Wife Assaults Husband for Reading The Onion

[Ben]

Well okay then...

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/06/22/wisconsin-wife-reportedly-attacks-husband-for-reading-onion/?test=latestnews

[RocketMan]

The Onion is porn?  I'll have to start reading it more, obviously I am missing something.   

[Jamie B]

The Onion is porn!?

She has got to be the member of one of those weird churches that worship snakes or animals without feet.

[Devonai]

Feet are the only standard by which I consume animals.  Feet?  Eat it.  No feet?  Don't eat it.  Oh, except for fish.  Darn it.  Are there any fish out there with feet that I can bread and fry?

[KD5NRH]

Feet?  Eat it.

Skunks have feet.

[Perd Hapley]

Snake > fish.

[seeker_two]

Feet are the only standard by which I consume animals.  Feet?  Eat it.  No feet?  Don't eat it. 

Dolphins don't have feet....
Rosie O'Donnell has feet...

Your arguement is invalid....

[Jamie B]

Dolphins don't have feet....
Rosie O'Donnell has feet...

Your arguement is invalid....

Aack!

[wuluf]

If that article appears in the Onion, would it still be true?   

[RevDisk]

Uh, there are women who would attack their spouse for porn or the Onion?

[Perd Hapley]

Uh, there are women who would attack their spouse for porn...?

Yeah, it's not like that would be adulterous, or anything.

[RevDisk]

Yeah, it's not like that would be adulterous, or anything.

Ah... Is it? I'm actually asking, I have no idea.

[MicroBalrog]

Yeah, it's not like that would be adulterous, or anything.

Do you think physically attacking someone you suspect of adultery is somehow acceptable human behavior?

I thought people who do this are generally considered wife-beating (or in other cases husband-beating) losers? Did I miss something?

[Perd Hapley]

Ah... Is it? I'm actually asking, I have no idea.

Is it not a way of seeking sexual gratification from someone other than the marriage partner?

From what I gather, a great many women (not all, perhaps, but many) interpret their SO's use of porn as an indicator that she is not physically/sexually adequate, and that he is going to someone else to make up the difference. That somewhat misreads the male libido, which tends to seek out other sources of stimulation regardless, but this is usually lost on the aggrieved woman.

And if you've ever read anything from that Christ guy, he said that looking at other chicks for sexual jollies is committing adultery with the heart (slight paraphrase, of course). Obviously, others will have different definitions of adulterous behavior. The above is merely my opinion, and the sources thereof.

Do you think physically attacking someone you suspect of adultery is somehow acceptable human behavior?

Will you please refrain from reading things into people's comments? It is a pattern. Read more carefully, please.

To answer your question, I didn't say it was OK. I suggested a reason why a woman might react strongly to a husband's consumption of porn.

Still, to compare a guy who gets a "beating" because he was perusing porn, to battered wives? That's really offensive.

[MicroBalrog]

Why? Is physically attacking males somehow better than violently attacking females?

If someone violently attacks you on purpose, you are clearly not having a healthy relationship.

Is it not a way of seeking sexual gratification from someone other than the marriage partner?

Here I was thinking that there's a giant difference between thinking of doing something and actually doing it (hint: pornography consumers don't actually have sex with the porn stars).

Well-adjusted people do not physically assault their significant others based on what they read.

[Perd Hapley]

Why? Is physically attacking males somehow better than violently attacking females?

For a man to attack a woman is, of course, an order of magnitude worse than for either sex to attack a man.

If someone violently attacks you on purpose, you are clearly not having a healthy relationship.

If you are using porn, you are clearly not having a healthy relationship.

Here I was thinking that there's a giant difference between thinking of doing something and actually doing it (hint: pornography consumers don't actually have sex with the porn stars).

Of course there is. Again, read carefully to avoid unwarranted inferences. (Hint: I said it was bad; not as bad.)

Well-adjusted people do not physically assault their significant others based on what they read.

That is your opinion. You should be more concerned about the pathology of the porn-consuming husband, than the anger of the wife.


For the record, I think the woman in the story sounds a little nuts.

[Strings]

>For a man to attack a woman is, of course, an order of magnitude worse than for either sex to attack a man.<

Pardon my well-hidden liberalism, but I feel that attacking anyone physically is bad, no "order of magnitude" involved.

>If you are using porn, you are clearly not having a healthy relationship.<

Not your call. I can think of many reasons why one partner or the other may decide to utilize porn (speaking of actual porn, not the Onion), yet still have a healthy relationship. Such defined as "all partners happy"

 >Of course there is. Again, read carefully to avoid unwarranted inferences. (Hint: I said it was bad; not as bad.)<

This is a judgement based on the teachings of your faith. Kinda loses traction when applied to folks who don't follow the same faith

>That is your opinion. You should be more concerned about the pathology of the porn-consuming husband, than the anger of the wife.<

"Pathology"? Seriously? The Onion?

Even if he was "caught" watching "Two Girls One Cup", with printouts of Tubgirl... doesn't qualify as justification for physical assault. Period. Full stop

>For the record, I think the woman in the story sounds a little nuts.<

That would be the oft-mentioned "understatement". Woman is psycho. Makes me wonder why he decided to marry the woman in the first place 

[MicroBalrog]

For a man to attack a woman is, of course, an order of magnitude worse than for either sex to attack a man.

I don't feel this to be the case. Certainly if you attack someone who cannot resist you (either by being in a relationship with you, or for a health reason) it is totally not permissible, whether they are a woman, a man, or whoever.'

Yes, there is such a thing as battered husbands (this should not come as a surprise to any individual). Spousal abuse is bad whoever does it.

[RevDisk]

Well, fistful, honestly I respect your belief system. Ideologically, I'll admit, I believe under the law, assault should be assault.  Personally, I'm sure I'd get emotionally more worked up about a stereotypical large, strong guy beating the hell out of a normal sized, untrained lady. I'm sure a gang of women stumping the heck out of a 6 year old male would be extremely bothersome to me.

As for porn being adulterous, ah, gotcha, I follow the logic. Sorta. Would CGI, hand drawn or cartoon porn still count? I mean, they're female form but obviously they're not "women" in the biological sense because they don't exist. Can you commit adultery of the heart with something that isn't real? I'm guessing yes, because porn is just light that forms pretty pictures (hopefully) or colored paper.

[Jamie B]

And if you've ever read anything from that Christ guy, he said that looking at other chicks for sexual jollies is committing adultery with the heart (slight paraphrase, of course). Obviously, others will have different definitions of adulterous behavior. The above is merely my opinion, and the sources thereof.

Ironically confirmed by Jimmy Carter during his interview with Playboy magazine....

[lupinus]

As for porn being adulterous, ah, gotcha, I follow the logic. Sorta. Would CGI, hand drawn or cartoon porn still count? I mean, they're female form but obviously they're not "women" in the biological sense because they don't exist. Can you commit adultery of the heart with something that isn't real? I'm guessing yes, because porn is just light that forms pretty pictures (hopefully) or colored paper.

Sure, just as just creating a ransom woman in a random fantasy created only in ones mind would be equally adulterous as watching porn.

The point isn't so much the form in this case, as is the act of lustful thoughts or fantasy.

[MicroBalrog]

Sure, just as just creating a ransom woman in a random fantasy created only in ones mind would be equally adulterous as watching porn.

The point isn't so much the form in this case, as is the act of lustful thoughts or fantasy.

So basically watching porn equates to thinking of other women?

[RevDisk]

Sure, just as just creating a ransom woman in a random fantasy created only in ones mind would be equally adulterous as watching porn.

The point isn't so much the form in this case, as is the act of lustful thoughts or fantasy.

...

And this is considered bad? I was under the impression virtually everyone did so?

[Perd Hapley]

So basically watching porn equates to thinking of other women?

Well, yeah. I mean, unless the chick you're ogling is your wife, then you're seeking sexual gratification from someone else.

[MicroBalrog]

Well, yeah. I mean, unless the chick you're ogling is your wife, then you're seeking sexual gratification from someone else.

So, basically, you consider it.... in some way reasonable (not permissible, mind, but in some way at least not-completely-insane) for someone to assault their life partner because they - not so much as actually cheated on them, but have thought, sexually, of another person, even though they have no serious intent of getting it on with the other person - and indeed, if the other person does not exist?

Is that right?