has this hate been stewing for 14 years?

K Frame · « **Reply #56 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:02:05 AM »

Saw it for the first time.

Manedwolf · « **Reply #57 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:06:05 AM »

Quote from: Mike Irwin on March 24, 2008, 05:02:05 AM

Saw it for the first time.

I suggest recovering by watching The Fifth Element, one of my all-time favorites, and one of the BEST science fiction films of the 1990's.

It's just sort of sad comparing the wonderfully hectic aerial taxi-chase scene in that movie to the boring airspeeder chase in Episode II. Lucas apparently didn't learn a thing.

K Frame · « **Reply #58 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:16:04 AM »

I like the Fifth Element. I've seen it a number of times.

If you really want to scrape bottom, though?

Yor, the Hunter from the Future.

How can you go wrong when the name of the main character is Reb Brown...

Silver Bullet · « **Reply #59 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:36:40 AM »

12 Monkeys is on my list of ten best sci-fi movies.

I didn't like Fifth Element.

Mabs2 · « **Reply #60 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:49:23 AM »

12 Monkeys is good.

seeker_two · « **Reply #61 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:51:35 AM »

Forget "contender".....we have a winner......

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094057/

....and my MOM made me watch it..... shocked

HankB · « **Reply #62 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:57:35 AM »

Quote from: Mike Irwin on March 24, 2008, 04:54:24 AM

Your list is weak and pathetic, Hank.

Hardly a worst movie keeper in there.

Says the man who calls Stargate a worst-movie contender, which is on a par with calling Pee-Wee Herman or Woody Allen contenders for Ultimate Fighting Champion. rolleyes

If you're looking for bad movies, oh, I suppose you can add in all manner of chop-socki Kung Fu movies or those old Italian sword-and-sandal Hercules movies, maybe some blackploitation films, but I tried to limit the list to things that actually made it into theaters with some budget behind them. (Except for the women & tails films . . . grin

)

K Frame · « **Reply #63 on:** March 24, 2008, 07:15:17 AM »

That's right, a Contender.

Doesn't mean that it IS the worst movie ever made.

As for Woody, hey, he took on Mia Farrow and won. That was ultimate.

Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas · « **Reply #64 on:** March 24, 2008, 03:39:17 PM »

Trouble is, the real 'worst movies' are low-budget pictures directed, produced, written, and acted by talentless nobodies (these movies fail on all counts - pathetic acting, story, filming). Zardoz is okay in many of the technical aspects... the actors seem to know their lines, pretty good camera work... the people involved had talent. Boorman had made a few major pictures, ditto for Connery. Zardoz is an atrocity of film-making. Talented, intelligent people collaborated to make a mind-boggling, loony film that jumps clear off the tracks halfway through. It's not the fault of the budget... it's Boorman to blame for writing something so moronic.
Still, it has a better ending than many other 'bad movies' do. The majority of the actors get shot up, which was sure to have garnered applause amongst moviegoers who stayed the whole time.
Connery in red underwear's weird (though there are many instances of idiotic costuming in better films)... but having a guy with a sharpied-on mustache is insane.

AJ Dual · « **Reply #65 on:** March 24, 2008, 04:22:37 PM »

Quote from: Geronimo45 on March 24, 2008, 02:39:17 PM

Trouble is, the real 'worst movies' are low-budget pictures directed, produced, written, and acted by talentless nobodies (these movies fail on all counts - pathetic acting, story, filming). Zardoz is okay in many of the technical aspects... the actors seem to know their lines, pretty good camera work... the people involved had talent. Boorman had made a few major pictures, ditto for Connery. Zardoz is an atrocity of film-making. Talented, intelligent people collaborated to make a mind-boggling, loony film that jumps clear off the tracks halfway through. It's not the fault of the budget... it's Boorman to blame for writing something so moronic.
Still, it has a better ending than many other 'bad movies' do. The majority of the actors get shot up, which was sure to have garnered applause amongst moviegoers who stayed the whole time.
Connery in red underwear's weird (though there are many instances of idiotic costuming in better films)... but having a guy with a sharpied-on mustache is insane.

But... But...

"The Gun is GOOD! The Penis is BAD!" cheesy

Silver Bullet · « **Reply #66 on:** March 24, 2008, 04:51:42 PM »

I liked Zardoz okay, red diapers notwithstanding. I liked the Wizard of Oz tie-in at the ending.

Of course, a much better Connery sci-fi movie was Outland.

Perd Hapley · « **Reply #67 on:** March 24, 2008, 06:55:24 PM »

Outland was not so great, either, although I like it when sci-fi movies can keep their wardrobe and weaponry down-to-earth. So many of them seem to say, "But it's space! We have to dress in jumpsuits and carry phaser-blasters!"

I just saw the second Pirates of the Caribbean. What a turkey. Nothing in the "plot" was the least bit interesting, but they insisted on drawing it out till I felt I had been on Davy Jones' ship for a hundred years.

Silver Bullet · « **Reply #68 on:** March 24, 2008, 08:22:27 PM »

Outland wasn't great, but it was satisfying in a certain outer space way. Not in my list of ten best.

Thirteenth Floor was, though. Has anybody seen that ?

Balog · « **Reply #69 on:** March 24, 2008, 08:25:03 PM »

The second Pirates did kinda suck, but Davy Jones had an awesome pipe.

Edit: ah, here it is.

Manedwolf · « **Reply #70 on:** March 24, 2008, 08:27:12 PM »

Quote from: fistful on March 24, 2008, 05:55:24 PM

I just saw the second Pirates of the Caribbean. What a turkey. Nothing in the "plot" was the least bit interesting, but they insisted on drawing it out till I felt I had been on Davy Jones' ship for a hundred years.

That was really a shame, as the first one was so much fun.

LadySmith · « **Reply #71 on:** March 25, 2008, 01:31:19 AM »

I want to see Zardoz now.
Sean Connery in bright red tactical Depends... cheesy

bedlamite · « **Reply #72 on:** March 25, 2008, 02:27:52 AM »

Quote from: LadySmith on March 25, 2008, 12:31:19 AM

I want to see Zardoz now.
Sean Connery in bright red tactical Depends... cheesy

The trailer is on youtube.

wmenorr67 · « **Reply #73 on:** March 25, 2008, 02:36:01 AM »

I am surprised the Sean Connery let them put that "outfit" on him and then film it for all eternity. Wouldn't be surprised if a few people didn't get hurt over that argument.

HankB · « **Reply #74 on:** March 25, 2008, 03:34:01 AM »

The only thing - and I mean the ONLY thing - remotely redeeming in Zardoz was the use of a Webley-Fosbery automatic revolver.

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Author Topic: Stargate the movie... (Read 15359 times)