Yeah, the kilt thing crossed my mind, too - but I was thinking more of the feileadh mòr (great wrap) and maybe no leine (shirt). My belt would be all that is holding that on. Would all that wool wrapped around you count as a "coat" or "jacket" ?
That could be awesome if some jackass demands you remove the belt, but a utilikilt or similar is stiff enough and tight enough over the hips, what with the sewn-down pleats that about the only way to do the testicular grope would be to reach up under. Now we know why the gloves, I guess....
Hm, so...what do they do about women in pencil skirts or similar?
Also--what about people with bandages? People travel for surgery all the time. What about "suspicious" feeling scars? For years, if you ran your hand across my leg, it felt positively corrugated, from scars, and there people with far knottier and weirder feeling scars than mine. Oh wow--next creepy thought: This is America, land of the overgrown pannus. If you've got eight inches of gut overhang, do they grope up under there? Hope they change their gloves, before they give a yeast infection to the next person in line. And this whole cupping the breast thing--that words for the cuties, but whole lots of women have graduated from "cup" to "softball in a tube sock"--how far up there are they gonna grope for bombs or stashes of cash?
"Enhanced pat downs" are only useful to the extent that they can follow up on anything suspicion that turns up. So, if sumdood is on his way home from surgery for testicular cancer, and they feel something thick taped up to the dude's groin, is that when they strip off surgical dressings to verify that it's not a bomb (or possibly a newly implanted bomb....hell, it might even be radioactive!
Really though, my biggest personal issue with the new scanner/grope policy is that they apparently require you to surrender all of your personal belongings. When traveling, I always carry an extra stash of significant cash and an extra credit card somewhere deeply concealed, like in a t-shirt pocket under a regular long sleeve button/snap shirt, just in case my wallet gets stolen hundreds or thousands of miles from home. The TSA damn sure aren't going to take that from me
Perhaps the solution is merely to grow an extremely large and deflated gut--unless they've implemented pannus inspections, maybe you could get away with tucking it up under there. Personally, I've got a couple bras that are lined with thin but fairly stiff foam, and I could probably get some cash past an enhance pat-down--unless, along the lines of musings above, they decide that my bras are subverting their ability to sufficiently fondle my boobs. Wonder what happens then?