Real men beat the beard in with a hammer and bite it off on the inside.
As for a straight razor, in my experience it is not nearly as difficult as most people claim. I taught myself to use one in a week. I did get a number of cuts, but they were all small cuts, I simply do not understand how it is possible to get a cut serious enough to cause a lasting scar. Once the skill is aquired, it's like riding a bike.
I got mine while I was in the military. When I was learning to use it, my room mate claimed that there was more blood than water in the wash basin. But that was just malicious rumor mongering... And I have no scars to prove it.