Lessons learned the hard way...

[grislyatoms]

1. Never co-sign a loan.
2. Tax "experts" are mythical creatures.
3. Marriage licenses cost $30. Divorces are exponentially(like lots) more expensive.
4. Discipline is learned, and not inherent. Same goes for courtesy and honor.
5. Older folks are full of wisdom. Younger folks can't understand that wisdom until they are older folks.
6. Don't spend more than you earn.
7. Post-pubertal girls are irrational. Even daughters. But we love them anyway.
8. If it sounds too good to be true...it is.
9. Just because someone says "that's not a dog, because dogs don't look like that" doesn't mean it's not actually a dog.
10. Just because someone is from a certain ethnic group doesn't absolve them from being an egregiously egotistical prick. See #9.

What wisdom from "Hardknocks U. " did y'all learn?

[Nick1911]

Don't marry young.
Buy low, sell high.
Life is what you make of it.
When you have to shoot, shoot.  Don't talk. 
Know yourself.  Be yourself.
Seek peace, but understand violence.

[Brad Johnson]

Saving your behind starts by thinking with your head.
Expect the best, prepare for the worst.
Don't expect generousity, earn it.
"Pay it forward" works as long as you don't expect a return on investment.
If it won't matter twenty years from now, it shouldn't matter now.
A lump in your breast is a problem. A lump in your outmeal is an inconvenience.
There is a context for everything.
Arguing with an idiot is proof you are no smarter than they are.
You need food, water, and shelter.  You want everything else.
You're never too old to learn.
Most personal problems are self-imposed.
You can get anyone to do anything so long as they think it's their idea.
Laughing it off is healthier than brooding.
Taking a few minutes to plan really does save a lot of time, effort, and money.
Smart and prepared usually trumps dumb and impulsive.
When it comes to fixing things it's less about dollars and more about sense.
Live well.  Laugh often.  Love much.

Brad

[Mabs2]

...that wax can get much hotter than water, and if you build a fire on top of candle wax and then spill it on, say, half of your hand it will give you a bad one or two degree burn.

[cassandra and sara's daddy]

wash your hand real well after slicing fresh jalepenos and definitely before using the bathroom

[Sindawe]

No matter how sweet and lovable the kitty is, waking kitty from a nap by grabbing him and yelling BOO! is a bad idea.
Mr. H2SO4 and Mr. NaOH are NOT friends and will object most vigrously to sharing the same container.
Even if they are family, some are better kept at a distance.
Wear TWO layers of latex gloves when slicing jalepenos.
Balisongs bite.

[RevDisk]

If you see someone hit the floor, jump behind a solid barrier or start running, immediately do the same.

Never steal something with a chaingun attached to it unless you're really sure you can get away with it.

Always have an exit plan.

[AJ Dual]

The standard POTS dial-tone is about 48VDC.

The ring can be upwards of 140VDC.

The modulations that make up the dial-tone and the ring signal feel much worse than simple 60hz AC.

Don't strip phone wire with your teeth because you're too lazy to get up for a tool. And if you do, be really sure both wires of the pair aren't in your mouth at the same time.

[Jim147]

Sometimes we carry more weight than we owe.

jim

[S. Williamson]

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let not this blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams; it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann, 1692/1927

[Zardozimo Oprah Bannedalas]

1. The gun is good
2. The penis is evil
3. Nothing is scarier than you can imagine.
4. Going commando is a good idea during summer months.
5. Do your best and get on with your life.
6. Hammocks are awesome.

[sanglant]

wash your hand real well after slicing fresh jalepenos and definitely before using the bathroom

or putting in your contacts.

sell high, buy low. for when the market is going down and you don't own the stock but can buy it later for less than you can sell it for now.

don't stick your hand in the computer while your on the phone to tech support, and it's running.
it's not not loaded.
clean your glasses.

[Physics]

Never argue with an idiot, bystanders won't be able to tell the difference. 

The destruction of a person builds character. 

Jackson's Electrodynamics is hard.  Really, really hard. 

Never let undergrads take up more than 25% of your day. 

Don't assume your general physics professor knows the 4 rules.

Never eat egg salad that's been in the sun.

Don't try to fistfight with your dad. 

Don't procrastinate (I've finally figured that one out!).

[crt360]

Life's most enduring regrets often come from doing what seemed right at the time.

Every person has the time to achieve great things, but few have the discipline or desire.

There are a lot more sorry a-holes out there than you'd imagine.

[lee n. field]

What wisdom from "Hardknocks U. " did y'all learn?

There's not necessarily a good solution.

[RoadKingLarry]

The "general public" is collectively a booger eating moron.

Youth is wasted on the young.

Raccoons prefer to eat sweet corn that is 2 days shy of being ripe.

There are an awful lot of stupid people in the world.

Don't loan my brother anything with an internal combustion engine attached to it.

Don't buy anything from my brother that has an internal combustion engine.

The smaller and more critical a part is the more likely you are to drop it and lose it. If it is no longer in production or otherwise difficult to replace, the odds of dropping it or breaking it increase exponentially.

There are very few problems in life that cannot be solved with a appropriate application of high explosives.

Getting old sucks, but it beats the alternative.

[AmbulanceDriver]

Never steal something with a chaingun attached to it unless you're really sure you can get away with it.

Anybody else *really* wanna hear the story behind this?  :D

[Jocassee]

Never drop an SKS bolt unless it's pointed in a safe direction.

[Jamisjockey]

The hokey poke is really what it's all about.

[griz]

Treat others the way you would like to be treated.

If somebody is trying to sell you the secret to making money, that's how they make their money.

If tits, tires, or testicles it will eventually cause trouble.

[Tallpine]

Half the people in the world are below average intelligence.

The outside of a horse is the best thing for the inside of a man.

[makattak]

The outside of a horse is the best thing for the inside of a man.

... you eat rawhide?

[Declaration Day]

Value only certain opinions, from certain people, at certain times.

If you want it done right, do it yourself.

Never lend out money you can't afford to lose.  Help people in other ways if you can, but keep your cash in your pocket.

[Scout26]

You can learn from others mistakes or from your own, the former being much less painful then the latter.

Just do it.

[Physics]

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.