Author Topic: I have terrible news  (Read 1024 times)

Hawkmoon

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I have terrible news
« on: March 15, 2016, 08:58:12 PM »
The country is officially hosed.

I just received word, directly from the Political Director of the Republican National Committee, that I am the Republican Party's last hope for defeating Hillary Clinton in November.

These deviant crackheads actually expect me to donate money to them so that "our candidates" will have the funding to defeat the Clinton machine. They actually use the term "grassroots" -- as if nobody in the country has any idea that the two leading Republican grassroots candidates are being actively opposed by the party itself.

If nothing else, this year's election wins the all-time award for macabre humour.

Quote
Friend, you’re our Party’s last hope.

We’re facing five more elections today and need to raise $15,300 for our Super Tuesday Grassroots Fund by 2 PM. Will you contribute?

CONTRIBUTE $100

CONTRIBUTE $75

CONTRIBUTE $50

CONTRIBUTE $35

If Hillary or Bernie wins in 2016, Obama’s dream to fundamentally change America will become a reality.

...And there will be little we can do to reverse course.

I know you want to stop them and elect a Republican president in 2016. And yes, it will be a Republican.

But it WILL NOT happen unless we have the resources to win.

Your gift of just $35 could mean the difference between saving our country or letting it fall into the hands of the radical left.

Our candidates are relying on us to secure the resources to win. And after Obama’s litany of failures, they stand a chance of winning.

Americans have spent the last seven years watching our president tour the world apologizing for the greatest country ever to exist.

Your EMERGENCY Super Tuesday gift of $100, $75, $50, or even just $35 will ensure the Republican Party can build the grassroots army it will take to win in November.

We’ve experienced the worst terrorist attack since 9/11. We’ve seen $150 billion shoveled over to the greatest state sponsor of terrorism on the planet. We’ve seen ISIS terrorize the free world.

To think that another liberal elitist could “lead” this country makes me sick.

Do not let that happen, Friend. Contribute today.

This November, I don’t want to just beat the Democrats, I want to usher in a CRUSHING victory -- sending a message that America refuses four more years of failure and disaster.

Losing is not an option. We must win.

And that means securing the Election Day funds by 2 PM today.

Friend, I will personally check to see if you helped our Party meet this Super Tuesday goal.

I trust you won’t disappoint me.

Stand up to Obama, fight for our candidates, and make March the best month in conservative history.

Contribute just $35 right now.

Thanks,

Chris Carr
Political Director
Republican National Committee
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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

castle key

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Re: I have terrible news
« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2016, 09:01:51 PM »
Probably get better ROI with the Nigerian scam.
Vigilate hoc, tenendum per ebrietatem.

Hawkmoon

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Re: I have terrible news
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2016, 09:03:15 PM »
Yeah ... now where did I put that e-mail from Mr. PetersonTony?
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100% Politically Incorrect by Design

MillCreek

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Re: I have terrible news
« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2016, 09:35:16 PM »
Quote
We’ve seen $150 billion shoveled over to the greatest state sponsor of terrorism on the planet.

Which country is this referring to?
_____________
Regards,
MillCreek
Snohomish County, WA  USA


Quote from: Angel Eyes on August 09, 2018, 01:56:15 AM
You are one lousy risk manager.

cordex

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Re: I have terrible news
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2016, 09:54:26 PM »
Which country is this referring to?
Saudi Iranria.

Seriously though, probalby Iran.  Then again, we give significant foreign aid (for certain definitions of aid) pretty generously to all three official "State Sponsors of Terrorism©."