Gas cans as a metaphor for life

[Hawkmoon]

I've been having problems with my mowers this year, and I suspect that much of the problem can be attributed to the fact that Connecticut mandates 10% ethanol in our gasoline. And (unlike global warming/climate change) the experts are in complete agreement that ethanol does bad things to small engine carburetors. So I've decided to start creating my own small engine fuel by removing the ethanol from gasoline.

I have two 2-cycle tools: a chain saw, and a string trimmer. Those require 2-cycle oil mixed in with the gas. I don't want to mix large quantities, so I went looking for a 1-gallon (4 liter) gas can. What a shock.

I'm accustomed to nice, old-fashioned Eagle gas cans, with a simple, metal flex nozzle. More recently, they replaced the steel flex spout with rubber, but the can remained the same and to use it, you simply tip and pour. Like this:

https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fimg0.etsystatic.com%2F010%2F0%2F6131302%2Fil_570xN.444633490_bum8.jpg&f=1

Then they made the spouts on the steel gas cans into "safety nozzles," and the price for a 2-1/2 gallon (10 liter) can went up to about $50 or $75. So those were pretty much relegated to professionals, and the homeowners switched over to plastic. Well, now the plastic "cans" have also gone over to safety nozzles. Like this:

https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fecx.images-amazon.com%2Fimages%2FI%2F41ii-gd7fKL.jpg&f=1

I looked at this one and a couple of other brands. I finally bought a different brand at Wal-Mart, chosen on the basis that it appeared I might be able to gut the mechanism and have a simple pour spout. Now that I've got it home, I was correct -- it has already been "tuned up." So the plan is to make up a gallon of ethanol-free gasoline, then add fuel stabilizer and 2-cycle oil to it. By keeping the quantity to one gallon or less, I should be able to use it before it becomes too stale.

But the thought occurred to me that, as goeth the gas cans, so goeth life. All the modern conveniences and new laws that are supposed to make life better for us in reality accomplish the exact opposite -- they just make things more expensive, more complicated, and more difficult.

[bedlamite]

http://www.amazon.com/Gas-Spout-Replacement-Water-White/dp/B0149L17FC

[French G.]

My favoritest small engine can is an empty Coleman white gas can.

[Ben]

I just recently went through this myself while replacing a can for the first time since CARB.

As Bedlamite alluded to, you know longer have gas cans. You go buy flammable water cans. :)

[zxcvbob]

I bought a 5 gallon (20 litre?) metal Jerry can a few years ago.  It's olive rather than red, but nobody has given me any guff for putting gas in it.  My only problem with it is the spout.  It's a flexible metal "donkey dick" that would work great if the can was vented.  The can has an internal vent that looks like it's supposed to mate with a more modern spout (but not a CARB spout)  Any ideas?  It's new enough that the spout clamps onto the kind of D shaped mouth.

I'd rather not have to drill a little air hole at the top-back of the can.  (not sure how I'd even plug that; probably with a golf tee)

[charby]

When my two 2 gallon blitz can become unusable, I'm going to go to an eagle safety can and funnel. 2 cycle gas I'll put it in a 1 gallon safety can. Worse comes to worse, I'll just use an msr fuel bottle for 2 cycle gas. Only two strokes I have outside my two boat motors is my Lawn-Boy and I might use 3 gallons of fuel all summer.

[Ben]

I bought a 5 gallon (20 litre?) metal Jerry can a few years ago.  It's olive rather than red, but nobody has given me any guff for putting gas in it.  My only problem with it is the spout.  It's a flexible metal "donkey dick" that would work great if the can was vented.  The can has an internal vent that looks like it's supposed to mate with a more modern spout (but not a CARB spout)  Any ideas?  It's new enough that the spout clamps onto the kind of D shaped mouth.

I'd rather not have to drill a little air hole at the top-back of the can.  (not sure how I'd even plug that; probably with a golf tee)

The spout I got came with a vent plug. It's plastic, but it's pretty heavy duty and doesn't leak. I bet Amazon has the vent caps separate for a few bucks or so. Mine jut friction fit, but going plastic to metal you probably want to use some gas proof adhesive.

[zxcvbob]

1 liter pop bottles work great for mixing and storing small amounts of 2-cycle gas.  I use a 10cc syringe for measuring the oil.

[Hawkmoon]

I'd rather not have to drill a little air hole at the top-back of the can.  (not sure how I'd even plug that; probably with a golf tee)

http://www.amazon.com/YELLOW-Shipping-Chilton-Rotopax-Rubbermaid/dp/B00MNC6L24%3FSubscriptionId%3DAKIAILSHYYTFIVPWUY6Q%26tag%3Dduckduckgo-d-20%26linkCode%3Dxm2%26camp%3D2025%26creative%3D165953%26creativeASIN%3DB00MNC6L24

[Hawkmoon]

http://www.amazon.com/Gas-Spout-Replacement-Water-White/dp/B0149L17FC

I know where I can buy spouts -- they cost more than an entire new plastic gas "can." My point was simply that the nanny state .gov has made the simple gasoline can, something generations of people the world over managed to use with few accidents, into something that's more complex, more expensive, more difficult to use, and significantly less utilitarian.

And that struck me as a metaphor for life. My apologies for attempting to wax philosophic.

[HankB]

I know where I can buy spouts -- they cost more than an entire new plastic gas "can." My point was simply that the nanny state .gov has made the simple gasoline can, something generations of people the world over managed to use with few accidents, into something that's more complex, more expensive, more difficult to use, and significantly less utilitarian.

And that struck me as a metaphor for life. My apologies for attempting to wax philosophic.

They've buggered up everything from automobiles to broadcast TV to flush toilets to propane cylinders for your BBQ.   

[Ben]

I know where I can buy spouts -- they cost more than an entire new plastic gas "can." My point was simply that the nanny state .gov has made the simple gasoline can, something generations of people the world over managed to use with few accidents, into something that's more complex, more expensive, more difficult to use, and significantly less utilitarian.

And that struck me as a metaphor for life. My apologies for attempting to wax philosophic.

Oh believe me, we hear you. The CARB spout will probably get its own place in the dictionary under "fail". I can't think of another everyday example of gov interference that comes close.

I'm just glad the EPA has nothing to do with doorknobs, or it would take me three hours to get in and out of the house.

[RoadKingLarry]

As I understand it, the whole "reasoning" behind the CARB gas can abomination was to prevent the release of those nasty gas fumes.
Where the *expletive deleted*ck to the idiots that came up with the nonsense think the fumes go?

[Perd Hapley]

But the thought occurred to me that, as goeth the gas cans, so goeth life. All the modern conveniences and new laws that are supposed to make life better for us in reality accomplish the exact opposite -- they just make things more expensive, more complicated, and more difficult.

Hard fail. Your complaint is that the new laws get in the way of using your modern conveniences (chain saws and the like). We all know these new laws are stupid (well, maybe not Charby), but if "modern conveniences" are getting in your way, then go back to trimming your yard with a sickle.

[Firethorn]

As I understand it, the whole "reasoning" behind the CARB gas can abomination was to prevent the release of those nasty gas fumes.
Where the *expletive deleted*ck to the idiots that came up with the nonsense think the fumes go?

It's not just the fumes.  Keeping the fumes contained is good, helps preserve the value of the gas - keeps it from going stale quite as quickly. 

The real problem is that they decided that the cans need to be 'safe' and 'handicapped accessible' and all that.

Not realizing that you don't really need yet another safety after the safety of the initial cap being removed, and that requiring a hand on the spout to activate said safety is contradictory to usability, especially for cans bigger than a gallon or so, because being able to use TWO hands on the can is safer than 1 on the can and 1 on the spout.

There's lots of people out there that have found that removing said safety fixes most of their problems causing spilled gas.

Really, I wonder if the EPA actually tested their new cans for usability?

[230RN]

"And that struck me as a metaphor for life. My apologies for attempting to wax philosophic."

Comments about the new cans always start a rant-sequence, disunirregardless of philosophical analogies.

I noted that in Ace Hardware, those spouts were on the shelf right next to the new California cans.  Leastways I think that's what they're called nowadays.  Natural merchandise tie-in, of course, but it kind of amused me.

I bought one of those 1-gal modern cans a couple of years ago and kept it in the car, dry, just in case, and sure enough, my fuel gage went kerflooie, so I had to actually use it one day.

When I got home just on general principles, I tried to empty the remaining couple of ounces into a funnel in the gas tank fill pipe.  I could not empty it no matter what I did shake-wise and orientation-wise and cuss-wise.

I finally had to leave it in the ditch next to my parking space and let the remaining fuel evaporate in the sun.

Let me repeat that for emphasis.  I had to let the remaining fuel evaporate.

Get it?  This can, which was supposed to reduce air pollution...

Aw, the hell with it if you didn't get it by now.

Terry, 230RN

[grampster]

"Really, I wonder if the EPA actually tested their new cans for usability?"

Hah!  That you would even ask that question forces me to tell you to go stand in the corner for an hour and then write "I am a bureaucrat and I'm never, ever wrong and 'What does it mater'." 1000 times on the blackboard.

[griz]

Kind of an aside from the gas can metaphor (which i agree with, sort of like a Peter Principle for regulations), how do you remove alcohol from fuel?  Wouldn't it be simpler to buy race gas or av-gas?

[charby]

Hard fail. Your complaint is that the new laws get in the way of using your modern conveniences (chain saws and the like). We all know these new laws are stupid (well, maybe not Charby), but if "modern conveniences" are getting in your way, then go back to trimming your yard with a sickle.

I think many of the laws for safety are pretty stupid.

[Perd Hapley]

I think many of the laws for safety are pretty stupid.

I meant the ethanol regs.

[Nick1911]

Kind of an aside from the gas can metaphor (which i agree with, sort of like a Peter Principle for regulations), how do you remove alcohol from fuel?  Wouldn't it be simpler to buy race gas or av-gas?

If you mix a small amount of water in with the fuel, the ethanol will end up in the water layer.  Let it settle and decant the fuel off.  Note, this will reduce the octane rating of the remaining fuel.

[dogmush]

Really, I wonder if the EPA actually tested their new cans for usability?

[EPA Voice]
They aren't OUR cans.  We don't manufacture anything.  We just addressed a gap in the existing regulations to protect the environment.  We closed the "spill gas loophole".  If the new, environmentally responsible cans don't work, it's the fault of the can manufacturers.  They're the ones that can't design a simple gas can.  This is yet another failure of the free market system to address the needs of society.  As it disproportionately affects poor and minorities (Rich White folks ave lawn services)  it can obviously not be allowed to stand.  We will immediately start a focus group to design an unspillable gas can, and to make the EPA the sole source for legal petroleum carrying devices.

Thank you for contacting us with your concerns, we here at the EPA take gas can safety seriously.

[/EPA Voice]

[Marnoot]

After futzing with one of the new cans that requires 3 hands to operate without spilling anything for a couple years, I just settled on using the old metal jerry-can-ish style with appropriate spout.

[KD5NRH]

I looked at this one and a couple of other brands. I finally bought a different brand at Wal-Mart, chosen on the basis that it appeared I might be able to gut the mechanism and have a simple pour spout. Now that I've got it home, I was correct -- it has already been "tuned up." So the plan is to make up a gallon of ethanol-free gasoline, then add fuel stabilizer and 2-cycle oil to it. By keeping the quantity to one gallon or less, I should be able to use it before it becomes too stale.

At least here, WalMart and Tractor Supply have the quart cans of ethanol-free premixed two stroke fuel.  Overpriced, but the steel can is very reusable, just about the right size for carrying around with a chainsaw or weedeater, and cheaper than buying a gallon can.

Quick we search shows Lowes, Home Depot and Sears have TruFuel quarts for $6.  As I recall, Connecticut is surrounded by several other counties that also have mistaken themselves for actual states, so you should be able to bootleg a couple quarts pretty easily.

[Hawkmoon]

Kind of an aside from the gas can metaphor (which i agree with, sort of like a Peter Principle for regulations), how do you remove alcohol from fuel?  Wouldn't it be simpler to buy race gas or av-gas?

You remove alcohol from gasoline by adding water, shaking, and allowing it to settle out.

No airports near me, and no other outlets in my state are allowed to sell gasoline w/o ethanol. I only know of one auto racetrack left in the state, and I know they don't have any gas pumps. All racers bring their own fuel.