Author Topic: Distance you live from your parents (Read 8374 times)

Grandpa Shooter · « **on:** January 28, 2009, 11:02:22 AM »

The tread I started about the 93 year old Vet who died of hypothermia got me thinking. How many of us live close enough to our parents to actually help them in their end years or an emergency?

I live over 3,000 miles from my Mother. I only go back when my brother and sister can't deal with her anymore. She gets mad at them and they back down. She has been mad at me since I was 12 so it doesn't matter much anymore.

Balog · « **Reply #1 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:04:07 AM »

I live about 1800ish miles from my family. I choose to live here in large part because it's so far from them.

AZRedhawk44 · « **Reply #2 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:06:51 AM »

Quote from: Balog on January 28, 2009, 11:04:07 AM

I live about 1800ish miles from my family. I choose to live here in large part because it's so far from them.

lol... +1.

I live about 75 miles away because I used to only live about 10 miles away. Saw them too often.

They're in their 50's and doing fine financially, so they don't need much help from me... I'm not opposed to moving a few states away for better climes.

makattak · « **Reply #3 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:13:32 AM »

Quote from: AZRedhawk44 on January 28, 2009, 11:06:51 AM

lol... +1.

I live about 75 miles away because I used to only live about 10 miles away. Saw them too often.

They're in their 50's and doing fine financially, so they don't need much help from me... I'm not opposed to moving a few states away for better climes.

Um.. you don't have a greater than 500 miles and less than 1000 miles option.

This is where I am.

Once my parents get to the point where care is needed, we will be much closer.

My parents-in-law are only about 150 miles away, though.

Declaration Day · « **Reply #4 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:16:30 AM »

I live within 25 miles of my entire family, except for two cousins who live in Northern MI. I have a piece of property just 12 miles from them.

BlueStarLizzard · « **Reply #5 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:19:23 AM »

well, i'm a bit younger and i still live with my dad and my mom only lives about ten miles away.

i have a feeling that when dad gets to that point he'll be pretty close by and as for mom, well, i'm not sure i really care (no, really, i care, but i doubt she is going very far either)

mtnbkr · « **Reply #6 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:19:34 AM »

You need a tighter option between less than 500 and more than 1000.

Until 2006, my parents lived about 200 miles away, but in 2006 my dad's company transferred him to Mobile, so now they're about 1000 miles away. At 58, they're hardly in their twilight years and my brother is nearby, but the hope is they'll move closer after retirement. That's a possibility since our entire family is here on the East Coast.

My grandparents (dad's dad and mom's mom) are the bigger issue since they're in their late 70s, but they're only 5hrs from here and both have a child and other relatives living near enough to help if needed. Also, since they didn't live like hermits, they have friends and neighbors who they are friendly with and can receive help from if necessary (and provide help to when needed as well).

Chris

Nick1911 · « **Reply #7 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:27:40 AM »

Quote from: mtnbkr on January 28, 2009, 11:19:34 AM

You need a tighter option between less than 500 and more than 1000.

Yes, there's a lot of space missing there.

I live a bit over 500 miles from my parents. It's close enough to make in an 8 hour drive.

Nightfall · « **Reply #8 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:34:48 AM »

Close to 3000 miles here. See 'em once a year or so.

Viking · « **Reply #9 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:36:14 AM »

Hm, I live about 5-6 kilometers from my parents. For now. Always looking to move somewhere more exciting.

Nick1911 · « **Reply #10 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:37:27 AM »

Quote from: The Viking on January 28, 2009, 11:36:14 AM

Hm, I live about 5-6 kilometers from my parents. For now. Always looking to move somewhere more exciting.

Well, I have a spare bedroom here in Kansas City...

Stetson · « **Reply #11 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:37:44 AM »

I'm about 180 miles from my Dad and 1300 miles from my mom.

Viking · « **Reply #12 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:40:07 AM »

Quote from: Nick1911 on January 28, 2009, 11:37:27 AM

Well, I have a spare bedroom here in Kansas City...

Thanks, but at this point (no Green Card) I'd have to wetback, and I'm not interested in that

.

Balog · « **Reply #13 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:47:22 AM »

Quote from: The Viking on January 28, 2009, 11:40:07 AM

Thanks, but at this point (no Green Card) I'd have to wetback, and I'm not interested in that .

That'd be a hell of a swim.....

Fjolnirsson · « **Reply #14 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:51:06 AM »

Quote from: Balog on January 28, 2009, 11:04:07 AM

I live about 1800ish miles from my family. I choose to live here in large part because it's so far from them.

Exactly. I picked "more than 1000 miles", because it was the nearest option. I am actually about 900 miles away, over a significant mountain pass. And I like it that way.

Viking · « **Reply #15 on:** January 28, 2009, 11:54:18 AM »

Quote from: Balog on January 28, 2009, 11:47:22 AM

That'd be a hell of a swim.....

Duh! I'd build a raft of course!

cassandra and sara's daddy · « **Reply #16 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:05:37 PM »

waters cold too and deep

i mtried to get dad to let me build him a place on my lot or an empty one a 3 lots away
he said no

charby · « **Reply #17 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:07:47 PM »

I live 200 miles from my parents and about 140 miles from my inlaws. In Iowa we don't use miles so my parents are 3 hours away and my inlaws are 2 1/2 hours away.

From 1998-2006 my folks moved around alot with my Dad's company, shortest distance for almost 8 years was 500 miles.

RoadKingLarry · « **Reply #18 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:17:50 PM »

After Mom died Dad bought 2 acres next to me and built a house and a shop building then married a woman that lives in Iowa. He now spends most of his time in Iowa.

Grandpa Shooter · « **Reply #19 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:21:31 PM »

Sorry about the gap folks.

Point is, how many of us are actually close enough to help our parents or even know what their situation is? We have become a fragmented society, where in the past, people pretty much stuck close to home. I separated from my family by choice as have a few of you I see. If the need arose I would take my Mother in, but at this point she chooses to live in that big old house alone and even refused the County Nursing Assoc. visits I set up for here. Her statement was, "I'll just stay here and die in my own home since you kids don't care enough to come visit!" Which of course is not true, but she wants to believe it is.

mtnbkr · « **Reply #20 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:24:47 PM »

Quote

Point is, how many of us are actually close enough to help our parents or even know what their situation is?

I think technology has mitigated that to an extent. While I don't see my folks in person as often as I'd like, between teleconferencing over the Internet, digital pics, cellphones that let us chat at a moment's notice, etc, we stay in contact more often than we did with other family members when those technologies weren't available (as recently as 1995ish).

Chris

jackdanson · « **Reply #21 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:34:49 PM »

Less than 25 feet... we live in an adjacent condo! I like it, I love my parents, we eat dinner on sundays, and we watch eachothers dogs all the time, it's pretty convenient. I helped get their driveway clean this morning.

Rudy Kohn · « **Reply #22 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:41:03 PM »

My whole family (pretty much... all of my best friends, too) is in Michigan, I'm here in Austin for graduate school.
But, I'm just a young-un; my parents aren't retired, so I don't really have to worry about taking care of them, at least not for another 15 years or so.

But, I have really good relationships with both of my parents, so I head up to Michigan twice a year at least and phone them every week or so.

mtnbkr · « **Reply #23 on:** January 28, 2009, 12:57:29 PM »

Quote from: jackdanson on January 28, 2009, 12:34:49 PM

Less than 25 feet... we live in an adjacent condo! I like it, I love my parents, we eat dinner on sundays, and we watch eachothers dogs all the time, it's pretty convenient. I helped get their driveway clean this morning.

I would love that, but my wife and the rest of our families would kill me if I moved us to Alabama. Back when they lived in Roanoke, I was desperately trying to find a job there. Would've been nice to be in the same town as my folks and in-laws, especially with the kids. I've been tempted to move to Knoxville since it's only 4hrs from Roanoke (we're 4hrs away on this side), but would be only 8hrs from my folks. However, we would be 8hrs from my wife's extended family in the Richmond area and 8hrs from my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. No easy way to do it as long as my folks are in Mobile. :(

Chris

K Frame · « **Reply #24 on:** January 28, 2009, 01:00:05 PM »

Almost exactly 180 miles (179 and some change) door to door.

It drives me insane that I'm so far from Mom, especially in winter.

She called me a few weeks ago and her boiler had quit. It was all I could do to keep from hopping in the car and running up.

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Author Topic: Distance you live from your parents (Read 8374 times)