No, not my jokes:
http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=ZWE1YWQ3N2M3Y2NhODBiYWM4ZDM1Njc2MjMwOTU5OGE=http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=Y2VhNTBlYjg5ZGM5YjkwMmI4MjcyNWI4NDg3ZWZkMGM=http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=OWNmMjEyMmNjNGM5NzE0ZTFhY2Q3YWE2N2FjNTE4NTY=Joke #1, Light bulb:Q: How many members of the Obama household does it take to screw in a light bulb?Various Answers:What light bulbs? The house is illumined by the light of his countenance.
Light bulbs? Ha! As a black man in America, Barack could get shot going to the hardware store.
Do you know how expensive light-bulb changing lessons are?
Yes, Michelle is right, two.
None, you try affording CFLs on a community organizers salary.
They don't use lightbulbs. The light from the halo is more than enough.
When Obama is president, light bulbs will screw in themselves.
Just The One. [jfruser--see Oprah]
One. Obama holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
In an effort to combat global warming, the Obama household uses only energy-efficient CFC bulbs, and it's been so long since they've had to be changed that nobody can remember exactly who changed them.
Only one member of the household is needed. He organizes several dozen community members to petition local government to allocate funds to send a team of municipal electricians. After several public hearings and the issuance of an official apology for the substandard bulb I'm not saying prejudice is involved, mind you, but it's funny how you never hear about light bulbs going out in Mitch McConnell's house poof, it's done.
Why would they? It will only take one to wreck the national energy system, so that it won't light up when you screw it in, anyway.
None. They just declare the sudden darkness to be The Change We've Been Waiting For.
Three: One to actually screw the light bulb in, the other two to throw Rev. Wright and Obamas grandmother under the bus for not screwing the light bulb in sooner.
1 to talk about how he'd change it, 1,000,000 to talk about how it's the most profound and eloquent speech about changing a light bulb ever given.
None. Screwing in lightbulbs is cynical and old-fashioned. Rather, they just let their hope inspire the change.
Three. One to screw in the lightbulb. One to smash it to pieces because its design is offensive to Muslims and Environmentalists. And one to deny that Obama knew anything about it and to fire everyone involved.
One. One woman. With no headscarf. Predominantly white, but with traces of southeast Asian ancestry. She must have masters in a field that ends with "studies" and her ex-husband should be under indictment for his failure to make child support payments.
The light bulb I see today is not the light bulb that I knew and that has lit my living room for so many years. I am disappointed.
Joke #2. BHO in a barQ: Barack Obama's sitting at a bar when a man comes up to him and says: "Wanna hear a Barack Obama joke?" Obama: "Er, hold on there, buddy I am Barack Obama." Only Answer So Far: "Oh. all right then, I'll tell it in Spanish."
Joke #3. Knock knockQ: "Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Barack Hussein Obama."
"Barack Hussein Obama who?"Various Answers "Barack Hussein Obama Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shönedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm."
That depends. Is this the primary or the general election?
Barack who's-sayin'-I'm-a-Muslim? Obama.
Barack who's-sayin'-whatever-he-must-to-get-your-vote Obama.
"Barack Hussein Obama."
"Thats inflammatory."
Barack Hussein Obama who? Well my dear sir, perhaps 300 hours of mandatory Community Service will refresh your memory. Take him away!
Barack Hussein Obama's brother, Sweet Home Al Obama.